Meant To Be
by sweeplogs
Summary: Destiny put Bella and Jake together since they were children. With Jake's suddenly harboring a secret, Edward trying to get in the way and Bella being a magnet for danger, will they make it through? Will they ever get to just be Jake and Bells again?
1. Introduction

**Disclaimer; I don't own Twilight, nor do I own anything associated with it. I'm merely doing this for entertainment purposes and to keep the storypeople alive. I do, however, own this storyline and the non-needy personality in Bella for future guidance.  
**_**NOTE!: **_**Spoilers within****. If you haven't read New Moon, then don't read this. It contains events and happenings from the novel .. just a warning.**

The proud parents of Isabella and Jacob watched as they played in the sand in front of Billy Black's house, smiling happily. Isabella was running after Jacob with a pail of sand in her hands, but the tables turned and Jacob tackled Isabella to the ground, both laughing so hard they were tearing up.

"They're adorable, aren't they?" Renee Swan asked, clasping her hands in front of her heart.

"It's like they're meant for each other," Sarah Black replied, looking equally as thrilled.

"They're going to be together forever." Renee added, and they sighed contentedly, thinking of no other way that their children could go besides each other. Billy Black and Charlie Swan looked at each other and rolled their eyes at their wives, taking a swig of beer, but were happy all the same.

Isabella and Jacob came towards the parents with their hands clasped together in front of them, looking devilishly at their parents.

"Look what we found." Isabella's high-pitched squeal sounded out, and Jacob giggled. They opened their hands and a frog jumped out. They scrambled after it to no avail. It was gone. Isabella sunk to the ground, her lower lip turning inside out into a pout. Jacob knelt in front of her, putting his arms importantly on her shoulders.

"Bewwa." He said, his speech not quite formed yet. "We'll go get another one." He grabbed her hand and pulled her up so that she was standing, and drug her off to a large puddle in the driveway.

"Bella, what a nice nickname he has for her," Sarah said, looking at Renee. "a lot easier to say than Isabella."

Renee looked thoughtful: "It is a nice nickname, _Bella_." She smiled. "I like it."

"Jakie!" Bella squealed as he splashed water on her. She splashed back and they both tottered over into the water, now soaked and continuing to run around chasing each other.

"Well, they're already close. We know that for sure." Charlie put in gruffly, being as typical as any father at the thought of his daughter with a boy.

"Oh, Charlie. They're just friends." Sarah scolded, glancing over to the children. Jake was now sitting behind Bella, running his dirty fingers through her mid-back length hair sweetly.

"Pretty good friends too. Let it be." Renee swatted Charlie, grinning.

Inevitably, the parents were delighted at how close their children were, and how close that they would grow to be.


	2. Afresh

_"We're moving." _

_Charlie's voice echoed in her head as she sat in front of the little red house, tears streaming from her eyes, her nose running and her hair a mess from running her fingers through it. She couldn't see anymore and she couldn't move. _

_"Bella, what's wrong? Baby." Jake's soft rumble came from beside her as his warm arms wrapped around her body. She turned to him and pawed at his chest. His lips danced across her forehead as he asked again. _

_She said something unintelligible, but she knew Jake already knew what happened. After she calmed down enough to stop shaking, Jake let his grip loosen and moved his large hands to cup her face, where he wiped away her tears._

_"Listen, you're probably not going far. Most likely just into Forks. That means I can still see you after school, and on weekends. You're not moving across the country." He smiled brilliantly. Jake had always been a sort of rock in her life: a constant. She was grateful. _

_"You really think it'll be okay?" She asked, turning her face up towards his. He grinned and hugged her. _

_"Of course it will be." _

I woke up to sunshine filtering through my window. It was so cheery, so bright. I hated every moment of it. I threw my hand over my face and rolled over, pulling the covers over my eyes. There was no way I was getting up this morning. I felt tired and grumpy and whatever else could describe what I was feeling. Just then I heard my door fly open, and I heard the muted footsteps across my carpet.

"Wakey wakey!" Charlie's cheery voice yelled. I grunted in reply. "You have to get up Bella, you have to go to school." I growled, but he wasn't having any of it. He pulled at my covers and they went flying across the room.

"Dad!" I screamed, curling up into a little ball. "Get out!"

He only laughed and walked out the door. I heard him thumping down the stairs and I felt so bitter, I was cursing him out in my head. This was not a good morning. I was not thinking coherently. I got up out of my bed and stretched, reaching up towards my ceiling, when the last thing I expected to happen at this particular moment did. A dark-skinned figure came tumbling at me. I jumped backwards onto my bed and let out a small squeal of surprise despite myself. The tanned figure unfolded himself and stood straight up, having to duck his head because of the low ceiling.

"Jacob?" I asked, "What are you doing here?" I fell down to a sitting position on my mattress, immediately in a better mood.

"I came to say good luck." His deep voice resonated through my room as he came to a kneeling position in front of me. "I know that you need the support today." He smiled at me, his white teeth showing through his broad lips on his beautiful tanned face. He put his arms around me and pulled me in towards him. I nuzzled into his neck.

"Yes. I think I needed that." I said, closing my eyes.

"I heard your cheerful conversation with your father this morning." His voice vibrated on my temple. I opened my eyes and sat back, taking his hands.

"So I'm not a morning person. Sue me" I countered, pulling away and sliding to my headboard. I stared at him ruefully. He paused, looking thoughtful. Then he crawled up onto my bed and towards me, hovering over me, not touching any part of my body. He brought his face less than an inch from mine and looked into my eyes. I could feel the heat generating from the closeness of his body.

Slowly; softly, he brushed his lips against mine, instantly igniting a fire in my body. But before my body had time to respond, his lips left mine and he then pulled back.

"I think I can do something to change that." His voice was husky.

"What are you doing here so early?" I whispered, aware of my probable morning breath.

"I already told you, besides I am, however, a morning person." He replied. I reached my arms up to wrap around him, but in a movement quicker than I could comprehend, I was flung from my sitting position and found myself sitting on his lap. I pressed my lips against his cheek, and said the last words that I wanted to at this moment.

"Jake, I have to get ready if I'm ever going to get there." I laughed. He slid me off of him and set me beside him. He then scooted to where I was only seconds before, feet dangling lazily off the edge of the bed.

"I'll be here then." He said, smiling at me.

It took a lot to tear myself away from him and to begin my morning ritual. I knew that I wasn't going to eat without him, so I showered and dressed in the bathroom, brushing my teeth and letting my hair fall in soft waves down my back. I didn't wear makeup, I didn't feel the need to in a place as rainy as this. I gave myself one last glance in the mirror before walking down the short hallway to my room.

I had barely made it in the doorway to my bedroom when strong arms wrapped around me and my back was then pressed up against the wall. Jacob's dark eyes met mine and he smiled mischieviously, running his thumb down my jawline and back up. He traced my lips before bending his head down and meeting mine with his more roughly than earlier this morning. He pressed his body flush up against mine, and I couldn't focus on a single thing anymore, let alone perform the simplest function like breathing. It was surprising how he could still do this to me. My hands, of their own accord, slipped under his shirt and ran across the valley in his back that his muscles made. My hands came around to his hips and i ran my thumbs along the sensitive spot near his hipbones. He visibly shivered, and growled into my mouth.

He was the first to distangle himself, apologizing with small, soft kisses on my mouth, my nose, my forehead and my cheeks.

"I'm starved." He said, his voice rough, grinning at me. "I didn't eat before coming over here."

"Then let's go eat." I replied, taking his huge hand in my own before practically skipping down the stairs. He had almost made me forget about starting a new school. Oh no. I was starting at a new school in about forty five minutes. I stopped dead in the middle of the stairs, almost causing Jacob to run into me. He let out a small breath of air and caught my hips, in case I fell.

"What is it?" He asked, sounding concerned. He stepped around so that he was facing me. Two steps down, we were the same height. I sighed.

"I start at Forks High in less than an hour." I looked down at my feet.

"Oh Bella, I thought I had you distracted from that." Jake smiled at me, then ruffled my hair. "Don't worry. It's going to be fine."

"Speaking of schools," I said suddenly, looking up at him. "Don't you have one to go to?"

"It starts later than your new one. Besides, I think I can stand to be a little late for a good cause." He lifted me up and spun me around, gracefully hopping down the rest of the stairs. I've never gotten over how much more graceful than me he is. He doesn't seem built to be graceful.

"Jake, I knew I heard your voice." Charlie said, coming in, looking cheerful at Jake's appearance.

"Hello Charlie." Jake smiled widely at Charlie as he put me down.

"How do you always manage to sneak past me, unless I open the door to your face?" Charlie asked, laughing.

"I'm sly." Jake answered, clasping his hands in front of him. "And starving. We're going to get breakfast." Charlie only laughed and headed out the door with a goodbye to us. Jake poured us cereal, and we ate in comfortable silence, Jake finishing way before me, and staring at me until I finished.

"Let's get you to school darling Bella." Jake said, disappearing from the kitchen. I dumped my bowl in the sink as I went out of the kitchen. I heard the truck roar to life, and I stepped outside, grabbing my bookbag from the floor by the door. I locked the front door and crawled into the truck, behind the wheel. I pulled out of the driveway with Jake sliding from the side into the middle beside me.

We got to the school only minutes later, and I turned off the truck and leaned back.

"It's going to be great. Think of when you started high school on the reservation, Bells." Jake ran his hands up and down my arms, trying to soothe me.

"I had you by my side then, remember?" I asked.

"Yeah, you did." Jake smiled in remembrance, lightening his constant good mood considerably. He got out of the truck, jogging around the front and opening my door. He pulled me out onto the asphalt, resting his hand on the small of my back. I looked around and saw some people gaping at Jake, some girls giving him the once over. I turned back to him.

"Look, it's a small school. Everyone here is nice." He said softly.

"You don't know anyone from here." I retorted.

"I've heard good things." He smiled reassuringly at me, then leaned down and gave me a short peck on the lips. He pulled me in for a longer hug. I felt his lips on the top of my head, and he let go of me and slipped into the truck.

"What are you doing with my truck?" I asked, then felt stupid. How did I expect him to get back to the rez?

"I'll see you after school." He said, resting one arm lazily on the wheel and reached his hand out towards me. I met his hand and curled my ring finger around his and squeezed. This was our way of telling each other how we felt and that we loved each other. He kissed the back of my hand, and then let go.

"Get to school, you doof." He smiled, then shut the door. The truck roared to life, and with a wave, he pulled out of the parking lot. I watched until he was out of sight, then faced the school, squaring my shoulders and sighing. My first day at Forks High.


	3. Gaucherie

_I'd lived on the reservation all my life, even though I wasn't Quileute. I went to school with the Quileutes and some even went on to become my best friends, and of course; Jacob Black. The closest person to my heart that I've ever had. They all accepted me as one of them, including me in their activities. _

_It was when Renee decided that she was getting tired of the rainy weather on the reservation and my decision to stay with Charlie that essentially led to my isolation from my mother. I haven't talked to her since she stepped out that doorway on a cold February morning when I was six. I never understood what had happened, and I had heard them quietly fighting, trying not to let me hear, but Charlie and I live well together. I don't think he's completely gotten over my mom, and we both pretend we've forgotten about her._

Starting a new school was going to be hard. Even though Jacob has the most easygoing nature I've ever had the luck to be with, and being with him since he was born should have worn off on me, it hadn't. I was still as shy as a battered cat, especially about going somewhere I wasn't familiar with. I walked towards the school, slowly, shuffling with my head down. If I had to do this, I was going to do it with the least amount of enthusiasm possible. I blame Charlie for this. He's the reason that I'm not going to school on the reservation, even though I understood his chance at becoming Chief of Police here. I grumbled lowly to myself.

"The new girl spends five minutes in Forks and she's already crazy. Nice headline. Front page material " A voice said from beside me. I turned to find a boy walking beside me, hands in pocket, smiling at me. He had black hair and a lanky look to him. He looked friendly enough.

"I'm not exactly new." I replied softly, confused by his interest in me. Why is he talking to me?

"Moving in from the reservation is new enough." He answered, shrugging. "New meat is new meat." He smiled suddenly at me, and I felt a blush creeping up on my cheeks.

"How do you know so much about me?" I asked.

"Small town." He replied, as if that was enough. I didn't know what Forks was like, how should I know what he was trying to tell me? But some other part of my brain told me that the reservation only had a small population as well, and things got around quite quickly there too.

"Okay, well I have to go to the office to get my information." I said, heading toward the building with the big words _OFFICE _wirtten on them. I started to walk away from him.

"If you need any help today, I'd be happy to be of assistance." The black-haired boy said, walking in the other direction. "My name's Eric!" I turned and went into the building, coming up to a desk with an old woman behind it.

"Hi, my name's Bella Swan. I'm here for my first day." I said politely to her. She looked up at me.

"Oh! Bella! I'm Mrs. Cope. You'll need your classes, here's a map to find your classes, and get every teacher to sign this slip of paper please. That's pretty much all!" She said it fast like she's done it quite a few times before.

"Thank you." I said, but I don't think she heard me. I turned to go out the door.

"Have a good day, and welcome to Forks!" Her words carried outside the door, where I now stood, looking at the buildings that I was expected to find my classes in. I felt overwhelmed and tired at the same time. I didn't want to be doing this, I just wanted to walk into Quileute Tribe School with my best friends and Jake, not be alone at some school in the next town over. I sighed and tried to find my English class with the useless map that Mrs. Cope had given me.

Ten minutes later, I walked into the English class, out of breath from running across the grounds. I scoped out an empty seat immediately, near the back. The teacher gave me a dirty look as I came up to his desk, paper in hand and a scared look about me. I tried to keep Jacob's face in my head as I stuck my chin out and handed him the slip of paper. He only glanced at it before signing it and handing it back to me. I grabbed the paper from him and turned to sit in the only available seat.

"Oh, Ms. Swan," He said, stopping me cold. All the blood rushed into my face as I slowly turned around.

"Yeah?" I asked, though my voice was only a tiny squeak. I tried to make myself as small as possible.

"Why don't you come to the front of the room, introduce yourself and tell us a few things about you." He waved me up, my feet betraying me by carrying my body to the front.

But my voice wouldn't work, I just stood at the front of the classroom, hands tightly by my side, gripping the paper in my hand.

"Well, introduce yourself." The teacher prompted.

"MynamesBellaSwan. Iusedtoliveon...thereservation." I whispered, spitting the last word out and running to my seat.

"Class, welcome Ms. Swan." He said, raising his arms. The class groaned a broken _welcome_, and the teacher kept on speaking like he wasn't interrupted. I could feel stares on me all class, some people turning around outright and staring at me. I never failed to blush everytime I caught someone's eye. And I had to endure this for the whole class. I was so relieved when that first bell rang, but I stopped when I realized that i still have four more classes PLUS lunch. I sighed and consulted my map, which told me nothing until I checked my schedule. Government. Great. I left the English building, pulling on my raincoat because it had started raining while I was in English. I had to head all the way across the school grounds to get to my next class, according to the map.

I was about halfway across the grounds when I felt someone walking beside me. I peeked through my hood and found Eric walking beside me, his hood up.

"Hey new girl." He smiled. "Do you need help getting to your next class?"

"I think I've got it." I smiled at him to not make it sound so mean. "I have Government in building four next."

"I'm headed towards there, do you want some company?" He asked, almost bouncing. "I was in English with you, but I don't think you saw me.

"No, I didn't." I answered honestly, I tried not to look at anyone during that class.

"So, you prefer Bella?" He asked, breaking the long silence.

"Yeah." I replied. I couldn't think of a single thing to talk to him about.

"Okay." He replied, seeming to be, also at a loss. "Well, here's building four. Have fun." He said, gesturing at a building. It looked exactly the same as the one I just came out of.

"Thanks." I said, rather awkwardly. "Er, Bye."

"Yeah, see you later." He replied, "I hope we have some classes together." He smiled, and then disappeared into the building beside it.

I just couldn't find conversations to be made with people all day. Most of the teachers made me stand up and introduce myself, then a few sat me at the front, where I felt every eye in the classroom on me. They asked me questions, and I stumbled over answers to them. This girl started talking to me, and I didn't have to make much conversation, but it was hard, I'm so awkward. Hopefully I get better at this. I ate my homebrought lunch in the typical cliché 'newgirl' fashion in the bathroom. I didn't go into the stall, but I sat at the sink and ate. I couldn't face so many people just yet. I know Jacob would be so ashamed of me if he knew what I was doing. He was lucky though, he's never had to change schools, change friends. But he'd have no trouble with this, he's outgoing and all that good stuff.

Biology was great. The teacher just took my slip, signed it and told me to sit down at the empty table next to the center aisle. I did so gladly, happy he hadn't made me introduce myself to the class. Gym was almost better. I didn't have to participate, and by the end of it I was so glad my first day was over. I let myself out the Gym doors, when a guy walked up beside me. He had a babyface, with blonde hair and blue eyes.

"Hi, I'm Mike. You must be Isabella." He said, smiling at me.

"Hi Mike, Bella, actually." I replied, smiling back.

"You sticking around?" He asked then.

"I have to go drop my slip off at the main office. I don't know what's happening from there." I replied, softly.

"Oh, I'll walk you there then." He grinned, walking beside me, talking as we headed over to the office. He was really nice, telling me about how he used to live in California. I retorted by saying how I was jealous of the warm weather that he had had the chance to experience.

"How are you finding Forks?" He asked suddenly, breaking out of his California story.

"I've lived next to it all my life, I've even travelled into the town quite a few times. I know how it is." I laughed.

"I knew I've seen you before." He laughed with me. He paused, waiting for me to give my sheet to Ms. Cope.

"Did you have a good day, dear?" She asked sweetly. I replied a quick yes, and stepped outside.

"Did you really have a good day?" He asked as we crossed the parking lot.

"It was alright."

"I think that..." He trailed off, looking straight ahead, I followed his gaze, and found Jacob striding towards us, looking tall and gorgeous.

"G'Afternoon Bella." He said warmly, wrapping his warm arms around me and kissing the top of my head. "Who's your friend?"

"Jake, this is Mike. Mike, Jacob." I said, and Jacob reached a hand towards him, keeping his arm around me.

"Hi Mike." Jacob said, his rumbling voice probably making Mike feeling very small.

"Hi Jacob." He replied. I saw the tendons seizing in his arm, and realized they were having one of those macho, 'who's stronger' handshakes.

"I'll see you tomorrow Mike." I said smiling at him. He uttered a goodbye and walked away. Jacob led me towards the truck, my heart skipping beats from being so close to him. He kissed the top of my head again.

"He wants you." He murmered, a low, throaty chuckle escaping him.


	4. Invincible

**I definitely own nothing, thats cause I'm no Stephenie Meyer.  
So, the thing about this chapter is that it introduces Bella and Jacobs relationship to a degree not seen in the previous chapters, but the reason I'm saying this is because I absolutely hate when I read a story and within the first few chapters they're like, 'hey, lets not wait and have sex right here no matter who sees or even if we just had a fight and its our first time and we just have some primal need.' It just drives me up the wall.  
Anyway, I hope you enjoy.. Review if you feel you should. Theyre appreciated, but on with the story already.**

_I've been there for Jacob my whole life. And he has mine. I helped him through the greiving process when his mom died; his and mine, when he lost his first tooth before me, when my mom left us, first day at school. He's such a great person. We first discovered that we could be more than friends in grade five, when hormones were budding, among other things. Our child relationship grew when we discovered that we were in love with each other soon after, our version of love. Together our whole lives, forever to be. We are meant for each other. We are pretty much halves of each other._

Jacob drove with ease and confidence, one hand on the wheel, one draped over the seat. His fingers whispered across my shoulder, and I leaned into them, grateful for the familiar contact after such a long, uncomfortable day. He chattered on about his day, about our friends, asking me questions about details of my day.

"Did you meet anyone new? Any new friends, potential friends?" He asked, grinning over at me, his teeth shining.

"Yeah, I met a few people. Couldn't talk to them." I mumbled fast, hoping he wouldn't hear. No such luck.

"Bella," He said, getting his 'parent tone' on. "You can't hide from them, you're going to school with them now, and for the rest of the year."

"I know. I think I still should be able to go to the reservation school. I have a truck." I pouted, sliding down in my seat.

"Forks school is closer. You'd have to drive twenty minutes to get to the school on the rez." Jacob said, placing his hand on my thigh. I scowled out the window until we pulled up into his driveway, where I jumped out of the truck and raced into his house.

"Afternoon Bella." Billy said from the table, where he sat, drinking coffee with Harry Clearwater.

"Hey Billy, Harry." I said, running down the hall and taking a dive at Jacob's bed. I heard Jacob come in the door and greet his dad, and Harry and hang the keys up on the hook that they kept empty for my keys, which were constantly there. I crawled under the sheets and turned towards the wall. I wasn't in the mood for anything at the moment. I just felt grumpy.

Suddenly Jake's arm snaked around my middle and his warm body was pressed up against my back, causing my stomach to turn over in the best way.

"Cheer up my Bells." He rumbled, pulling me closer to him. In the short amount of time between greeting his dad and laying down, I hadn't heard him come in, close the door, or felt him slip under the covers. He had also taken his shirt off, my favorite way to see him. I flipped around, careful not to break his nose or make some kind of stupid mistake like that. I smiled at his sudden half-nakedness.

"Ah, one way to guarantee a smile on your face." He said, laughing. I couldn't help myself. I laughed with him, placing my hand on the contours of his chest, tracing the muscles of his stomach, watching as they contracted against my touch. I looked up and found his dark eyes on me, his mouth turned into a half smile.

His lips were suddenly on mine, urgent and warm. His tongue, forever the quicker one, swiped across my lip, meeting mine. We melted into each other, tongues dancing around each other. Things often got heated up like this, especially when he took his shirt off. There was no resisting that. My heart beat rapid-fire, it felt like it was pushing through my chest and against his. I had to keep my fingers locked in his long hair, and his hand came to rest on my hip. It felt right in so many ways, but at the same time, I knew we were going to stop soon, and go no farther, so I pressed myself as close up to him as I could, letting my hands drop and run over his chest, his abdomen, until they reached his pant line, where I stopped, and slipped my hands around to his back.

We both sighed at the same time, I'm not even sure who broke the kiss. It was past our physical boundaries, as I slid back and looked into his eyes. His pupils had overpowered the dark brown, his face was flushed. I'm sure I looked the same way.

"You know," Jacob said, grabbing my hand and kissing my fingertips, something he did whenever we stopped. "Let's go for a walk." With that, he threw back the covers and pulled me along with him out the door, where we took a well worn path behind his garage. He ran his hands through his hair, but it fell back in place in his eyes, he grabbed my hand.

"These boundaries that we've set, they're getting harder to keep away from." He spun me around so that we were facing each other. "And Bella, you're gorgeous. But you're hot, and I mean that in the most gentlemanly way possible. But if anything's going to be stopped, it's going to have to slow way down. I mean glacier slow. We can't just get up to that point and then back away." His eyes were fevered, and I knew that we had almost gone too far. Again. Instead of responding right away, I hugged him, wrapping my arms tightly around his waist.

"Jacob. You're the best." I murmered into his chest, his shirt had still yet to be put back on.

"Oh, I'm peachy." He mumbled back.

"Why don't we hang out with friends, just be with others for a while?" I asked as he sunk to the ground, me ending up on top of him.

"That sounds like a good idea. That's why you're my Bella." He ruffled my hair.

I turned around and sunk into Jacob's chest, and sighed. I was happy here, it was where I wanted to be. But our relationship was still so playful, so friendly. Like best friends who slid slightly off track. We promised not to do anything very physical until we were both completely ready, and it seemed like we weren't quite yet. I did love him. So much, but I agreed with him on so many levels. This was getting to be annoying, I wanted him, and Jacob was no average guy. He was so attractive, he got my heart racing, my palms sweaty, gave me butterflies in my stomach. And I had to resist the temptation every time we were together. I couldn't imagine what it must be like for him.

"There you two are. Off hiding somewhere doing God knows what." Bina's musical voice came floating over to us. We both looked up as she and Embry and Quil stepped through the cover of the trees.

"Hey" Jacob and I both called at once. I laughed, and Jacob wove his arms around my waist.

"Hey guys." Embry, Quil and Bina came to stand near us.

"There's a small party down at First Beach tonight. To celebrate the first day back at school." Embry said, shoving his hands in his pockets.

"Of course you're invited Bella." Bina smiled, flopping down beside me. "You have to tell me how your day went."

I sighed.

"You don't really want to know." I asked, incredulously. Embry and Quil sat down so that we were in a small circle.

"Of course I do!" She laid down, resting her head on mine and Jake's legs, looking up at me impatiently.

"It was an alright day." I said, shrugging. "Nothing special. I totally wanted to be here though."

"Are you kidding me? No cute white boys that caught your eye?" She squealed, turning over onto her belly.

"Actually, there was one who was hitting on Bella." Jacob put in, laughing. "Tried to walk her to her vehicle."

"Until he saw you, right?" Bina scoffed. "God Jacob. You send every guy who sees you running for cover. Not only are you big and muscley, you're also really hot!" Bina was sitting up by now, "Isn't he Quil?"

Quil looked at a loss for words.

"Yes, Jake's good looking. I'd pretty intimidated by you, bro." Embry laughed. Bina smiled.

"See Jake? Stop being so .. muscley. Anyone that I'd like?" Bina asked, jumping around. She was always so energetic.

"I don't think so. Unless you're into the nerdy, puppy boys." I replied, relaxing more into Jake's chest. He tightened his arms around me.

"Hmm. Any boy is worth a try." She laughed. "Any girls for Quil or Embry?"

"Not at all. I think they like them a little darker." I said, winking at Quil. He laughed.

"Yeah, I think I'm doing okay with the ladies down in this end." Quil said, puffing his chest out.

"What ladies? I haven't seen you with one yet." Embry punched Quil's arm.

"Oh, they'll come around." Embry rolled his eyes at Quil. Jacob laughed.

"Oh Quil. You keep hoping." Jacob said, earning a dirty look.

We sat around talking for the next few hours, catching up. I hadn't seen my friends since the day we moved, they helped us move everything in, and then our schedules got so busy that I couldn't find a good time for us all to hang out. We walked over to Leah's house, to help carry stuff down to the beach for this evening. We walked up the front drive and right in through the door. Everyone knew everyone else so well we didn't need to knock.

"Hey Leah!" Bina yelled, hopping over to her.

"Bina!" They embraced until Leah saw me over Bina's shoulder, eyes widening.

"Bella!" She cried, letting go of Bina and running over to me, enveloping me in a huge hug, it was a little painful. She always was a lot stronger than most people. "I was starting to think you forgot about us back home." She grinned.

"Bella?" Came a voice from the corner. I looked to where it came from, and saw Seth standing on the stairs. He walked towards me, grinning goofily. "I missed you." He said, blushing a little bit, hugging me.

"Okay, enough of welcoming Bella back. It's not like she's been gone forever." Quil said, cutting his arm between Seth and me.

"Yeah, don't you need things carried down to the beach?" Embry asked, looking around.

"Yeah, I do. Sam's carried quite a bit so far, but you guys can handle tables and stuff, right?" Leah asked absently, looking around. "Everyone's expected to bring something to eat."

"What about the alcohol?" Bina asked.

"You drunk. I'm not expecting alcohol to be at this party." Leah replied.

"You can't have a party and not expect alcohol." Bina said, crossing her arms over her chest, sticking her bottom lip out. Leah sighed.

"All I know is, most of us won't be drinking." Leah finished the conversation with Bina by motioning us outside and into the small shed out back, where a few tables sat, propped up against the wall. Jake, Quil, Seth and Embry gathered them up and left towards the beach, and Bina, Leah and I went to Leah's room to get ready for tonight.

"Oh, I'm glad you're coming. Everyone at school misses you so much." Leah said, turning on her flat iron.

"I'm so sad that I don't get to come to school with you guys this year." I replied, digging in Leah's closet, scoping out possible outfits.

"But you're going to be here every day after school, babydoll." Bina said from Leah's bed. She sat up, and looked at us. "So don't even complain."

"Well, how was your guy's first day, any new students? Hot boys that are interested?" I asked, smiling at them.

"I got it on with Seth today in the parking lot." Bina said.

"Ew. You did not. That's disgusting." Leah said, thowing a hairbrush at Bina. She laughed, me along with her.

"Hate to admit it, but your brother is something." Bina twirled a strand of hair around her finger.

"He is a teenager, and you know what teenage boys do." I put in. I pulled out a black halter.

"You could wear that as a dress." Leah completely ignored our jibes, pointing to the clothing I had in my hand. I slipped out of my clothes and into it, turning around in the mirror.

"It looks better on you than it does me." Leah said, looking through her mirror at me, running the flat iron through her hair.

"I wish I had something lik this." I said, taking it off and putting my clothes back on. I flopped on the bed beside Bina.

"And Sam?" I asked.

"Fine as usual." Bina said absently.

"Stop answering these questions for me." Leah gave Bina a dirty look. "He's getting ready to go on his scholarship in a couple of weeks, right now we're spending every moment we can together. So if I'm not responding in the next little while, it's because of him." She smiled.

"Oh hurry up so we can leave, Leah." Bina yelled. "I want to see your brother as soon as possible."

Leah stuck her tongue out at Bina, but got up. It was so great to be back with my best friends.

"Wear jeans tonight. I'd advise it." Bina then skipped out the door after Leah. I was last to leave, and swiping the flat iron through my hair before I went down. I then followed Bina down the stairs, Leah waiting for us at the bottom.

"Yay, finally ready. Can we leave now?" Bina asked from the door.

"Yes, we'll walk down to the beach." Leah replied.

It was already starting to get dark as we made our way down towards the beach. By the time we got there, most of the people expected had arrived, music was playing and a bonfire was roaring, along with tables of food. I was left alone by Bina and Leah as they scoped the crowd, and I greeted some friends I hadn't seen for a few weeks, and some I hadn't seen since school ended for the summer.

"Bella, you're alone." Seth's voice carried to my ears from behind me. I turned around and smiled at him.

"Everyone has someone to be with." I said, laughing.

"You're never alone though." He protested, walking along with me.

"I'm just saying hi to everyone in the crowd. Don't you have a special friend you're trying to impress?" I asked him, he blushed.

"I guess so, but she's not interested." He replied. "You know what, I'm going to go get some food. I'll talk to you in a bit." And with that Seth left me alone, standing there. I sat down on a log around the fire.

"Yo Bella." Quil said, sitting down beside me, scarfing down a hotdog. "Marshmellow?" He held out his hand, covered in the sticky melted fluff.

"Er, no thanks." I replied.

"Suit yourself." He said, and stuck his hand into his mouth and chewed off the marshmellow.

"How attractive." I said sardonically.

"Mmph." He said, his mouth still full of hand.

"Hmm?"

"Thank you. It's how I get all the ladies." He said, chuckling.

"Speaking of ladies, may I take your place next to this one?" A deep voice I immediately recognized as Jake's said. I looked up into his dark, smiling face and grinned back.

"Of course." Quil said, jumping up and heading off somewhere. Jake flopped down beside me.

"Good evening, Bella." Jake said softly.

"Hello Jake. How was your afternoon?" I asked.

"It was fun, I missed you like mad though." He pressed his lips to the hollow of my cheek. My breath hitched.

"Well, good." I teased, attempting to poke his stomach. He let out a small chuckle as he caught my hand and wove his fingers through mine.

"I guess we won't be seeing each other as much." He said, frowning slightly.

"Guess that's why we'll have to make the time we do have together count." I said, puckering my lips and closing my eyes.

"You're so cheesy." Jacob laughed, putting two fingers to my lips. I opened my eyes.

"That's not what I was expecting." I said, play-pouting. He looked down at me through his lashes and leaned in.

"ALCOHOL!" Bina squealed, pushing her way between us and laying across our laps. Her drink sloshed around in the bottle.

"Really Bina? Where'd you even get that?"

"Sam's friends accept favours for ALCOHOL!"

"Favours?" I asked slowly. Her answer couldn't be too good.

"YEAHYEAHYEAGGGHHH!" She put her finger to her lips. "Shh. You can't tell anyone though." Jacob met my eyes and gave me an exasperated look. "You're not going to tell anyone, are you?" Bina asked, sounding child-like

"No, of course not."

"JACOB? Sexy Jacob. You're going to tell people." Bina accused.

"No, I won't tell anyone what you've done for alcohol." Jake shook his head.

"ALCOHOL!" She sang, then Embry walked by, which got her attention. She rolled around. "Embry!"

Embry stopped and looked towards us, shooting Jake and me a warning glance. I shrugged, and he came over.

"Oh Bina, not again." He said.

"I love you Embry!" She said, and got up, taking his arm and leading him off into the crowd.

"Oh, screw this." Jake said, getting up. He held out his hand for me to take, his dark eyes smoldering in the firelight.

"Screw what?" I asked, taking his hand. He led me off down the beach, walking in a silence, determined with his goal. He marched on, me trying to keep up, but almost failing. I stumbled a few times, and he stopped and waited for me to gain balance. Finally he seemed to reach what he was looking for, and I didn't recognize it right away, but upon closer inspection I saw our tree. Stuck in the rocks ever since we had discovered it eight years ago, we frequently came back to it. It was set up like a bench, and was great for spending days lounging at the beach, and being alone. We sat down, and he looked over the water for a few moments. I couldn't stop looking at him while he was staring, he looked at peace, and beautiful. Finally his eyes slid down and met mine. He cupped my face with both hands.

"Bella. Forget what I complained about earlier. I can't stay away from you any more than my dad can get places without his wheelchair." He stopped to chuckle at his joke. "You've been my life ever since we were young, and I'm not about to grow apart from you. I'm okay with the way things are." He rumbled, his voice low and passionate.

"Of course Jake..." I started, but his lips brushed against mine.

"We can do whatever we want. We're invincible" He whispered against my lips. "I love you Bella."

I loved how he saved telling me that he loved me for times like this. It made me feel all that much more loved, and cared about. Jake truly was an amazing person.

"I love you Jacob Black. You astound me." I said back, meaning every word of it, and slid even closer, pressing my lips to his with force.


	5. Vanished

_We made it through the awkward years when we were trying to figure out what was happening to our bodies. The constant teasing of our friends, who knew before we did. It was nature's natural course to take, we were meant to be together from the start. It took a lot of awkward glances, awkward, short conversations and many fights before we were sat down by Charlie and Billy and given the sex talk. It was uncomfortable, like wearing pants ten sizes too tight, but we made a long transition from friends to boyfriend/girlfriend and it took a long time to settle comfortably. We were still more like best friends than anything._

I ran to the phone, I had heard it ringing too late and sprinted from my room downstairs to grab it and answer the persistent caller. I slid into the kitchen with my socks and knocked the phone off of the hook. It landed on the floor along with myself as my feet slipped out from under me and fell backwards, landing right on my tailbone.

"Hello?" I managed, finally bringing my phone to my ear, sitting up on the linoleum floor. I didn't hear anything on the other end. "Hello? Is this some sort of prank, because..." I started, but stopped when I heard a sniffle.

"Hey, it's Leah." The voice on the other end said shakily, like she had been crying for a while.

"Leah, what happened?" I asked, full of concern. Leah had always been the stable one, the almost unemotional one. She was the group's rock and it unnerved me to hear her this way.

"It's Sam." She replied, her voice breaking. My body filled with dread at once. Sam had always been slightly flighty, but he was completely dedicated to and in love with Leah. He would never hurt her.

"What about Sam?" I bit my lip, almost not wanting to hear the answer.

"He... He's disappeared." She cried. "He's gone! No one knows where he is."

"Get your ass down to the reservation right now." Bina's voice yelled from the background.

"I'm coming." I replied, eyeing my bookbag. It was full of homework from every class I had today, but whatever was happening with my friends was more important for a multitude of reasons. I hung up the phone, grabbing my truck keys and wrote a note for Charlie in case I wasn't home before he was and drove out to the reservation. I pulled into Leah's driveway and jumped out of the truck, managing to trip somehow and landing on the ground, but I ignored the place where a bruise was bound to show and ran inside.

"Leah? Bina?" I called out, but there was no answer. Seth came into the foyer, hands behind his back.

"They're already out looking for him in the woods. There are search parties everywhere." He said quietly. "Leah just wanted me to wait for you. Let's get moving and look for him." He sounded determined, and I complied, allowing him to lead me out the door and onto a path leading into the woods behind the house. "I don't know where people have checked, but maybe we should go into the woods to look for him." Seth looked around him.

"Are you sure we should be wandering around on our own?" I asked, wary of the wet forest and it's inhabitants.

"Bella. You were brought up here. Don't be silly. We'll run into a whole bunch of people who are looking for him as well." Seth replied, grabbing my arm and dragging me into the brush. I looked around at the green forest as we made our way deeper into it. Seth was right, I grew up here. There was probably no chance that we would get lost.

"So, what should we do to look for him?" I asked, uncertain. "Should we call his name?"

"I guess we might every so often. But mostly we're looking for his rotting body laying under a tree." Seth replied, deadpan.

"Seth!" I yelled, swiping at his arm. He giggled.

"I'm joking. We all hope he's alive. I'm pretty sure he's just hiding or something." Seth dodged my hand, gracefully side-stepping it, and we walked on in a comfortable silence.

Seth and I walked deeper into the forest for hours, calling out Sam's name every so often. We met people from the village on our trek, but soon decided to turn around as the sun started to sink over the horizon. I felt completely safe with Seth as my companion, he was good company, and seemed to know his way around the forest. He helped me up when I fell, and waited for me to untangle my foot from brush when needed.

We broke through the forest and found ourselves on the far end of the reservation's long beach. Night had fallen early tonight and it was pitch black as we walked along the sand. There was a new moon in the sky, so it wasn't even giving off light.

"Don't you find it slightly eerie to be walking along the beach in the dark?" I asked, veering closer to Seth. Somehow, the brush of his warm arm made me feel safer.

"It's a beautiful night." Seth said, his teeth flashing in the darkness. Even if some scary monster comes at us, we'll never know." He chuckled.

"Not funny." I grumbled.

We saw light in the distance, and I had a feeling that we were nearing civilization again. As we got closer, I discovered that it was a fire, a bonfire and there was a group of people seated around it.

"Hey." Seth said as we came upon the group. Everyone seemed solemn, and sitting with long faces. "No luck?"

"None. I think we've looked everywhere. No sign of a body either." Leah replied, from right in front of us. I sat down next to her and saw that her face matched her voice. Her eyes were rimmed red from crying along with her nose and cheeks. Her eyes were bright with tears.

"Hey Leah." I said softly, putting my arm around her.

"Hey Bells. Sorry that we couldn't wait for you." She said, leaning into me.

"It's fine. Seth and I looked into the forest." I replied, hugging her tightly. After all, what were friends for, if not this?

"You got to go with Seth?" Bina leaned around Leah, smiling. "I wish I could have gone with Seth."

"What?" Seth asked from beside me, I laughed.

"Nothing." Bina laughed with me. Leah scowled over at Bina.

"It won't work. It doesn't even make me smile when Sam's not missing." Leah said scathingly. Bina put her hand over her heart in mock hurt.

"I apologize Leah. I apologize that your brother is attractive." Bina waggled her fingers down at Seth, but he wasn't listening.

"Well, do you think that we can go look now?" Leah asked, ignoring Bina and peering around at her parents.

"Leah, honey. We won't be able to see anything in the dark." Sue Clearwater looked exhausted from the days events.

"Have you been looking all day?" I asked, my jaw dropping.

"Well, yeah."

"Why didn't you call me?"

"I did."

"After school was over."

"You helped well enough."

"When did he go missing?"

"Last night, he didn't show up to my place like he said he was going to. No one's seen him since yesterday afternoon." Leah gave a great sigh, as if her fears could be expelled through her mouth.

"Bells, I didn't know you were called down here." Jake's rough voice reached my ears only seconds before his arms wound around my waist.

"Hi Jake." I smiled up at him.

"I notice you were part of the search party." He said, and when I looked at him, his eyes drooped, his expression tired.

"You guys all look exhausted." I said, leaning up and kissing him on the nose.

"You guys disgust me." Leah put in, grumbling.

"It's been a long day. I think I've been everywhere." Jake said, smiling tiredly at me, and ignoring Leah except for reaching out and ruffling her hair. She yelped in protest.

"You have to get to bed. It's too late to be searching now." I smiled, running my hand down his cheek.

"I don't.." He started, but I covered his mouth with my hand.

"I think I deserve the right to use the parent-tone every once in a while." I said, removing my hand.

"Your hand tastes awful." He said, brushing his lips against mine "Thank god you haven't fallen on your face."

"Ha. Ha." I replied, pulling away from him. I stood up, grabbing his hand and pulling him up with me. "Come on, you're going to bed." He complied,dragging along behind me. I walked around the circle to the path to the road, but a hand stopped me.

"Bella, what are you doing here?" A familiar voice asked.

"Dad!" I said, looking at the face connected to the hand. "What are you doing here?"

"The same thing you're doing here, I suppose." He replied, grinning at me.

"Right." I replied, feeling stupid. "Well, I'm getting home soon, I'm just going to walk Jake home."

"Alright, do you have your truck?" He asked.

"Yeah," I replied.

"Good. See you at home then." He waved me away and went back to his conversation with Harry. I drug Jake up the path and through the ten minute walk to his house, in which he was very quiet. The only time he ever got quiet was when he was really tired. I unlocked the door with the key under the flowerpot and lead him to his bed. He laid down without argument and I took off his shoes and shirt, then pulled the covers up over him, sinking down beside the bed on my knees.

"Goodnight Jakie." I whispered.

"Night Bells. Drive... good." He replied sleepily. He raised his head and kissed my cheek, then flopped back down and was asleep.

I stood up and smoothed back his hair. I was lucky to have someone like him, and to top it off, he was so beautiful, and looked even more so when he was sleeping. A soft snore escaped his lips as he rolled over.

"Go home Bella." He murmured. I laughed and left the house, making sure to be quiet on my way out so as to not wake him any further, if that was even possible. I met Billy wheeling up the lane.

"Hey Billy." I called out softly.

"Good evening Bella, you should get home and get to sleep." He replied, smiling.

"Do you want some help getting in and settled?" I asked, but he shook his head.

"Go home." He said firmly.

I walked down the road and over to Leah's, surprising myself with how long I could walk still. I jumped in my truck, hoping that I wasn't waking anyone with the tremendous roar of the engine. I pulled out of the driveway and went home. As I drove into my own driveway, I noticed the lights were on, which meant that Charlie was already home.

"Dad?" I called, throwing my keys on the stand beside the door.

"In here, Bella." He yeled back from the ktichen. The smell of pizza hit my nose as I entered the room.

"Hey." I said, sitting down at the table. I grabbed a slice and bit off a piece. It melted in my mouth, and until then I hadn't realized that I was ravenous. I gulped down the whole piece in less than a minute.

"You left the phone off the hook." Charlie said offhandedly.

"Oh, sorry. I thought I hung it up." I replied, grabbing another.

"You probably did. The thing falls off the hook too many times a day. Stupid old phone." He grumbled.

"Dad, I think you're a little tired too." I smiled.

"I guess I am. It's been a long day. I've been down at the reservation since six this morning." He chuckled.

"Well, I still have school tomorrow, so I think I'll head on up to bed." I went around and hugged Charlie goodnight, and looked at the clock on my way up. It was one thirty already. I sighed and flung off my clothes, not even bothering to put on pajamas and slid into bed, falling asleep almost as quickly as Jake had, a lot faster than I normally did.

I rolled over, and the sunshine from the early morning shined into my eyes. I pulled my blanket over my head trying to shut it out. I felt as if I hadn't slept at all overnight. I wearily pulled my head from the blankets and checked the digital clock. I sat straight up, suddenly feeling more awake than ever. It was just past nine o'clock. I was definitely late. I showered quickly, pulling my hair into a braid and pulling some clean clothes on. I brushed my teeth, grabbed my bookbag and a banana from the counter before stopping short at the note on the table. It was signed by Charlie, pardoning me from being late this morning, I had been involved in the search for Sam Uley. There was a five dollar bill next to it, and I grabbed the money and note and tore out to the truck.

I got to school, in the same amount of time as I always had, my truck wasn't about to go any faster just because I was late. and I ran into the front office, thrusting my note at Mrs. Cope. She took it calmly and read it, her eyes widening slightly. She looked up at me after seeming to have read it a few times.

"You were a friend of Sam Uley?" She asked.

"Yeah, you heard he disappeared?" I asked, confused. It wasn't published in any newspaper.

"Yes, it's been all over town. You are excused, hun. Go on to your second class." She said, quickly writing an excuse and handing it to me. "Bless your heart. I hope he's found."

I walked outside and over to building 3, where Government was being taught, and when I stepped in, everyone in that class turned around and gaped at me. I gave a small wave and handed my late slip to the teacher, who looked at it and went on teaching. I sat down in the empty seat in the middle of a row by the windows. The sky was grey, and there was a lot of fog, which made looking outside totally unappealing, just like the class.

The rest of the morning dragged on. I tried to pay attention in Trigonometry and Spanish, but I kept drifting off to sleep, and jerking myself awake. I definitely needed more sleep. I was relieved when the gargling bell rang, signaling lunch. I walked into the cafeteria, looking at all of the students, milling around and talking. It was loud, but it would keep me awake. I got in line, planning on having a solitary lunch, but those hopes were shattered when the excited voice behind me invaded my ears, along with a tap on the shoulder.

"Bella! You looked so tired this morning. You must have had a late night, I've heard all about it. It's been going around the school, are you alright?"


	6. Convene

_I held onto Jake, I was afraid that if I let him go, he'd crumble to pieces on me. I squeezed with all my might, knowing that he'll never been the same without his Mom, who I'd loved as much as he did. I could feel the pain that he felt, and I could feel the pure pain that was emanating through his skin. I looked up into his young face, trembling with hurt and grief. The tears threatening to spill over. I kissed him on his soft cheek, a friendly, understanding, wet child kiss. The tears finally started to run down his cheeks in giant drops and he threw his arms around me for comfort. We were two children grieving over the death of a parent, and we would support each other through our mourning. _

Jessica invited me to sit with her and her friends, and I complied. Even though I was grossly tired and I didn't feel like talking, I followed her to the table with my apple and milk.

"Guys. You know Bella." Jessica said, smiling at the group of people.

"Hey Bella!" Was the general, excited reply. I sat down, and smiled at the group.

"Hello group." I said, smiling. Jessica sat down beside me and started chattering on.

"Oh Bella, I heard about it, and how people were out looking all day and into the night. Were you one of them? They say that he got eaten by something, but I don't believe it. A Quileute hardly ever goes missing. He may have gone on vacation or something!" She said brightly. I nodded in reply.

"He was a friend of mine, my friends boyfriend." I said, frowning.

"Thats so sad." A girl at the table put in. "I'm sorry if he's dead." She didn't sound sorry at all.

"That was so mean!" Jessica cried at the girl. "You're so insensitive!" The girl only scowled blatantly, at me.

"It's fine. I know he's not dead." I replied, looking down at my apple.

"I'll introduce you to everyone." Jessica said cheerfully, trying to change the mood, and topic. "This is Mike, Ben, Angela, Eric, Lauren, Tyler and Connor." She pointed at everyone in correspondance, and they smiled and waved, or gave a small 'hi'.

"Hi all," I said, but I'd already met Eric and Mike. Eric waved heartily at me.

"I notice you've been sitting by yourself, or in your truck at lunchtime for the past couple of weeks. You can sit with us anytime you want to. I think you're just shy." Jessica said, smiling at me.

"I don't think I make new friends easily. I've lived on the reservation all my life." I said, smiling back.

"So, why are you not.. you know, Native?" Tyler asked, raising an eyebrow, that earned a smack from Jessica.

"I don't think you're allowed to ask stuff like that!" She hissed.

"It's fine." I laughed. "I've just lived on the reservation, I'm nowhere near being Quileute."

"Oh. Okay." Tyler said stupidly, blushing, and I sighed. All of this questioning and interrogation was starting to get to me. Jake would be proud that I sat with a group of people at lunch. I smiled despite myself.

"See, we're okay people." Angela put in softly from the other side of me. I smiled at her.

"You guys aren't totally crazy." I laughed

The group started packing up their garbage, and I noticed how fast that lunch had gone by. I looked at my untouched food, and threw the milk out, stuffing my apple into a front pocket of my bookbag and followed the group out.

"What do you have next?" Jessica bounced beside me.

"Biology." I replied after grabbing my schedule from my back pocket.

"I have that class next!" Mike put in, stepping back to walk on the other side of me.

"I do too," Angela said from the other side of Jessica.

"I don't." Jessica sighed and leaped off after Lauren. "Later guys!"

Angela, Mike and I headed off to the Biology building, Mike chattering about planning a trip to the beach sometime soon. I nodded and put in the right enthusiasm, but when we got inside the classroom, I stopped, mouth hanging in shock, and Angela ran into me.

"Sorry." I mumbled to Angela, red creeping up my cheeks. But I couldn't stop staring. At my previously empty bench, there was a quiet boy sitting, staring out the window. I shuffled over and sat down beside him in the chair.

"Hello." I said pleasantly. His head turned slightly towards me, his eyes flickering over my face. "I see we're now partners."

"Yes." He replied shortly, his eyes stopping on my own. I stared back at him, into his weirdly golden eyes. I noticed that he was attractive by conventional means; quite attractive to most people. He had messy bronze hair, a square jaw but sickly pale skin. The bags under his eyes forced me to look away from him. I convinced myself to look back, and I noticed he was leaning away from me, fist clenched and head turned. I turned away from this strange person and looked down at the sheet Mr. Banner had passed out, and began labelling the diagram.

For the rest of the period, I saw the pale boy looking at me, and felt the icy tension emanating off of him. I ignored him for the most part, not knowing what I did to set him off, but not really caring. He could be as frosty as he wanted to be. I couldn't wait for this class to be over. I sat through the rest of the period, trying to pass time, listeing to Mr. Banner talk and copying notes.

When the bell rang finally, he was out the door before I had closed my binder. Mike came up to my desk, leaning against it and staring after the strange person who I had the luck to sit by.

"What was with your moment right at the first of class?" He asked, twisting his face with confusion.

"I don't know, but he's not very sociable." I replied, picking up my bookbag. We had Gym to go through next.

"He just stared at you the whole time. He didn't even introduce himself." Mike replied, frowning. "I would have been nice enough to introduce myself." I laughed out loud, causing him to look at me.

"I think you already have that covered and have since the first day of school." I said, grinning at him.

"Well, yeah. It shows I'm nice." He said, and I left to the locker room.

Gym went none too quickly, we played badminton, and showing my lack of talent in the area of sports, I stayed at the back of the court, and waited out the time until school was over. It felt like a long amount of time, but the final bell rang and I changed and sprinted out to my truck, not even bothering with my raincoat. I tore out of the parking lot and headed down to the reservation. The clouds blocked out any trace of sun, and the air was filled with a fine mist, soaking everything around the area. If I was to trek through the forest today, it wasn't going to be very pleasant. I pulled my truck along the side of the road, certain that no one was going to steal it, and got out of the truck, flipping the hood of my raincoat up. I started walking down the road to the beach, not knowing where to look for my friends first.

I saw a figure jogging down the road towards me. I squinted through the mist, trying to determine who it was, but I couldn't see anything until he was about twenty feet from me. The familiar face was still sprinting towards me.

"Jake!" I cried, holding out my arms. He caught me mid-stride and swung me up, lifting me up off the ground as he came to a halt. He squeezed me to his chest and I put my own arms around him.

"I missed you." He murmured into my hair, leaning only inches back and covering my face with soft kisses. "I'm sorry that we didn't get to be together any yesterday."

"Searching for Sam was a lot more important for the community." I replied, melting into his embrace.

"I'm still sorry." His dark brown eyes caught mine, and softened. He set me back down on the pavement, and cupped my face in his large hand. His hair was soaked and droplets of rain were running down his face. My heart stuttered in my chest.

"So any luck looking?" I blurted out, and he straightened back up. His hand slid down and wove through mine. I responded by squeezing his palm tightly.

"No, and everyone is sympathetic, but they think he's dead, or gone. Leah's family and few close, outside people are still looking around." He replied, walking down the wet road.

"Did you go to school today?" I looked up at him, and he smiled down at me.

"No, but everyone understands." He said. "One of us has gone missing. They cancelled school so we could look. But the weather's awful." He looked into the grey sky, then veered off the road and into one of the many worn pathways in the small area.

"Where are we going?" I asked cautiously, stepping into the wet growth.

"Where do you think we're going?" He asked softly.

"Are we searching for Sam?" I guess, and he looked back at me.

"We're going into the forest." He stated, quite obviously.

I stayed silent as he led me further into the forest, stopping at a place where the trees started to get larger and the brush thicker. He suddenly swirled around and scooped me up and back me into a tree.

"We're going into the forest?" I asked, giggling.

"Well, we did." He smiled back at me, and brushed some stray hair off of my forehead and lowered my hood.

"I like your new look." I looked up into his dark face, and ran my hands through his wet hair. He shook it off like a dog, droplets of water landing on my face, I ran my hands down across his chest and noticed he was only wearing a light sweater, and looked back up at him. With one arm, he lifted me against the tree and I wrapped my legs around his waist. I leaned up towards him, but couldn't quite reach, I was still too short to reach his lips, but before I could say anything about it, his mouth covered mine, and my breath caught in my throat. I opened my mouth to his, our tongues dancing, meeting, once again after being parted for far too long. It made me think of how I could spend all day kissing Jake, and he'd probably allow it as well. My body tingled everywhere his body touched mine, and doubled as his body pressed me against the tree. I felt his body shivering against mine, probably from the cold rain, but he'd never admit it. I slipped my hand under his sweater and shirt and pressed my hand against his warm stomach. His stomach jerked from my cold hands and I wrapped my arms around him, pulled him in closer, if possible. His body pressed up tighter to mine and his hand slipped under my own shirt, sliding up under my bra and fingering the clasp.

"Excuse us, we aren't interrupting or anything, are we?" Came a voice from somewhere off to the side. I pulled away from Jake and looked to where the voice was coming from. Quil and Embry stood, arms crossed. Quil was trying to keep a striaght face, looking at us.

"Damnit guys." Jake said, pulling me away from the tree and slowly setting me down. He brought my hand up and kissed my fingerstips gingerly before wrapping his arms around me. I still felt his body quivering against me own and I snuggled in closer.

"Well, the searching for Sam seems to be going well." Quil chuckled, and Jake sighed.

"So I took a break." He scowled.

"A much needed one." Embry replied, sagging against a tree. "I'm exhausted. Leah had us out half the night and up early this morning."

"I know." Quil put in. "I just want to be someplace warm today." He wrapped his arms around himself and shivered, even bundled up in a wool hat and a large raincoat.

"Why don't we all take a break in Jake's shed and just hang out?" I asked, it sounded like such a good idea. The search for Sam seemed a little hopeless at the moment.

"Great, but we should go look for Bina and Seth." Embry agreed, turning around.

"What about Leah?" I asked as we followed them on the path.

"Leah's been a real downer lately." Embry replied, shrugging. He was directly in front of me, which made it easier for me to reach out and smack him.

"What? Bella? What was that for?" Embry said, looking back at me, wounded.

"Why do you think she's a downer lately?" I asked, mocking him.

"You can be some dumb sometimes." Quil said, tutting at Embry.

"Hey guys!" Bina said, skipping towards us, suddenly appearing out of the bushes.

"Bina!" I greeted, waving over Embry's head.

"I see you've found the happy couple." She said, grinning over at Jake and I.

"Leah let you and Seth go off alone together?" Jake asked, nodding at Seth following behind Bina.

"Leah trusts me." Bina smiled largely at Jake.

"What about me?" Seth put in, completely missing the jokes about him, once again.

"Nothing pumpkin." Bina replied, squeezing Seth's cheek.

"Say, we're headed over to Jake's house for a snack and a break." Embry said, "Care to come with?"

"Sure, we're in." Seth nodded.

"Whoa, wait. A snack?" Jake put in, "I didn't say anything about snacks."

"It's fine. I'm starved." I said up to Jake, rubbing my stomach.

"I'll feed you." Jake replied, kissing my nose. "Just not them."

"I'm hungry!" Embry protested.

"I'll see what I can do." Jake replied, smiling.

The six of us walked through the wet forest, the rest of them joking around. I leaned into Jake as we walked, enjoying the closeness of his body after what felt like a long time. We broke through the trees, and not too much farther along we found the truck, where we all clambered in and made it to Jake's house in no time at all. Jake threw some wood into the small stove and I grabbed a bag of bread, mustard, mayonnaise, some ham slices and a knife from the kitchen of Jake's house. The shed was just starting to warm up as I walked back in with the food, and everyone had pulled up a stump. I sat down next to Jake on a handmade bench: just a plank of wood nailed on two stumps, and listened to everyone talking, and enjoying themselves around the warm stove. This was just like most of our evenings before I had moved. I didn't realize how much I missed it. It felt like I was part of a movie scene, and I smiled up at Jake, kissing what I could reach of his jaw. It was such a perfect scene.


	7. Congruous

_Jacob seemed to have a great fondness for the forest. We constantly walked back and revelled in the joys of being so close and being in the wild as well. We were gone for hours, sometimes the whole day. He got excited there, and it was where we shared our first kiss. We had been walking for hours, and we were almost near the cliffs that some people jumped off of for recreation. He smiled over at me: not so much taller than I yet, and I smiled back. He reached into his pocket and pulled out a small, crumpled flower he had obviously found while we were walking. He stepped close, handing it to me and looking quite proud of himself. I grinned up at him and took advantage of the closeness, leaning forward and giving him a peck on the lips. It surprised us both and I saw his russet coloured face flushing dark red, his eyes wide and mouth gaping. _

Nine days after he disappeared so suddenly, he was back. Sam had walked into the reservation, and pretended like he'd never left. There were a lot of things different about him though. His hair was cropped close to his head, he had grown about a foot and muscles had suddenly appeared where there had only been a hint of them before. He was suddenly walking around in only cut off shorts and a grim face. He seldom smiled anymore, and it was more often than not that you saw Leah hiding behind large sunglasses in the pouring rain. He didn't talk to the rest of us anymore, except for a curt nod and when he saw us, he always cast a wary and tired glance at Jake, like he knew something that we didn't. I spent every day down there, sometimes consoling Leah, most of the time with Jake, along with Embry, Bina and Quil. Seth was also fast becoming a constant in our small group of friends.

But I always had to come back to Forks, where I now lived, so close, yet so far away from the reservation. School was becoming a waiting period for me to go down to the reservation and see my friends. Mike had invited me to a party at his house, but I declined because there was a large gathering for Sam and the rejoice that he wasn't dead. Jessica and Lauren asked me to go shopping with them in Port Angeles, which I declined as well, stating that I didn't have time for it. My Biology classes were almost a relief, my mysterious and weird partner had disappeared since the one day he had showed up and I had the bench to myself to think and concentrate on Biology. It was fast becoming my favorite subject.

I walked into Biology and was already having a bad day. I had woken up late, gotten late to school, dropped my homework in one of the puddles in the parking lot and had bumped into many people on my way to classes. The teachers, it seemed, had chosen today to pick on me for answers and catching me when I wasn't paying attention. Now, here to top off my day, he was back, sitting like he was the first time I saw him: stiff and unwelcoming.

"Wow." Mike said from behind me, quite close to my ear. I could feel his hot breath prickle it. "He's back." I had to get away from Mike's closeness.

"Oh enough." I threw back, and went to sit at my bench. I subtley pulled the chair to the outer edge of the bench and sat down at it, and dug out my work. Mr. Banner handed out a diagram to fill in; we were now working on the digestive system and I started filling in what I knew right away.

"Hello." My partner said softly. I looked at him, surprised. "I'm sorry that I didn't get the chance to introduce myself last time." He stared into my eyes, as if trying to convey a message to me. But it kind of gave me a chill that made its way down my spine.

"Well, it's alright." I replied, looking back down at my paper, then flipping through my textbook for answers.

"My name is Edward." He said after a few minutes, his voice smooth.

"Bella." I said curtly, not even glancing at him. There was another silence. If he could be icy, so could I. He waited a few more moments before speaking.

"What did you get for number 17?" He leaned slightly over towards my paper.

"Bile duct." I looked at his. It had already been filled out except for two.

"Wow, how did you do that so fast?" I asked leaning over to his, then looking at mine, where I had filled in seven.

"I've studied the digestive system before." He said nonchalantly.

"But you didn't know seventeen and twenty one?" They were two of the small list of ones I had. I frowned at him. He shrugged in reply.

"I hear that you're new here." His musical voice was almost persuading me to change the topic.

"Only in from the reservation." I sighed.

"What is it?"

"It's nothing, it's just that's what everyone's been asking. I guess that's what you get for being new meat. But I hadn't seen you around before a couple of weeks ago."

"I moved in from Alaska." He said.

"Wow, that's pretty far from here. Didn't you find it cold?" I asked, "I guess Forks is quite the change for you."

"No, you get used to the cold, and Forks isn't that different. I have lived here before."

"Oh, you're moving back." I gave him a small smile.

"Yes, and you've lived here all your life." He replied, looking straight at me, his eyes seeming to probe my face again, and he looked confused, like something about me perplexed him.

"Well, yes. I did say that, didn't I?" I said.

"Are we done filling in the diagram?" Mr. Banner's voice broke into our tense conversation. He leaned in between us and looked at our finished papers. "Wow, I guess you have." He muttered and left to the desk behind us. I didn't have anything else to keep me busy, so I started doodling on the paper. I could feel his eyes on me, making me feel squirmy. He didn't say anything for the rest of the class, and I didn't encourage him to say anything either.

The village was buzzing and wild with excitement and gossip when I got there this afternoon. As soon as I stepped out of my truck, Jake was there, arm looping around my waist as he said hello. Quil and Embry following behind him. Jake's eyes were dark as he looked out towards the center of the reservation.

"Hey, what happened here that's so exciting?" I asked curiously. Quil and Embry only stared at me silently.

"Not exciting really." He answered, and that was all he said about it.

I stared up at Jake, his constant smile was gone, replaced by a frown and a dark mood. The curiosity over what was going on was overwhelming and I stepped away from Jake and started heading down the road.

"Wait! Where are you going?" Jake took easy, long strides after me, catching up in no time.

"To find Bina." I replied. "Embry, do you know where Bina is?"

"No." He replied sullenly. I kept walking. Luckily, I ran into Bina in front of the convenience store not too far away. She danced over to us, as graceful as ever and gave me a bear hug.

"Bella! I missed you!" She grinned. I could feel the happiness radiating off of her where Jake was lacking today.

"Hey Bine." I smiled at her, her dark face beaming.

"Why the sullen group?" She asked, looking around at them.

"I don't know, they won't tell me." I shrugged. If Bina knew, I was positive that she would tell me, and I wasn't wrong.

"Guess what I saw today walking down the road?" She said, but didn't wait for me to respond. Her voice dropped tone. "Sam is no longer solo. I saw him walking with Jared following him. He looks the same, with short hair-" She stopped suddenly, gaping over in the distance.

Sam and Jared were walking towards us and Bina was right. They looked almost the same, with shorn hair and sudden large muscles. They were only wearing cutoffs and as they got closer, there was a hard look to their eyes. Sam was the leader of the two, Jared about a step and a half behind him. They walked with purpose, like there was something that they were supposed to do. Bina giggled.

"Welcome La Push's gang." She whispered. I laughed out loud and Sam and Jared's heads snapped towards me.

"La Push with a gang?" I whispered back. Sam got closer and folded his arms over his chest.

"Problem here?" He asked, his voice deep and commanding respect. He suddenly made Jake, who was over six feet and had a wiry, strong frame, look very small.

"We're not doing anything wrong." Jake's voice had a hard and protective edge to it. They nodded and kept walking, but I caught the look that he gave Jake before turning and going. It was almost contemptuous.

"Bella, I thought maybe we could go to your house today." Jake was suddenly behind me. I turned around into his solid, wiry chest, completely forgetting my reply.

"Uh-huh." I said weakly.

"Great." He replied, suddenly swinging me up over his shoulder into a fireman's carry. I waved goodbye to Bina, Embry and Quil as he ran down the road. He threw me into the truck and got in after me, starting it up and backing it out of the driveway. I sat up and scooched over to the middle, and cuddled into him chest. He drove down the road, silently cursing the speed limit the truck imposed, but his mood lightened the farther we got from the reservation, returning to its normal sun-like warmth.

The house was empty when we got there, as Charlie was still at work. I unlocked the door and we headed inside, flopping down on the couch in the living room and turning on a tv-movie that normally would have just been a noise in the background.

"You know," I said, my head in Jake's lap. "It's been a while since we've just hung out alone like this."

"It has. But we're here now, aren't we?" He was playing with a piece of my hair and tickled my nose with it. I swatted it away, but enjoyed the almost peacefulness of the afternoon. "By the way, this movie sucks."

"You picked it out." I countered, poking him in the ribs. He tried to squirm away. This evolved into a full-on tickling war, in which I jumped around the living-room, trying to tickle Jake without him getting back at me, but in the end, he caught me and had me pinned on the floor, shaking his hair in my face and tickling my most vulnerble spots.

The door opened as I was howlng with laughter and Jake was laughing evilly. Charlie called out and Jake stopped, bouncing up and out into the hallway to greet Charlie. I was right after him.

"Hey kids, I had no idea that you'd be home tonight." He smiled at the two of us. Jake, he's always considered a son. "Do you want me to order out?"

"No, that's alright Dad. I can fix supper." I replied, heading out to the kitchen. I grabbed some hamburger and threw together some meatloaf, shoving it into the oven and turning to Jake, who was sitting at the table, waiting patiently. I smiled over at him and he followed me up into my bedroom, going in ahead of me and laying down on the bed, legs dangling off. I crawled up and laid down beside him.

"How was your day?" Jake asked, putting his arm around me.

"Well, you remember that guy that I told you about. He was back in Bio today. His name's Edward. Kind of weird." I said, thinking back to my day.

"Oh really?" Jake raised an eyebrow. "Is he as stunning as I am?" He joked. I swatted him.

"Don't be silly. Not by a long shot." I stuck my tongue out at him. "Along with that, it was a pretty bad day overall." I sighed.

"Well, my day was pretty fantastic." Jake looked at me with a mock smug look.

"I'm glad." I replied darkly, narrowing my eyes at him.

"Yes, it was happy with sunshine and butterflies and rainbows!" He raised his hands into the air and fluttered them around.

"You're retarded." I replied, laughing at him, trying to take advantage of his distracted state and attempted to push him off the bed with both my arms and legs. His arms flailed even more than before as he slid off and tried to grab onto something. His eyes widened impossibly as he wasn't expecting it. I laughed hysterically as he landed on the floor with a large thump.

After he got over the shock of being thrown on the floor, he tried to get up and I paused in my laughing fit to try to push him over again, but he wasn't having it. A feral growl escaped from low in his throat as he pounced back up onto my bed, and I tried to squirm away as he swung out a hand at me, but he caught me and swung me under him, and I squealed out in surprise.

"Bella?" Charlie called up, sounding worried, and Jake stopped at once, leaning back onto his heels.

"Yeah dad?" I yelled back.

"I think the meatloaf is burning." He replied, and Jake chuckled. I sprinted out the door and downstairs to check it. Charlie had turned on the potatoes. They were cooked, along with the meatloaf, and I pulled it out of the oven, opened the drawer, grabbed the potato masher and flung it at Jake with surprising grace. He caught it by the handle and I slid the pot towards him and flung the strainer into the sink.

"Wow." I said, shocked at how well that had worked out.

"That was impressive." Jake's eyebrows disappeared under his long bangs.

I took the meatloaf out of the dish and put it on a plate. All of a sudden my graceful streak ended when I grabbed the casserole dish and turned around, too fast. The glass dish slipped out of my hands and flung across the room, landing against the wall and bouncing down to the floor.

"Well, of course that would happen." Jake said from the counter. I grabbed the dishcloth and wiped the grease from the wall, picking up the dish, surprisingly still in one piece. I carefully put it in the sink and leaned against the counter where Jake was mashing the potatoes. He launched into a story about Embry's attempt to ask out a senior's girlfriend and almost getting beat up, if it wasn't for his smooth talking.

We all sat down at the table and Jake and Charlie talked about Billy and Harry Clearwater and fishing, the weather and some about sports. I ate in silence, listening to their animated conversation, watching Jake. The smooth, unblemished skin puffed out as he chewed, his strong jaw working the food.

"Bella, this is delicious." Charlie cut off from his conversation with Jake and turned to me.

"Oh, thanks Dad." I replied, giving him a small smile. "It's nothing special really." I looked from him to Jake, both looking at me. Jake had tied his hair back with an elastic.

"Everything you do is special." Charlie chuckled, leaning over and messing up my hair. I leaned back from the unexpected show of affection.

"Um, thanks?" I tried to smile my way out of this, showing a lot of teeth. Jake said something and he turned back to him.

We finished our supper and Charlie settled in the living room as Jake and I washed the supper dishes and left to drop Jake off at his house. I said hello to Billy and we headed into his bedroom, where after the long day, we just laid down in his bed, eyes closed, lights off, me nestled in as close to his body as I could get. We talked for a couple of minutes, then were silent for a few more in a pattern of silence and conversation. It was nice to escape from everything else, school, Sam, our friends, Charlie, life and just be Jake and Bella, Bella and Jake in our own small world at the moment. There was no way I could explain the way I loved being with him.


	8. Tarnished

**Here it is!  
It's been quite the week, busy and all that.  
Enjoy, or don't. That might be sadistic.**

_Rachel used to steal me away and force me to sit in her room for hours while she did makeovers on me, and tested her makeup. She designed and fashioned runway outfits and made me model them, doing my makeup and making me walk in front of the whole family. Jacob found it hilarious, as did the rest of the family. I was forced to do this until her obsession with fashion wore off- it lasted for about two years. Two years of modelling for me, and endless hours of embarassment. In retrospect, I should have enjoyed it. Rachel moved away after Sarah died, and we seldom see her. I should have enjoyed the closeness, but I hated playing dressup, and being a doll for Rachel at the time._

"Wake up, Bella. Wake up." The warm voice came flooding into my dream. Then I was jarred awake and found myself looking into Jake's brown eyes.

"Hi..Jake?" I said, confused. His broad lips broke out into a grin.

"You fell asleep here. Your Dad's been calling." His voice was husky with sleep as he sat up. His shirt had found its way off his body throughout the night and his muscles rippled in his chest as he scooted over to me. I remembered laying down in the dark with him last night and then drifting off, but trying to keep myself awake, but losing the battle.

"I'm going to be late for school, aren't I?" I sighed, sitting up with him. I took his large hand in both of mine.

"Of course not. I woke you up early enough." He leaned over and gave me a quick kiss on my mouth. "Now you have to go home though. I'm sorry."

"It's alright, I'll see you later?" I asked, pulling myself off the bed. Jake followed me out.

"I dont know, most likely." Jake said thoughtfully. "I may be busy tonight though."

"Alright. I-"

"You'll eat some breakfast, won't you?" Jake asked, but didn't wait for an answer. He grabbed an egg from the fridge, a bowl and Bisquik from the cupboard. He mixed everything together and put it on the frying pan, while I sat down at the table. He turned towards me and smiled, sitting down in a chair next to me, bringing it over close.

"So what are you going to be up to tonight?" I asked curiously, laying my hand on his forearm. I felt him flex under my touch.

"Quil and Embry want me tonight." Jake smiled, laying his hand over mine.

"For some man on man, I mean.. Man to man time?" I teased him, he chuckled.

"Something good and clean." He replied, tweaking my nose.

"Well, that sounds fun." I grinned back. He got up to flip the pancakes and stayed there until they were done. Minutes later, he placed a stack of pancakes on the table in front of me, and an even bigger one in front of himself. He handed me a fork and some real maple syrup.

"Eat up." He said cheerfully.

"Why thank you, Mr. Black." I replied before digging in.

"How come you don't hang out with anyone from school?" He asked, a couple minutes later through a mouthful of chewed-up pancake.

"Because I've got my friends here?" I fired back.

"You can never have too many friends." He pointed his fork at me. I only looked at him.

"Anyway, they are my friends from school." I narrowed my eyes. He laughed at me.

"Okay, okay." He agreed, he leaned over the table and gave me a sticky kiss.

"I'll go get ready for school." I said, scraping up the last bit of the pancakes off the plate and shoving them in my mouth. I stood up and went around the table, falling into his long open arms before heading out the door.

I drove my truck home and jumped in the shower, letting my hair hang in loose waves, brushing my teeth and throwing on some clean clothes. I grabbed my bookbag and drove to the school, getting there just in time. I ran into the school and into English class, where Mike had a seat saved for me.

"Bonjourno." Mike said as I sat down.

"This is english class." I replied, dropping my bookbag.

"I'm trying to be culturally aware." Mike retorted.

"Okay, whatever." I replied, but couldn't keep myself from grinning. I put my hand over my mouth to hide it.

"Ah, the first smile of the day. Always the best." He said, looking at me, smiling himself.

"Enjoy it. It's a rare thing." I teased.

"Shall I get my binoculars." He said, and I found myself laughing at his lame joke. I was feeling weirdly cheerful today, I didn't know what was coming over me. It might have been that Jake pointed out that I didn't really socialize here. "Wow, I didn't expect you to even smile at that, let alone laugh at it." Mike looked proud of himself. I scoffed at him before turning and listening to the teacher, ending our conversation.

The morning flew by, and I found myself being very outgoing to people, and talking my head off to Jessica. Lunchtime came and I sat at the small table again, laughing with them, squashed between Angela and Mike.

"I still think that when he fell on his way over to the board was the best." Jessica laughed.

"No way, he said 'um' and 'like' so many times. Like 300." Mike put in.

"He's just awful." Lauren sneered from her spot across the table.

"I'm sorry they're such fools." Angela smiled apologetically at me.

"It's alright, they're funny." I replied, smiling back.

"No, wait." Jessica cut Angela off, touching the tips of her fingers to my hand, trying to get my attention. "Mike's having a party tonight, Bella. You have to come." She wiggled her eyebrows at me.

"Yes Bella! Come have fun with us." Tyler said excitedly.

"I know it's a school night, but it's nothing big. Just some friends hanging out." Mike said. I thought it over, and figured that I was having such a great day, why shouldn't I go?

"Yeah, alright." I agreed, and most of the table cheered.

"I can't believe she accepted!" Eric said, laughing.

"I can't believe it! I'm so excited!" Jessica shrieked, then grabbed my hand. "You're actually coming."

"All this time, we thought you were a loner." Lauren glanced over. I gave her a tight smile.

"Like when she first came here." Eric said.

"We totally wanted to get to know you." Tyler said.

"We couldn't find you though. You were almost like a loner." Jessica added, and I felt Mike move his leg over so that it was against mine. I moved even closer towards Angela, almost squishing her against Eric.

"Sorry." I whispered to her.

"I understand." She whispered back, her mouth barely moving.

"Hey guys!" Ben shoved a tray in and squeezed in between Angela and Eric. I felt Angela squirm next to me.

"Hey Ben, guess whats going down at my house tonight?" Mike asked, giving him a highfive.

"Party at Mikes?" Ben laughed, returning it.

"You know it." Eric put in.

"And Bella's coming." Mike put his arm around me.

"Whoa, really ?" Ben looked at me, eyebrows raised. I gave him a small smile, while trying to politely find a way away from Mike's arm. He gave me a one armed hug before dropping his arm.

"Yeah, I might show up." I said coyly at Ben.

"No. no. She said she'd definitely come." Tyler put in.

"Okay guys, enough talking about me." I said, making the 'that's final' gesture with my hands. I could feel my cheeks heating up at the inevitable blush. They laughed at me.

"Did you see the sub we had for government?" Ben asked, and I sighed in relief as the guys started up again to make fun of the poor guy.

"Bell." Eric said, turning his ear towards the door.

"What?" I asked, but then understood. The bell had just rang, and I had to go to Biology. To Edward the Ice King. I got up and picked up my bookbag, Angela on one side of me, Mike on the other, chatting about tonight. I walked in the classroom and sat next to Edward.

"Hello." He said softly, as I sat down.

"Hey." I replied, getting out my binder. Mr. Banner started right in on the class, going through a powerpoint, droning on, and reminding us to take notes.

"How are you?" He whispered. I looked at him, confused.

"I'm good..." I replied.

"You look well rested." He observed, and I cast him another confused glance.

"I slept well last night." I whispered back. He nodded and I kept on writing.

That's how the rest of the class went. He kept asking me questions, and I'd answer them. He didn't pry into my life, or ask anything too deep, but it was a different question each time, and he kind of made me feel at ease, even if I couldn't forget our first encounter. It kept replaying in my head as I saw him looking at me, and there was always an avid curiosity in his golden eyes when I lifted mine to his.

When the bell rang, I jumped up, shoving my binder and pen into my bookbag. I think I heard him utter a soft 'goodbye' before he left the room. Mike showed up next to me to walk to Gym together.

"Everytime you go to Bio, he stares at you. It's kind of creepy." He commented.

"Did you invite him to your gathering tonight?" I asked, curious. But a small 'pfft' sound escaped his lips.

"No one ever invites the Cullens to anything." Mike replied.

"The Cullens?" I asked. There was more than one, apparently. Jessica ran up to us as we were walking across the path to the Gym building. Her cheeks were flushed and there was rain gathered on her hair. She looked gorgeous, making me feel slightly self-concious beside her.

"Bella just asked about the Cullens." Mike laughed, almost bitterly.

"What about them?" Jessica asked, her eyes bright.

"She doesn't know about them." Mike replied.

"Oh, well. Nobody does really. They don't take enough notice of anybody for anyone to be their friend. They stay in their small group." Jessica said. "Especially Edward."

"She had a thing for Edward once, completely rejected her." Mike murmured to me.

"I didn't ask him out!" Jessica retorted.

"There's more than just Edward?" I cut in.

"Yeah, there's five of them. But they're all, like.. together. I mean, its not weird, cause they're adopted. Dr. Cullen and his wife are like matchmakers. Rosalie and Jasper Hale are twins, and Rosalie's with Emmett Cullen, Jasper is with Alice Cullen. Edward's the only single one." Jessica rolled her eyes to show that she didn't care.

"Oh, she's finding out about the Cullens." Angela said from behind me.

"Yes, she didn't even notice them before." Jessica said wildly.

"Except Edward, Edward is with her in Biology. He talks to her." Mike sounded appalled.

"He talks to you?" Jessica's voice went up quite a few decibals.

"We'll have to talk about this later. We'll be late." Angela said urgently, then drug Jessica off to another building. Mike and I headed over to Gym, where I waited out the hour until it was over. Today we were playing soccer, and I pretended to be defense, to get out of any actual playing. I was happy when the bell rang, and I changed and walked out the door.

"Bella, you haven't changed your mind or anything, have you?" Mike said, running up behind me. He sounded really worried. I smiled reassuringly at him and shook my head.

"I'm still coming." I said. He let out a sigh of relief, the wrinkles in his forehead disappearing. "Don't even worry about it." I said, getting into my truck. He waved and was loped off towards his car.

I went home and did all of the homework that I needed to do, waiting out the time before I would go to Mikes. I was starting to get jittery, and I felt the butterflies in my stomach from the nervousness. I threw on a different outfit and sat in the chair in the living room, watching tv to get my mind off of it. The phone rang, and I jumped up in relief, running to answer it.

"Hello?" I asked into the receiver.

"Hey Bells! Get yourself over here to Mike's house, we're getting ready over here. I guess it's supposed to be pretty big tonight."

"Alright, I'll be over in a few minutes." I replied. Then Jessica hung up. I wrote Charlie a note, explaining where I'd be and found myself at Mike's house before I knew it. I knocked on the door, and Jessica opened it up, a huge smile on her face.

"Come on in, you don't have to knock! We're all friends here." She grabbed my hand and pulled me inside and up the stairs into what I guess was Mike's room. A mirror was propped up on the computer desk and girl accessories, such as a straightener, tons of makeup, hairbrushes, combs, bobby pins, sprays, mousse, among other things were scattered around it. Other than that, there was a bed with a dark blue comforter on it, and a corner with plane mobiles. I was surprised not to see posters of half naked girls, but there was a bookshelf filled with books and a couple of NASCAR things. scattered about. It was strangely clean.

"Oh, Bella. That outfit is really cute." Jessica cooed. "We don't even need to change you!" She sat me down on the office chair."We'll straighten your hair and give you some makeup. Girl, you're already pretty, but we should try it."

"Well, alright." I complied as Jessica attacked my hair and Angela started in on my makeup.

Mike wandered in through the middle of it with a plate of cupcakes, and laid on his bed.

"Oh Mike. You just reminded me!" Jessica squealed suddenly, pulling on a piece of my hair.

"Ouch." I jerked away.

"Sorry Bella. I just remembered about what we were talking about earlier before we were almost late for class." Jessica stepped around so that I could see her and smiled.

"Edward talks to you?" Jessica asked again, trying to take up the conversation from earlier.

"Yeah, but the first time he just ignored me and like, leaned away from me." I said, twisting my face. Angela frowned.

"And then?" Jessica encouraged.

"Then after he came back, he introduced himself and he's been talking ever since." I rolled my eyes, resulting in a stab with the eyeliner.

"Ooh, sorry!" Angela cried.

"He just sits there and stares at her sometimes as well." Mike put in through a mouthful of cupcake. What was it with boys and talking with full mouths?

"They've been here for about two years, I can't believe you haven't seen them in the cafeteria." Angela said. "They're all so.. perfect looking."

"They are." Jessica agreed, then gasped. "Maybe Edward likes you!"

"No way. He's like the King of Ice." I replied.

"Besides, Bella already has a boyfriend." Mike put in. I cast him a dirty look.

"Whoa, whoa. You have a boyfriend?" Jessica squealed.

"A boyfriend?" Angela repeated. "I can totally see why. You're gorgeous." She smiled. I felt myself blush.

"He's huge, like over six feet tall." Mike said.

"Who is he?" Jessica asked.

"His name's Jacob, we've been together forever." I answered, smiling.

"Aw, she's smiling." Angela giggled.

"Of course she's smiling." Jessica said. "Is he hot, Mike?"

"How am I supposed to know?" Mike asked incredulously.

"Well, if you were gay, would you be into him?" Jessica turned to him, and Mike didn't answer for a few minutes, then sighed.

"Yeah, he totally tried to make me feel like a boy. It worked." I heard the defeat in Mike's voice at that lost pride. "He lives on the reservation."

"Oh! He's Quiluete?" Jessica laughed, then sighed happily.

"Yeah, he is quite beautiful." I agreed.

"Have you guys.. you know. Bow chicka.." Jessica asked.

"Jess..." Angela started.

"Inappropriate Jess." Mike said. "We've only just got her here. We don't want her leaving anytime soon."

"Right, sorry. We'll save that for another time. I can't believe you have a boyfriend and didn't tell me." Jessica squealed again. I laughed at her.

"Shouldn't people be arriving about now?" Angela asked, looking out Mike's window, trying to change the subject. "There's Ben! I'll get the door." She ran down the stairs.

"Angela's got a small thing for Ben." Jessica said, sitting on the other office chair.

"And she won't let him know, so they've been secretly pining for each other for like, a year." Mike said. Jessica jumped up and looked out Mike's window.

"People are getting here!" She danced out the door.

"So," Mike started, and I turned around to face him. He stopped in mid-sentence, which, of course made me blush even harder than I had before. "You look nice." He said.

"Thank you." I said, looking at his floor. "Don't you think we should go downstairs?" I got up and walked out of Mike's bedroom, and down the stairs.

"Yaay!" Jessica greeted me at the bottom of the stairs, and I felt Mike behind me. "Welcome to the part-ay!"

"Drinks all around!" Eric cried out, running out of the kitchen.

The gathering ended up being around the population of the whole school. I side-stepped around bodies and dodged people, trying to find Jessica or Angela. Music was pumping from the speakers and I was slightly dancing along with it, copying moves from other people.

"Hey Bells." Mike called, and I turned toward his voice, finding him talking to another guy, who made Mike look like a homeless dog in looks.

"This is Trent. Trent, my friend Bella" Mike introduced us. Trent reached out a hand towards mine, and I shook it. He had close cropped brown hair, blue eyes and a white, teethy smile.

"Hi." I replied, smiling at him, feeling confident. I didn't notice how watchful he appeared to be, his eyes flitting around his surroundings.

"He's a friend of mine from out of town." Mike smiled, a dimple showing in his cheek. I'd already downed a few drinks from Eric and was starting to feel really good, and a little dizzy. I didn't know what it was, but everything seemed to be brighter and everyone seemed to be having more fun.

"Neat." I replied. Noticing how Mike's face will look great once the baby fat went away. I shook myself, to try to clear my head, but it felt like fluff swishing around in my brain, which made me giggle. Suddenly, thoughts of peeing came into my mind.

"I have to pee." I told Mike. He nodded and I then went off in search of his bathroom, finding it. This wasn't a good idea, I never drank, I hadn't have alcohol in a very long time. I sat down to the longest pee I've ever had in my lifetime.

I was washing my hands when Trent came in the bathroom. He looked shocked at seeing me in here, but closed the door behind him.

"You look nice tonight, very beautiful." He said lowly

"Thank you." I replied, trying to step around him to get out of the bathroom, which seemed to be getting smaller as more seconds passed, like it was closing in on me. He stepped in my way, looking down at me in a way no one should ever have to experience. He backed me against a wall, and I was helpless in trying to get out. He shoved a knee between my legs, pinning me against the wall and starting uttering really dirty things to me, and how he was going to play it out. It took longer than it should have to register how wrong it was and then I tried squirming out, but he held me there. I realized that I was screaming over the music, but it seemed useless. No one would hear me. I was scared for my life and my virtue, and I wasn't going to admit defeat. I struggled against him, squirming and trying to get away from him. He tried to pull back my shirt and looked at me hungrily, like a wolf just before it kills it's prey.

It felt like years later that the door burst open and my savior came in the form of Mike Newton. Trent was thrown off of me and I was free. I went running out as I heard a fist connect with something hard. My fight or flight reaction kicked in and my mind knew that there was no way that I was staying here any longer. I saw the worried faces of Jessica and Angela and Ben and Eric fly past me as I ran outside and fell, gasping beside my truck. I heard Mike yelling after me, trying to catch up with me.

"Bella, Bella. I'm so sorry." Mike said, kneeling in front of me.

"Go away." I said helplessly. He wiped something wet off of my face. I hadn't even noticed I'd been crying. It all seemed so unreal.

"It's alright Bella. It's okay. I'm so sorry I let that happen." Mike said softly. His hands were brushing my face and I knew that he was trying to console me, but I didn't want to be touched anymore.

"I'm going home." I said, standing up.

"Bella, I can't let you drive home like this." Mike said, trying to pull me away. I pushed him and climbed into my truck.

"I'm sober and I'm going home." I said more firmly, starting up my truck. He relented and I pulled out of his driveway, amazingly. I couldn't see through the rain and I couldn't find the wipers. I decided to skip home, I was going to go to the reservation, because I was feeling the need, a compulsion to find him, I was going to find Jake, and be near him. I just kept driving, pushing the truck to go faster, delighted when I knew I was in the reservation. I started to imagine surprising him, curling up in his bed and crying on his shoulder. He would reassure me. He would make everything safe.

All of a sudden, a car appeared out of nowhere and it startled me. I swerved to avoid the bright headlights and all of a sudden, I felt a short falling sensation, and then I was thrown into the steering wheel. I'd forgotten to put my seatbelt on and hit my head off of the windshield. The truck came to an abrupt stop and I was thrown back into the seat, and then back towards the steering wheel. I put my hands out to stop myself.


	9. Aphonic

_Jacob, Quil, Embry, Bina and I used to play practical jokes on Seth when he was in primary and we were in grade two. Nothing at school to embarass him, but at his house we couldn't get enough of the elementary school jokes. We'd wait for him to fall asleep, put shaving cream in his hand and tickle his nose, we'd draw on his face with permanant marker, tie him/duct tape him to trees, pants him constantly or take all of his clothes so that he'd had to run around in his underwear. We were ruthless, and Seth hated us at that stage in his life. Leah wanted us to stop as well; she was really protective of him, and that's probably the reason she is still today._

I staggered out of the truck, walking down the road, yelling Jake's name. I was scared, and I couldn't think straight and the cold rain was pouring down, soaking me. I walked for a century before I came upon the little red house, the bleak yard light illuminating it. I was still screaming Jake's name, my throat hoarse from all the yelling. Answering my calls, the beautiful figure of Jacob suddenly appeared, bursting out the door and jogging over to me.

"Bella?" Jake asked. He sounded scared, terrified even, as he broke into a sprint across the yard to where I was on my knees on the middle of the road. "What the hell?" His warm arms surrounded me like a good feeling, as he hoisted me onto his lap. I sank into his warm, muscled chest and tried to slow my crying and stop my hiccoughing.

"Bella, what happened to you?" Jake asked soothingly, keeping me in a tight embrace and smoothing my hair back. I could smell the rust and salt that I associated with blood as he wiped something off of my forehead. "What did you do? What happened? Are you drunk?" His voice stayed soothing the whole time, a low rumble, as he looked me over for anything else. "We have to get you to a hospital, you're probably going to need stitches."

I couldn't answer him, I couldn't bring myself to actually speak. I just kept crying into his chest, trying to get as close as possible to him. He kept both arms firmly wrapped around me, all the while trying to figure out what happened. Finally, he just stood up and carried me out down the road. A couple minutes later, he stopped.

"Holy- Oh shit." He said, then set me down again, trying to see my face "Bells, baby. You have to tell me what happened." I looked over to where he was had looked and saw my truck in a ditch, rear end up and front end against a tree.

"Jacob, what's going on." Came a calm voice out of the dark, not a question, but an authoritative statement compelling Jacob to talk. Sam came into view, his eyes watchful and careful, Jared not two seconds after.

"I dont know." Jake answered, hugging me tighter into him. stroking my head. "I just heard her screaming in front of my house and found her pretty much like this.

"Alright, well you need to call her father and tell him where she is. Then you need to take her to the hospital, she may have internal injuries." Sam said with authority. I felt Jake nod, but I caught myself glaring at Sam, thinking about how he'd hurt Leah. I didn't want to listen to him at all, but my mouth wouldn't open and form any words. "Jared and I will take care of this." Same turned to the truck.

"Alright." Jake answered, then lifted me up again. The rhythm of his breathing didn't change as he walked home and brought me inside, sitting down at the chair. I clutched him as if my life depended on it, for some reason needing to be near Jake. I heard him on the phone, explaining to Charlie the situation.

"What's going on Bella?" Billy asked, wheeling out to where we were, his black eyes staring straight into mine. I could only look back at him

"It's okay, Dad." Jake broke in his explaining to Charlie, then started up again. Billy looked at me pitifully, and I probably was a horrible sight at the moment, hanging off of Jake, a deathgrip around his middle.

Jake hung up the phone and kissed the top of my head. He wrapped both arms tight around me and rubbed my back consolingly.

"Bella, it's going to be fine. You'll be okay," He suddenly looked up and I heard the engine of the truck pulling into the driveway.

"Jake, get her to the hospital." Billy said firmly. Jake stood up, and grabbed my hand. He led me out the door and over to where Sam and Jared were standing, patiently waiting next to the truck.

"How'd you get it out of there?" Jake asked, walking around to the front of the truck. I noticed that it only had a small bump from its dive into the ditch

"Hospital." Sam said, and Jake put me into the truck first, through the driver's side door, then slid in himself, thanking Sam and waving goodbye. He pulled out of the driveway and headed to the hospital in Forks.

When we got there, Charlie was waiting, pacing outside the hospital doors. Jake and I stepped out of the truck and he rushed over to us, his eyes frantic and his hair wild from, it looked, running his hands through it. His shirt was wrinkled and his jeans looked like he'd pulled them off the floor, which he probably did. He looked worriedly at me, and I felt bad, but I couldn't tell him I was fine. I looked away

"I had to call Dr. Cullen and ask him to come in specially, because the hospital is closed at nighttime for now because of the doctor shortage, even the ER." He said brusquely. I could feel his eyes on me, but didn't look up to meet them.

"Hello, how is our patient?" A man walked up to the doors and unlocked them, turning on lights, making a path to one of the rooms. We followed him in as he rushed around, setting his medical bag down and readying things.

"Put her on the table please." He said pleasantly.

"Hi Bella, I'm Dr. Cullen." He said to me. Only a squeak escaped my lips in response. He had light blonde hair, and golden eyes- curiously like Edward- and he was pale with dark circles around his eyes, like he'd not slept in a long time. He also had a very calm demeanour, which made me feel more at ease.

"Well, that's more than I've got her to say so far." Jake said. I kept my hand woven through his and I could feel the temperature difference between his warm hand and my ice cold one, as he sat close, rubbing my back.

"She's going to need four or five stitches in her forehead." Dr. Cullen said.

"Sam said she might have internal injuries as well." Jake said worriedly.

After about fifteen minutes of checking my vitals and checking me over, he set down his stethoscope and leaned back in his chair.

"She has no internal injuries, but now I'm going to sew you up." He smiled grimly at me.

"Thank you so much for coming in, doctor." Charlie said gratefully. "We probably woke you up."

"It was no problem." Dr. Cullen waved it off as he prepared the suture needle. This wasn't anything new to me, I was clumsy and had acquired about eighty-seven stitches in my short life. He put in the four stitches in clean, swift motions after freezing the cut and cleaning it out, then covered it with a bandage. My mind was pretty clear by this time and I had calmed down enough that tears had stopped spilling out of my eyes, but what I really wanted was to be alone with Jake. Charlie thanked the doctor one last time, and we left Carlisle in the hospital, to shut it down again and we found ourselves in the parking lot.

"If you don't mind, Charlie, I'd really like to be with Bella right now." Jake said, something pleading in his voice, almost like he sensed my need for him right now.

"No, Jake. I think you should go home and get some sleep." Charlie protested, but it wasn't very convincing, and when Jake asked one more time, Charlie gave in, stating that we had to come to his house, and for Jake to call Billy and let him know.

Jake drove the truck, and Charlie his cruiser. I went with Jake, still keeping an iron grip on his hand. He helped me out of the truck and led me up to my room, after assuring Charlie that I was okay and that Billy already knew. He sat me down on the floor in the far corner of my room, on a pile of blankets, and pulled me into him again.

"Bells, I'm here, and I know you don't want to talk right now, but you have to tell me." Jake's voice was husky and compelling as he put his hands on either side of my face. "Please tell me." His dark eyes, illuminated by the moonlight, were pleading and worried, begging me to tell him. I felt the tears starting to spill over in my eyes, and all of a sudden my brain thought that this was a good time to allow my mouth to move again.

"Today, Jess invited me to a thing a M-Mike's." I whispered, my voice hoarse from the screaming. My mind felt completely clear now, and I felt awful, thinking over what happened tonight.

"Did something happen?" Jake's eyes flickered with anger.

"Trent. Trent, he just, he.. me on the wall, dirty words." I had lowered my eyes and couldn't bring myself to look at him.

"Fuck." Jake whispered, his voice breaking. I saw his Adam's apple bob up and down violently and it was a few minutes before he did anything else. His hand was shaking as he gently lifted my chin. His eyes were dark with badly concealed anger. "Did he do anything to you? Did he hurt you in _any_ way?"

"He didn't, didn't rape me. He didn't get that far. Mike pulled him off and punched him. Then I ran and wanted to go to your house." I murmured. His whole body was shaking beside me, as I felt the rage coursing through him.

"Let me get this straight. Jessica invited you to Mike's house for a gathering, which turned into a party." He stopped and took a deep breath. "A guy took you into the bathroom, after you drank too much, and tried to rape you. Mike pulled him off and you ran into your truck and tried to drive to my house, but crashed and wandered over yelling my name?" Jake's voice was shaking as well, and his breath was loud through his nose.

"I was using the bathroom. He came in and closed the door." I dropped my head to his shoulder. "Mike tried to stop me from driving."

Jake was silent for a long time, and I could hear his heart pounding in his chest as he tried to take even, though shaky breaths to calm himself down. I stroked the side of his face with my thumb, placing kisses on his collarbone every so often. I probably shouldn't have even told him, if I'd known that it would have these results. His body tensed and relaxed, almost like he wanted to get up and run.

"Bella, I need you to understand that I'm not mad at you." Jake said firmly.

"I know, Jake." I replied. "It's okay though, nothing happened. Nothing that hurts me a lot. I was just scared, and confused."

"It obviously happened enough that what happened to you tonight made you do what you did." Jake whispered, almost not making any sense.

"Thanks." I said to Jake, leaning up and pressing my lips against his.

"I wish that I was there, or that I wasn't out with Quil and Embry." Jake lowered his head.

"It will be fine." I tried to make him feel better about it. "There's no way that you could have anticipated that."

"I'm still worried about your injuries." Jake said. "What if something happens during the night?"

"I feel great, Dr. Cullen checked me over and said I was fine. He's the best doctor out here." I said, now reassuring him.

"I know..." He said, unconvincingly. "Bella, you were drinking and driving. You're lucky that you didn't hurt anyone."

"I know, I'm lucky Dr. Cullen didn't mention it to Charlie." I looked away from Jake's face.

"I'm just glad you're alright." His voice was suddenly soft, his hand cupped my face and I leaned into it, realizing how exhausted I was.

"Okay, you have to promise not to move." I said, scooting away from him. His body was giving off a lot of heat as well. I was cold the moment our bodies weren't touching anymore.

"I promise." Jake replied. "Not an inch." I ran to the bathroom and threw on some pajama shorts and an old shirt. I gathered my hair into a ponytail, and ran back to Jake, not even checking my reflection in the mirror. Jake was as still as a statue.

"You didn't move." I said, grateful.

"I promised." Jake tucked a loose strand of hair behind my ear.

"You're so great to me." I said, hugging him, wrapping my arms around his broad back.

"I think you're much greater." Jake murmured.

"You sound tired." I said, slipping my hands under his shirt. He raised his arms as I pulled it over his head.

"I'm not that tired." He argued, trying to hide a yawn.

I stood up, grabbing both of his hands and pulling him over to my bed. I tossed back the covers and let him crawl into the bed before laying down and curling up in his arms. His breathing became regular within the minute and listening to it helped me fall asleep.

I heard Charlie come into the room and draw the blinds.

"Wake up children." He said, and I opened my eyes. He was looking at me worriedly.

"Morning Dad." I said, and relief flooded his face.

"I'm still almost opposed to you and Jake sleeping in the same bed together." He smiled. Jake rolled over and rubbed his eyes.

"Morning Chief." He said sleepily.

"Are you heading to school today? You don't have to, but I've been bombarded with calls since five." He sat down on the edge of the bed.

"I've got a test today." Jake said, sitting up. "If you want to go to school, I'll drive you there and take the truck."

"Alright.' I agreed, then sat up, and fell back down. "Whoa."

"What is it?" Jake asked, immediately worried.

"My head." I groaned. Charlie was running down the stairs and back with a glass of water and some pills in a few minutes. I took them gratefully and waited for it to kick in before getting up. Jake took a quick shower and threw on some clothes. I just changed, and washed off the caked-on ruined makeup and I was ready. I didn't feel like showering or eating breakfast, I felt too sick to eat.

"Are you ready?" Jake asked me as I stood in the foyer. His forehead was wrinkled. "Maybe I should stay with you..."

"I don't want you to worry about me." I said, cutting him off.

"It's not nothing." He protested.

"Jacob, thank you for taking care of me last night. I love you so much." His eyes softened, and I pressed my lips against his, and was about to deepen the kiss, when I heard Charlie clear his throat.

"Sorry Dad," I said, looking at the floor, embarassed.

"Come on, let's get you to school." Jake said, leading me out the door.

"See you later Dad!" I called out at the same time Jake did.

Jake went over to the passenger side door, opening it and holding it open, smiling.

"Jake, can't I drive?" I said, stopping at the front of the truck.

"Who would I be to let you drive when you just had a trauma?" Jake stuck out his lower lip at me, looking pathetic. I sighed and hopped into the passenger seat. He jumped in the driver's seat, and started it up. He reached over and squeezed my knee before backing out of the driveway, letting his hand glide across my lap and entwine with my hand.


	10. Marred

Jessica, Mike, Angela, Eric and Ben ran over to us as the truck rumbled into a parking space and we got out. They stopped dead when Jake came up behind me, putting his arm around my waist.

"Bella!" Jessica cried, the first to react to Jake's presence, by hugging me and then stepping back, gaping.

"Guys, this is Jake." I said, gesturing over to him. I felt proud as Angela's and Jessica's jaws dropped a little when they looked up at him, and took his appearance in appreciatively.

"Hey." Jake said politely, giving a small smile, easily about five inches taller than even lanky Eric. I felt his arm curl protectively around me. It appeared what happened last night was obviously still bothering him, and it felt like he was trying to show ownership. His eyes cautiously raked each of their faces, his own expression almost daring them to mess with him.

"Jessica, Angela, Eric, Ben and Mike." I said, pointing in correspondance. He nodded at each of them, tensing then releasing when I got to Mike.

He then turned to me, his eyes tired and still worried. I thought I saw protectiveness in there too "I have to go, but I'll be back to pick you up after school." He said, lowering his voice. I closed my eyes and smiled as he placed a soft, chaste kiss on my cheek, at the same time I felt his ring finger wrap around mine and squeeze.

"Okay, see you later." I said, giving him a quick hug. I saw him give Mike a quick pat on the back and a small 'thank you' before he got into the truck. He started it back up, and honked on his way out of the parking lot. Everyone's eyes followed him out.

"Oh my god." Angela and Jessica said at the same time.

"You were not lying Mike. He is gorgeous." Jessica seemed awed by him, but quickly snapped out of it as she led me to the surprisingly dry picnic table, sitting me down at it. They all grouped around me, gathering close.

"Look, Bella. I'm sorry about what I let happen last night. I really am." Mike started, but I held up a hand.

"No, I'm over it. Nothing inappropriate happened, I'm not all that traumatized from it." I reassured him, then put a hand on his. "Thanks for rescuing me though. I'm... grateful that you were there or it could have gone farther."

To be completely honest, after what I went through last night, I wasn't still too worried about it. I understood that it could have gone a lot further if Mike hadn't have knocked him off, and that's what helped me to get myself over it that quickly. I couldn't really remember the details, but I knew that I didn't want them to worry about me over it. Talking about it with Jake had made me feel better, and it was the feeling after I got out of my truck, and not being able to immediately find Jake and being scared, alone and confused that my mind chose to rest upon. I subconciously touched the bandage on my forhead

"Oh, Bells. Mike filled us in." Angela said, looking worried.

"I'm great. I talked about it, then slept and I'm fine." I said, smiling.

"We should have stayed with you." Jessica sounded guilty.

"I bet parties on the reservation aren't like that." Ben chuckled apprehensively.

"We don't usually need alcohol." I laughed, thinking of Bina, my almost alcohol-dependent friend.

"What happened to your forehead?" Jessica asked bluntly. Her hand reached out towards it subconciously.

"I, um... crashed my truck." I said, my face flushing.

"Oh my god! And you got stitches!" Angela covered her mouth with her hand. I saw Mike look guiltily away.

"Just four." I replied, shrugging

"There wasn't even a dent on that truck. Damn." Ben said admiringly.

"We should get to first class though." Eric checked his watch and looked around at us. Everyone gave me a hug before they left to their respective classes.

"I heard about what happened last night, it's horrible that there are people like that out there." The soft, persuading voice that I had come to know as Edward's said, suddenly beside me.

"I don't need to hear anything else about it." I said, before he elaborated on anything.

"I was merely expressing my condolences." He mused. What was he talking about? No one had died.

"Has the whole school heard about it?" I sighed, trying to go into the building.

"Most of them." There was an almost arrogant grin on his face.

"I have to get to class." I said before I got angry with him. He seemed to be amused by my situation. I left him outside, as I went into English class.

I wasn't alone even one moment for the rest of the day. Someone sat with me and talked to me. I talked back, but was lucky that I only had to encourage Jessica with a few nods and 'really?'s. I kind of got the feeling that they felt bad about last night, but they never let on, and it made me feel less lonely, and more like I had friends here. Lunch blasted by, sitting at the small table, squished into a group and then enduring Biology with a curious Edward. I dodged his questions, reciprocating with other questions about himself, which he didn't seem quite so keen on sharing. Mike kept me company in Gym, giving the teacher smiles when she gave us dirty looks. She ignored us, and we got away with not doing anything. The end of the day came with a sigh of relief, and I felt good that I already had such great friends. They all said goodbye to me, and I returned it, promising a get together sometime this weekend.

Jake loped towards me across the ground, his long legs carrying him to me within seconds. I jumped into his arms as he came within touching distance, and he greeted me just as enthusiastically.

"You look like you had a great day." Jake said cheerfully.

"I did." I said truthfully.

"It's great that you're making good friends here." Jake said.

"How was your day?" I asked as he set me back down onto the groud.

"Never mind that. I brought you a surprise." Jake turned me around and I saw Bina hurtling towards me, a determined look on her face and her long hair flowing behind her.

"Bina!" I grinned, jumping up.

"Bella. I miss you!" Bina and I met in a giant bear hug. "Jake told me what happened to you last night, and I'm here." She said. I then realized what great friends I had.

"Thanks Bine." I grinned.

"Well, well. Who is this?" Eric came into my sight. "A friend of yours Bella?"

"Unavailable." Bina smiled devilishly at him. He winked and walked off to his car. She drug me over to the truck, Jake sauntering along behind us.

"Oh my goodness. I can't believe that could happen to you." Bina said as soon as we were in the truck. Jake was driving, and I threw an arm across his lap as I talked to Bella.

"I know. But I was lucky." I replied, waving it off.

"You'll be glad to be away from all of that. La Push is full of drama lately. There's talk of having a council meeting." Bina said in an ominous voice.

"Bina..." Jake tried to shush her.

"No, I want to tell her first Jacob." Bina cut him off, and leaned around me and punched his shoulder.

"What's going on?" I asked, looking between the two.

"What's going on is that our best friend is crushed." Bina said, disgusted.

"Which one?" I was getting confused.

"Leah, of course. Her second cousin Emily, you remember her from when we were like, six. She came over last night while Sam was at Leah's. Something mysterious happened and now he's gone and broke up with Leah for Emily. Just like that." Bina snapped her fingers.

"Whoa. Didn't she tell us he promised that he wouldn't hurt her slash he would never leave her?" My mouth flew open at the news. My brain wouldn't process it.

"A guy named Paul has joined Sam's 'cult'." Jake put in, making quotations with his hands. He sneered at the fact.

"And the thing is, they're not even like, a gang. They're more like the peacekeepers of La Push. They've also been cliffdiving from the highest cliff, like they're so cool." Bina seemed excited at all the goings-on, and the available gossip.

"We're meeting Quil, Embry and Seth down at the beach. Right now, they're trying to drag Leah out of her bed. She's pretty depressed." Jake said.

"Stop the truck in this parking lot!" Bina yelled suddenly, We were just inside the reservation now, and she pointed wildly at an almost hidden lot. "We can walk to the beach!"

Jake silently pulled the truck into the lot and shut it off. He slipped the keys into his pants pocket as we all got out of the truck. He was quiet and thoughtful today, and he kept placing his hand on my shoulder, or the small of my back or my arm, almost reassuring me that he was there.

"I'm going to Leah's house." Bina had her phone open in her hand and was scrolling through a message. She looked up at us "I'll meet you guys down at the beach. She doesn't want your lovey-doveyness in her sight at the moment. You're going to have to tone it down." With that she turned and skipped away, out of the covered lot and I lost sight of her.

"Shall we go down to the beach?" I asked. Jake nodded and I turned to go, but suddenly I felt Jake grab my hand and he swung me back, quickly bringing my lips to his. I repsonded instantly, melting into his body. He broke away, his broad lips breaking into a smile like it was our little secret. He grabbed my hand as we walked out of the lot.

We arrived at the beach some time later to Quil, Embry and Seth sitting in a sand patch, looking sullen. They looked up at us as we came within talking distance, looking surprised at our arrival.

"Hey guys." I said, taking a seat next to Embry. He ducked his head shyly, not being the most outgoing of people. His hair hid his face.

"Hey Bella." Seth said, always content.

"So we heard what happened." Quil said, sliding closer to me. "And if it were up to me, I'd pound the shit out of the guy."

"Why thank you." I grinned. Quil had always had my back as a friend. "How are you today Embry?"

"I'm great." He replied shortly, holding eye contact with me for less than a second. I gave him a friendly elbow, passing off how hot his skin felt. Jake sighed.

"Embry is pretty mad about what happened as well, which is why he's acting so shyly." Jake punched Embry's leg.

"Can you believe that Paul is in on Sam's thing too?" Quil asked. "It's ridiculous."

"Everything is ridiculous lately. Too much drama has been going on." Jake replied.

"Guys!" Came Bina's voice from the path down to the beach. She came into view, skipping still, dragging Leah behind her. Leah looked awful. She hadn't brushed her hair in a while, her eyes were red-rimmed and she just looked wasted, sunken into herself. Like somebody had pulled a carpet from under her. I stood up when they reached us and pulled Leah to me, hugging her hard, because she really looked like she needed one. She hugged me back, weakly. The truth about it was, it freaked me out. Leah was the strong one, she was always level-headed and outspoken. I was scared for her.

Bina sat down next to Leah across the circle from me. I watched Leah, and she seemed to withdraw and sink into herself as everyone turned to look at her. Seth looked pained as he saw Leah's condition. She tried to hold her head up, to pretend that it wasn't bothering her, but you could tell she was ready to break down and hurl herself off a cliff. Her and Sam had been the golden couple, the cutest couple in the school, voted to last forever.

"So, did he give you a reason?" Quil was always the one to open his mouth first. I saw dirty looks all around as Leah's eyes widened.

"He said that he couldn't explain it to me, but it had to happen. I don't even understand what happened there." Leah said bitterly, her face contorting with pain and anger. "You should have felt it when he saw her. Just completely ignored me and drooled over her like a dog. What the hell?"

"Wow, right in front of you too." Jake showed his displeasure at what was happening.

"I blame this on Sam." Quil patted Leah's knee reassuringly. She jerked away.

"Don't touch me." She snarled. She sounded so fierce that Quil dropped his hand immediately, and the rest of us just stared at her.

"So, everything is pretty outrageous right now." Bina said, trying to break the awkwardness.

"Is he with her-with her now?" Seth asked meekly.

"What do you think?" Leah spat, and then sat back sulkily. We all made eye contact, quietly asking each other what was going on. "You don't know how hard it is." She said quietly, and she was right. None of us had ever had to go through what she just did.

"Well, we're here. You know that." Bina said, taking her hand. Leah only nodded, tears escaping her eyes. She quickly wiped them away.

"I'm not feeling too good today guys, I think I've got a fever. I'm going home." Embry said, standing up.

"Bye." Seth, Jake, Bina and I said together at the same time Quil said "Later bud." Leah only sniffed.

"See you later." He waved and left, walking down the beach.

"Embry was a little quiet today." Seth said, looking worried.

"You worry too much, Seth." I said, grinning at him. I reached over and messed up his dark hair. "It will make you old fast."

"Well, look at Leah." Seth said, jerking his thumb towards her. "Growing up with her is bound to do it." He grinned at Leah to show he was joking. She managed a small smile in return for her little brother.

"You guys are great to me, but I think that I'm just going to go home too." Leah said, standing up.

"Alright, bye." Quil said.

"See you later." Bina looked up at her.

"I hope you're okay." I said, trying to be reassuring.

"See ya." Jake and Seth threw in as she turned around the way she came. Once she was gone, Quil turned back around.

"What do you think made Sam go to Emily?" He whispered. "I mean, he and Leah were pretty intimate."

"There was soemthing supernatural about it when he saw Emily." Seth said, then added sadly "I'm worried about her."

"We all are, bud." Bina threw in, pulling herself towards Seth. Her and her silly little thing for Seth. I gave her a look, and she mouthed 'what' at me.

"Not the time." I whispered.

"Emily is pretty." Quil said. "I saw her earlier." He smiled over at Jake, who just rolled his eyes. He subtly wrapped his hand around my kneecap, giving it a small squeeze. He gave me a small smile, flicking a piece of hair out of his eyes.

"Why would she do that to Leah though? They're blood. And that runs deep." Bina said, and she sounded unnerved about the whole situation.

"You don't understand it." A deep voice came from behind us. I turned around and Jared was standing there, an angry looking Paul behind him, who looked like he was almost vibrating. Like Sam and Jared, Paul had grown about a foot, developed very large muscles and shaved his hair off. They were both wearing only cutoff shorts, leaving their well-muscled chests and feet bare. Jared looked at Jake with a kind of sad apprehensiveness.

"What don't we understand exactly?" Bina threw in, always the loudmouth of the group.

"It's not a good idea to be hanging around her anymore right now." Jared said, looking into the sky, completely ignoring Bina's question. We all looked up to where he was looking, but when I glanced back, they were walking away. But before we even got the chance to question it, a downpour started, dropping big fat drops of rain on our heads. We shrieked and all began running for cover.

"Bina's basement!" I heard Quil yell. Bina's house was the closest to where we were, and was a popular hang-out place after school. The rain didn't look like it was going to let up either, and I was already soaked to the skin.


	11. Fervour

_Bina and I were twelve when we first got into her Dad's beer. He had already had a few that night and we decided that he wouldn't mind if we stole a couple from him. We snuck into the liquor cabinet and ran downstairs, collapsing together on the couch and giggled as we popped off the tops. Bina counted to three and we took a big gulp at the same time. It was so bitter, my eyes watered as I fought the urge to spit it out and forced it down my throat._

_"Wow," Bina cried, her eyes lighting up. "This tastes..."_

_"Weird." I replied, but Bina took a few more gulps, finishing it off. I drank the rest of mine as well, not wanting to look like a loser in front of her when she always seemed so knowing. I remember a lot of giggling that night, but her Dad didn't find out about any of his alcohol missing until we were fourteen, then he reprimanded us, told my Dad and we both got grounded for a couple weeks. It didn't stop Bina at all, but I hardly touched it._

With the tension in the past few weeks and everything that was going on here. From me moving to a new school, to this mysterious group of Sam's that kept expanding, Jake and I had been pretty distracted. A lot of the time before this, there was mostly sexual tension that we had to deal with, but it had settled down for the moment, or we didn't notice it as much right now, and we were like an old couple. Essentially we were, I don't even remember the transiton from friends to dating. I was feeling kind of down about the whole situation when Jake pulled into my driveway Sunday morning, looking happy on the outside, but the moment that I opened the door and our eyes met, I knew that something was troubling him, as was the problem lately.

"Hey you." I smiled at him, giving him a quick hug.

"Hey." He came in the door and followed me into the kitchen, where I grabbed two bowls and the box of Fruit Loops from the cupboard and two spoons from the drawer. I set them in front of him, grabbing the milk from the fridge.

"So what's up?" I asked, sitting down at the chair next to him. I interrupted him as he opened his mouth to say something. "And I don't want to hear 'nothing'. I want to know what's really up."

"Well, it seems that Sam's recruited another one." Jake spat, he set his elbow on the table and leaned into it.

"Another one?" I asked, trying to prompt him into telling me who. He would, because Jake has never kept anything from me.

"Yeah." He seemed really down today, and he ate quietly for a few minutes.

"Who was it?" I said, tentatively. His eyes flickered up to mine for a second.

"Embry." My jaw dropped and I swore my heart stopped for a moment. Embry? Shy, sweet Embry?

"B-b-b.." I stuttered, not making any sense.

"Yeah, I know." Jake said bitterly.

"No." I managed. How could he take Embry? He's been with us since we were little, best friends. "He's sick."

"It doesn't look like it anymore" Jake let out a great sigh, like the world was pushing down on him.

"So," I started meekly. "Has he changed as well?"

"He's changed everything about himself, and it was just this morning that I saw him with Sam, Jared and Paul. He wouldn't even talk to me." Jake's usual happy mood was missing, and it was almost like missing an arm. I felt so bad for him. "Just gave me a sad look, couldn't even look at me through his hair like he normally would, because it's gone!"

"Oh my-"

"Yeah. There's something different about him too, there's something about all of them that I just can't figure out. It's like they're all the same, and different. Sam keeps giving me these looks..." Jake started in on a quiet rant that filled up about twenty minutes. I listened closely, as he was clearly hurt from the snub from Embry today. I really did listen too, because I genuinely cared about his well-being, and my friends. I felt really responsible a lot of the time when they got hurt, and this was just the same. By the sounds of it, Sam had talked Embry into joining his stupid group. Anger flared up inside me at the thought of it. Embry was _our_ friend.

"This is stupid." I seethed after he was done.

"I know." His worn eyes met mine as he said it and for a small fraction of time, I could feel his pain and fatigue. It hit me like a shockwave, and I realized how stressed Jake has been forever, but has never let anyone see it. He usually didn't let it bother him throughout the day, but everything lately had been taking it's toll on him and it was coming out. My hand reached out towards his face of it's own accord and I brushed it over Jake's soft cheek. He nuzzled into it, closing his eyes and letting a small smile slip.

"Jake..." I started, not completely sure where I was going with it. He opened his eyes and looked at me. It had always amazed me how expressive his eyes were; how much he could say with just one look. He took both of my hands in his.

"Bella." He smiled. "I know how hard things have been for us lately and I know how it feels like things between us have settled down, and you're worrying about it."  
I raised my eyebrows in surprise. I kept forgetting how perceptive he was as well. He reached out and smoothed out the wrinkles in my forehead. He gracefully brought his chair over so that it was right in front of mine. His hands slipped up around my head, one tangling through my hair and one on the side of my neck. His eyes burned into mine, now smoldering as he leaned in and brushed his lips, softly, just barely against mine as his thumb traced my jaw. My heart flip-flopped at the touch and the butterflies in my stomach shot all the way around my body, causing a tingling sensation all throughout. The hand left my neck, raising goosebumps and looped around my waist, pulling me onto his lap with ease so that I was now straddling him.

"I don't want you to worry about it." Jake said, his voice low, and slightly shaky. I didn't give him the chance to talk any further, pressing my lips to his and then deepening the kiss. It was glorious, and I hadn't realized how much I missed the small moments like these, his soft lips yielding to mine, bodies pressed together, fitting to each other like it was meant to be.

Jake broke off the kiss, as my hands were up his shirt, nails running down his back. His hands were grazing my pantline as if they couldn't decide whether or not to go further and his breathing was laboured as he looked at me, his eyes black with lust, and it was silent for a few minutes as we looked at each other. I worked on slowing my heart down and breathing normal again. His hand softly picked mine up and he kissed my fingertips tenderly.

"I know that we won't settle down." I said quietly. "Like you mean."

"It has been hard though, and there's been a lot going on." He replied. "I wish that everything wasn't screwed up so that we wouldn't have to slow down."

"Why don't we just not?" I whispered, rolling my hips. His hands quickly caught them and stopped it. I was being irrational, and I knew exactly why, but my hormones were getting the better of me. Jake smiled and brushed a piece of hair behind my ear

"Because you only get one chance, and ours is going to be perfect." His voice was soothing, persuasive, gentle. The look on his face was pure adoration. My heart jumped into my throat, and I wanted him that much more.

"If only everything wasn't so stupid right now." I slid off his lap and back into my chair. Jake smirked.

"Stupid? Everything is stupid right now?" He teased.

"Shut up. You know what I mean." I punched his knee lightly.

"You just have way too many hormones too deal with, you animal." He said jokingly, tweaking my nose.

"Ha. _My_ hormones are the ones that are taking over." I replied sarcastically.

"How could I not?" Jake pretended to look astonished, holding a hand over his heart. "Look at you." His lean body came towards me and he placed a soft kiss under my jawline. I inhaled quickly as goosebumps raised all over my body.

"Look at me." I grumbled as he leaned back. "Look at you."

"What about me?" He tilted his head to the side, regarding me curiously. I looked up at him, his flawless russet skin, his dark shiny hair, his beautiful brown eyes framed by long lashes, his broad lips and constant smile.

"You're like..." I started, but paused, trying to think of the word. "You're gorgeous."

He laughed out loud, throwing his head back.

"Clearly you're delusional." He said, twirling his finger towards his head, the universal 'crazy' sign.

"I'm delusional?" I asked, astonished. "I'd say you're the insane one."

"Don't say that." He said softly, his smile mischeivious. "Or something might happen..."

He suddenly leaped out of his chair, swinging me up with him and ran around the small kitchen with me tucked into his arms. He jumped on the chairs and ran into the living room. He threw me onto the couch and jumped on top of me, knawing on my neck playfully. I was laughing so hard I couldn't breathe.

"No, you're definitely the crazy one." He said, leaning back on his heels, still pinning me down. I stared up at him, catching my breath as he retied his hair at the nape of his neck. "Bellsie, Bellsie." He then twirled a piece of my hair around his finger.

"Yes?" I peered up at him, and he smiled brilliantly down at me. "You know, Jake. I was-"

"No." He said, putting a finger to my lips. I ceased talking immediately. "I know what you were going to bring up, and today is about us, you're supposed to forget about everything, and everyone else."

"Okay." I complied, staring up at him.

"It's why I made my little speech earlier. Because, well... I want you. I'm tired of everything else making that hard to go through." He swallowed hard, looking over across the living room, then looked back at me, smoothing my eyebrow out, then tracing my lips. "I'm-"

He was cut off by the front door opening and Charlie calling out his greeting. Jake swore under his breath and had me up sitting beside him just as Charlie came into the room.

"Afternoon Chief." Jake said pleasantly, with an undercurrent of annoyance. Charlie obviously didn't catch it.

"Hey Dad." I said, smiling, but I couldn't take my eyes off Jake. He was about to say something uncomfortable for him, he was about to admit something, and Charlie cut him off.

"Hey Bells, Jake. Jake, it's funny, I brought Billy over to watch the game." Charlie looked cheerful today as he sat down in the chair. Billy wheeled in after him.

"A game?" Jake asked, "There aren't any games on right now, are there?"

"Sure there is son." Billy's coal black eyes flicked over to us. "Hello Bella." He gave me a small smile.

"Hey Billy." I replied. I waited for them to start a conversation amongst themselves before pulled closer to Jake.

"What were you going to tell me?" I whispered lowly, making sure our fathers wouldn't hear.

"It was nothing" He whispered back "I was just going to tease you about your seriousness." He squeezed my hand as if to reassure me. I took that explanation, but something bugged me about it, like I couldn't touch on what he was really trying to say.

We spent a while watching the game with Billy and Charlie, a way to spend time with them, and then took off for a walk around Forks, to the small playground, where we played on the equipment. We walked home as the sun was setting under the horizon and stopped when we reached the front doorstep. Jake looped his long arms around me into a hug. My feet left the ground as he squeezed me, and I tried to squeeze back just as hard.

"Oh Bella." He murmured into my hair. "I adore you."


	12. Fond

_When I stayed over at Jake's house when I was a lot younger, he would set up a cot on the other side of his bedroom for me. It was comfortable and I had nothing against it, but it seemed that every single morning, without any knowledge of mine, or Jake's, I would wake up in his bed, our arms wrapped around each other in a deathgrip. It seemed that my subconcious mind had wanted the closeness and warmth, even if I didn't know it. Boys still had cooties at this time, so I'd quietly disentangle myself and walk back over and curl up under the cold sheets of the cot so that Charlie or Billy wouldn't find out._

School had been a drag all week, At this point, all I looked forward to was going straight to the reservation after school and spending most of my afternoons in Jake's warm embrace, hanging out with Quil, Bina, Seth and a catatonic Leah. Embry hadn't so much as looked at us for most of the week, and everyone was in a sullen mood because of it. No one would admit it, because it would be admitting defeat, but we all felt conquered at the loss of him. Leah spent most of our time together slouched down in her chair, staring off into space and her arms around her like she was trying, unsuccessfully to hold herself together. This was uncomfortable with us as well, and Quil was pale and looked sick as he glanced around at us like one of us was going to be the next one that he'd lose. The happenings this week were all anyone could talk about, and it was all we could talk about now as we were walking aimlessly around the town.

"Like, it's stupid. That gang bugged Embry even worse than they bugged me, and now he's gone and he's one of them." Jake said, agitated, his eyes fevered. His hand unintentionally squeezed mine as he talked.

"That's nothing." Leah said suddenly, breaking out of her daze. She didn't meet anyone's eyes as she spoke, but kept them at a spot in the distance. "Emily got attacked by a bear on Tuesday. She's only recovering from it now. One whole side of her face is messed up." Everyone looked over at Leah, surprised. Bina swore loudly.

"How did you know that? I haven't heard it anywhere." Seth asked, but Leah had shut herself down again.

"I heard Billy and Charlie talking about a bear attack, but I didn't pay much attention to it." I piped up. Bina raised her eyebrows at me.

"Who doesn't pay attention to a bear attack story?" Bina asked, narrowing her eyes.

"I don't?" I replied, smiling up at Jake. He returned the smile. It had just happened that at that moment, I was pressed against the fridge, Jake's warm body covering mine. I had only vaguely heard it over the rushing in my ears. Bina retched obviously at our moment.

"Damn." Quil said. "I bet Sam feels real bad about that."

"Probably." Jake replied. "But it's not like he could have fought the bear off."

"Yeah, has he been looking at you funny lately?" Quil asked, cocking his head at Jake.

"Staring at me. It's like I'm special, like he's waiting for something big to happen."

"Me too, like he's calculating. Old Quil's been hinting at something with me."

"Why hasn't anyone been looking at me funny?" Bina cried, looking personally insulted.

"You wouldn't want it." Quil replied quickly.

"I'm glad it's not me." Seth said sadly. He'd been absorbing all of our emotions during this, he was such a sensitive little guy.

"I'm glad it's not you either." I grinned at Seth. "You're such a young'un."

"I'm not a young'un." He argued, crossing his arms over his chest. "Am I Jake?"

"Nope, you're grown up for your age, little buddy." Jake reached over and mussed up his hair. Seth's eyes shined with the appraisal.

"Grown up enough for me." Bina sidled closer to him, and slid her hand into his. Seth's tan cheeks filled with a dark red as he looked away, embarassed.

"Oh geez, again, really Bine?" Quil ran a hand through his hair, then set his shoulders as he pushed through their entwined hands. Seth protested as Bina giggled wildly. Quil put a hand on Seth's shoulder. "Listen, you don't go and start with her. She doesn't want you for your charms and wonderful personality. She wants you for your innocence."

"She's a sucuubus, Seth." Jake put in helpfully. Seth looked over a Bina, eyes wide, but she only tossed her long hair over her shoulder.

"Embry would have stopped this. He took care of me." She said haughtily.

"Which is exactly why I have to step in here." Quil nodded, looking solemn. "Pick up his slack."

"I miss Embry." Leah said quietly. I looked over at her, walking silently beside us, two large sweaters, sweatpants and rubber boots on. She was a terrible sight with no makeup and her hair dirty from not showering often. I reached out to her, but she shrank away from my touch, almost subconciously.

Suddenly there was two short honks behind us, and we all turned around to see who it was. It was the Chief in his squad car inching towards us.

"Hey Bells, I'm going home right now, are you coming with?" Charlie yelled out the window. I looked up at Jake and back at Charlie.

"Yeah Dad, I'm coming with you." I replied. I stood on the tips of my toes for a quick kiss from Jake. His warm, yielding lips met mine in a soft, quick kiss. I gave Bina a one armed hug, messed up Quil and Seth's hair and ran to the car.

"See you later guys." I waved at them before jumping in. Charlie turned around and drove out of the reservation.

"So, how are you guys holding up?" Charlie asked conversationally, honking at Billy, who was sitting out on the step as we passed.

"Leah's not doing so well. She looks awful lately." I replied.

"Yeah, I saw her. It's a shame."

"And it's all Sam's fault for starting all of this." I said angrily. After all, it was Sam's fault that Embry was gone, that Leah was a mess.

"That Sam Uley boy is a good kid. Don't be badmouthing him."

"No, he's not. Haven't you noticed Embry's been hanging out with him. He's shaved off all his hair, and they just follow Sam aorund like a cult." I replied. To my surprise, Charlie laughed.

"You're jealous?"

"Yeah. I want Embry back. It makes even Jake grumpy."

"Heaven forbid, an angry teenage boy." Charlie was still laughing.

"Dad, it's not funny." I couldn't help myself, I started laughing too. I gave him a light punch on the shoulder.

"What do you say we go to the Grill for supper tonight?" He asked suddenly."I'm pretty sure I have my wallet on me." He started digging around in his pockets.

"Yeah, I'm good with some fried, greasy food." I tossed his wallet at him from the cup holder in the console.

"Excellent. I'm craving some undercooked beef."

"That's gross." I made a face. Charlie pulled in the parking lot of the restaurant, parking and almost running to the door. It wasn't a fancy place, just a small grille outside the town that made quite a bit of money from the elderly who liked to hang out, as well as the teenagers. They served greasy, fatty foods and nothing less. But they made the most delicious suppers I've ever tasted. I followed Charlie to a table near where the waitresses hung out, but they knew Charlie well enough that one broke from the crowd and danced over.

"Good evening Chief, Bella." She smiled at us through a pink bubble of gum. "I'll take a stab in the dark here, but the usual?"

"You know it." Charlie smiled up at the girl and she danced back over, placing our order on the wheel, yelling out who it was. Minutes later, she brought us a coke and chocolate milk.

"Thank you. So, you've been pretty down lately. Anything else going on besides the obvious?" Charlie asked gruffly, cracking his fingers.

"No, I don't feel like socializing any lately." I sighed, leaning my head on my hand. "In school, I mean. They're really nice, I like them, but lately I feel like something is going to happen to Jake, like a gut feeling, you know?"

"I know, I've been feeling the same way." Charlie nodded, understanding. "But, I never got to say that I'm sorry that I pulled you off the Reservation, it just seemed more sensible to."

"It's fine. I miss the Tribe School sometimes, but I get to see my old friends like, every day. I knew it was for your job."

"It's good that you made friends, I was really worried. You've always had Jake as a crutch."

"I wouldn't consider him a crutch." I furrowed my eyebrows at him, but he merely stared back. The waitress set our food in front of us with a snap of her gum, Charlie had a baked potato with a meduim rare steak and a mixture of veggies on the side. I had a chicken burger with mozza sticks and coleslaw.

"Fine, not a crutch, but you're always together." Charlie grumbled before digging in.

"How's your policing?" I tried steering the conversation away from Jake.

"It's great. It's almost like crime doesn't happen in the town, you know there's been talk of a couple large bears seen around hiking trails, but other than that, Forks is quiet." I believe that even though Charlie was Chief, he never craved any sort of action, which is why he stayed in the small towns like Forks and on the reservation.

"Well, it's good that we didn't move farther away, like Phoenix or something of the sort." I stated. Charlie looked up at me, his eyes widening for a small second, his face a look of shock. But before I could blink, he had composed it. "What?"

"Nothing, nothing." Charlie shook his head and shoved a large chunk of potato in his mouth. "Eat." He said, so I picked up my burger and took a bite.

We sat for the rest of the meal just eating our food, and commenting on it. Charlie and I had never been very close, but we put up with each other, because we were all the blood family we had. Sure; Charlie had Sue, Harry and Billy, but I think he liked the dinners with me. It gave him a chance to hear the happenings in my life and make sure that I wasn't steering towards drugs or anything like that. I guess you could say it was his weird way of showing affection.


	13. Contention

_Billy had always been an excellent story teller. He was great enough to hold even a child's attention from start to finish with no interruptions from the listener. His face became haunted, his voice dark and ominous. Every night I stayed at Jake's, we would beg him to tell us a story before we went to sleep._

_"Please Dad?" Jake would ask, folding his hands in front of his face._

_"Please Billy?" I'd chime in, and we would both give him the cutest puppy dog eyes we could manage. This was long before diabetes had taken the life out of his legs and he would pull us both up onto his lap, obliging to our begging and sigh. We would remain quiet for as long as it took for him to conjure up a great story that we so looked forward to all day. Some were stories passed from long ago ancestors, and some were silly, but they were always interesting._

I jumped out of my truck and stared into the misty, grey morning. It was finally Friday, and I was excited for a weekend of nothing but Jake. I only had to get through today and I was homefree until next Monday.

"Bella. Bella?" I suddenly became aware of a hand waving in front of my face.

"Oh, hey." I smiled, focusing on Mike's round face.

"Guess what's happening tonight, doll?" He asked me, his blue eyes glistening with anticipation.

"What?" I replied, guarded. He was not doing anything to ruin my weekend, was he? Mike reached up and cupped my chin in my hand.

"We're planning on going to the movies tonight." I leaned back, making him drop his hand. "And you and Drake are definitely invited to come with us."

"Jake." I corrected.

"That's what I said," Mike replied, raising his eyebrows at me, then muttering, "Philip, Jack, whatever."

"So, uh, who's all going?" I asked, trying to get him away from his name game.

"The whole group, shebang, posse. We're all planning on going to the theatre in Port Angeles. Tonight. You plus one." He grinned at me. "You with?"

"Yeah, I'll go with you guys."

"Great, I'm getting my mom's van to take us all, no worries about drives. Just be at my house at, say seven."

"Alright." I replied, turning and walking towards the building, Mike right beside me. I went in and sat beside Angela, who looked at me happily, greeting me with a smile.

"Hey." said, sitting down beside her. Mike sat in front of us and turned around to talk.

"You've obviously heard. There's no way Mike could have contained his excitement that long." Angela rolled her eyes jokingly at Mike, who puffed his chest out in response. "Are you in?"

"Yeah, it sounds like fun." I replied.

"I told you she'd come." Angela gave Mike a pointed look.

"Who'd come where?" Ben leaned his chair back on two legs, looking at all of us in turn.

"Movies, Ben." Angela replied, "You remember we're going tonight."

"Oh, totally." He stood up and made some karate moves. "We should see a kung fu flick. One came out today, I forget the name, but it looks really good."

"No way." I put in, laughing. "I'd keep thinking of you trying to do karate just there."

"Yeah Ben, they're not supposed to be comedies." Mike said. Ben punched Mike on the arm before sitting back down.

"Let's go to a horror movie." I suggested, I'd always had a thing for horror movies. Mike cringed slightly at the suggestion.

"I don't know about that. What about some chick flick, like the Time Traveller's Wife?" Mike's face showed effeminacy as he spoke and I did all I could to bite back laughter.

"I want to see the new Disney movie." Angela argued, smiling politely.

"It looks like majority is going to rule here." Ben sighed. "It's too bad only me and Connor like the kung fu movies."

The bell rang, cutting our conversation short as I joined Eric outside the door for English. By the time lunch came around, everyone was debating over what movie we should go and see, as everyone wanted to see a different movie, and were arguing why we should see it. I sat, eating an apple and drinking chocolate milk, squeezed between Angela and Connor, listening and laughing. I was excited for tonight, I couldn't wait.

"Guys. I don't know why you don't see my side!" Ben argued. He stood up, just like this morning and tried a roundhouse kick. There was a 'fwap' sound as his foot connected with an unsuspecting girls butt. She turned around, her mouth falling open. "Oh, sorry!" Ben said instantly, his eyes widening in embarrassment.

"No, it's okay. I should have been watching." She looked at the floor, her cheeks flushing. "Well, bye." She hurried off across the cafeteria, after which everyone burst out laughing.

"Well, I still think a Kung Fu movie is in order." Ben said, shrugging and sitting down.

"I'll second that." Connor threw in, nodding.

"Yuck, no way." Lauren threw her nose up at Ben and Connor. Unfortunately enough, she decided to come with us tonight. The invitation was extended by Jessica, who had ignored the group's protests. "They're showing the old Casablanca. All guys have to put up with it sooner or later."

"I've seen it, I'll see it again." Mike replied, earning him a chorus of 'no's' from the guys and some food thrown at him.

"Horror is always the way to go." I replied, trying to convince them.

"You know, we haven't seen a horror in a long time. It's always love, or fighting or action movies that we go see." Jessica threw in, on my side with the movie thing. I gave her a thankful smile.

"See? Point proven." I grinned, but Lauren gave me a scathing look.

"No, point not proven, Bella." she said, unnecessarily meanly.

"Lauren, cheer up or chill out or something." Tyler said, rolling his eyes. "No one wants to hear it." Lauren only snorted indignantly.

"Action movie?" Eric asked, looking around.

"How about we decide when we get there?" Jessica suggested, shutting everyone up.

"Then we won't get into any movie." Eric cried. "We'll just argue the whole time."

"We'll vote." Mike suggested. I laughed.

"A vote sounds like some people won't be happy." I said. "Why don't we just go see a bunch of movies?"

"I don't think that will work."

"They always play a bunch of movies for two dollars every day on March break, all for two dollars." Eric said.

"It's not near March though." Jessica protested.

"Bells going to ring." Connor said, looking at the large clock above the doorway. "We still haven't decided."

"We're awful at this." Angela sighed. "Why can't we ever decide?"

"Does this happen every time?" I asked, looking at Angela.

"Sadly, yes." It was Mike who answered. "Every time we fight about it."

"I never win either." Jessica pouted.

It was then that the bell rang, signalling that it was time to go to fifth period class. I threw my apple core in the garbage, and grabbing my book bag, walked into Biology with Mike and Angela. I went to the table next to my seat-mate, and he looked curiously over at me as I sat down at the desk.

"Good afternoon." Edward said politely.

"Hey." I replied, grabbing my binder and textbook out of my bookbag. I threw them on the desk along with a pen.

"How are you?" I could feel his gold eyes on me, and a shiver ran down my back.

"I'm great. You?" I replied, looking straight ahead.

"I'm well. You're excited for something." He stated.

"Yeah, I guess. How did you know?" I finally turned and met his eyes. They were full of curiosity and confusion.

"You just look excited." He replied obviously, levelling his stare to mine.

"Oh, well... that makes sense." I replied, with a small amount of difficulty. His eyes seemed to be sucking me in.

"Where are you going?" His voice was soft now, like fine velvet as he spoke.

"To see a movie." I replied, trying to tear my eyes away. It was useless, I just couldn't seem to.

"Oh, that sounds exciting. What movie?"

"We don't know yet."

"Oh? Would you mind if I tagged along?" I had to blink. Yes, blink. I closed my eyes and suddenly the tie was broken. I let out a huge breath of air and dug my knuckles into my eyes.

"I don't know. I'd have to ask Mike. He's driving us there, but I don't think there's room."

"Alright." Edward accepted, smiling slightly.

"Alright what?" I stole a glance at him.

"You can ask." He said.

"I don't think that this is a good night to come." I said, nervously. To my surprise, Edward chuckled.

"Relax, I was joking. I'd never force my company onto someone." His voice was soothing and convincing. I sighed in relief.

"Oh good." I said. "Well, what are you going to be up to tonight then?" I was becoming pretty good at steering the topic off of uncomfortable things.

"I'm going out for supper with my family." He half-smiled over at me.

"Sounds like fun." I smiled back.

"Well, if you think so." He replied, his voice adopting a dark edge.

"Sure..." I replied, looking up and paying attention to Mr. Banner.

The rest of the class was spent trying not to talk to Edward, his voice had become kind of dark. It seemed that every time I came to this class, he became more chatty and it seemed like he was trying to get my attention. I sat it through and was relieved to get through gym class, where we played soccer. I'd never tell anyone, but it was a sport I thoroughly enjoyed, even if I wasn't any good at it. I tried my hand at defense, and knocked a few other players over in my rush to get the ball, and kicked it up the field a couple times, resulting in goals. By the end of gym, the teacher was complimenting me on my tackling skills.

Mike met me as I came out of the changing room and we were walking out the gym doors, when Coach Clapp called out, cutting Mike off mid-sentence.

"Oh, Bella. Can I talk to you for a moment?" I stopped, and turned around slowly, reluctantly.

"Sure." I said. "I'll see you in a few minutes." I waved to Mike. He gave me a questioning look, but continued out the door.

"I know I already complimented you on your playing skills, and I know the season is almost over, but I want to suggest that you join the soccer team. Now, or any upcoming years. With some training, I think that you can do really well." Coach Clapp said, obviously a long-winded woman.

"I'm really, really clumsy. I don't think that I'd be an asset to the team in any way." I stammered.

"We have lots of clumsy girls on our team, and we're looking for more fullback players." Coach said. "I coach the girl's team, and most of our positions are off to a good start."

"Well, thanks, but I'll have to think about it." I said, turning to go.

"I want you to really think about it. You could be a great player." She called after me.

"See you later." I replied, smiling and waving. When I got out the door, I let out a huge breath of air, relieved to get out of there. Nobody had ever asked me to join a sports team in my entire life.

"So, what was that about?" Mike asked, coming up behind me. I jumped up in surprise. "And why are you so jumpy?"

"Coach asked me to join the soccer team." I said.

"Wow, hardly anyone gets that kind of invitation. Are you going to do it?" Mike hopped beside me, obviously excited.

"I told her I'd have to think about it." I replied.

"You should definitely do it!" Mike said, getting way too worked up.

The parking lot was almost empty by this time, only a few cars left. Mike walked me to my truck, chattering about the invitation that Coach Clapp had extended.

"Well, I'll see you later, Mike." I said as he took in a breath. He looked surprised at the sudden closing

"Oh okay. I'll see you either at or before seven." Mike said, closing my door. I waved a last time and drove out of the parking lot, and back to my house.

The phone rang just as I was walking down the hallway towards the kitchen.

"Hello?" I asked into the phone, flipping through the mail.

"Bells." The warm, throaty voice greeted me.

"Jake! Your timing was impeccable." I cried, he laughed.

"What are you up to?"

"Just got home, actually. You?"

"Got home a few minutes ago. We're seeing each other today, aren't we?"

"Of course."

"Bina's been bugging me all day to call and make sure she'll see you today."

"Oh."

"What?"

"You have to come over here today."

"Why's that?" He laughed.

"Tell you when you get here, love. Make sure you smell nice and have showered" I said into the phone, and then hung up. I knew that Jake would find a way over here, if he had to walk. Meanwhile, I made my own way up into my room to do the homework I had and then to shower.

A couple hours later, I walked down the stairs, head covered in a towel and body covered in a bathrobe. As I reached the bottom of the stairs, Jake opened the door, tall and dark, his long hair tied back and looking casual in a fitted white v-neck and dark jeans.

"Hi!" I said brightly.

"Hi." He smiled, his teeth impossibly white. I stepped into his arms and he gave me a tight hug. "You look unready."

"Just got out of the shower.' I replied.

"You smell delicious." He nuzzled his nose into the crook of my neck.

"Allow me to go get decent."

"You're already decent." I felt him smile. I tried to pull away, but he pulled me in tighter.

"Jake." I cried, he laughed.

"Fiiinnneee." He sighed, letting go, but he couldn't keep the smile off his face.

"Give me a minute." I said, giving him a quick kiss before bounding up the stairs.

"I'll just have something to eat." He called up the stairs. I pulled off my robe, throwing it into a corner and throwing on a white tank top and a dark blue v-neck. I threw on light blue jeans and dried my hair off, letting it fall wherever it wanted to and put on some deoderant. I sprayed some body mist into my cleavage, and another spray on my stomach.

"Oh, you weren't kidding about the food thing." I said, coming into the kitchen. Jake was leaning against the counter eating tortilla chips and salsa.

"I'm a little hungry." He replied.

"Did you make yourself a sandwich?" I asked, looking in the fridge.

"Yeah." He answered, and I closed the fridge. I walk over and fell against him, wrapping my arms around his waist.

"So, darling Bella. Pray tell what you wanted me here for?"

"Why wouldn't I want you here?" I smiled at him.

"The real reason, silly." He flicked the end of my nose.

"Mike invited us to the movies tonight." I grinned at him. His eyes lit up.

"Ooh, your friends. This is great." He said, genuinely happy.

"Do you really think so?"

"Any friends of yours, I'm excellent with. I'm excited."

"Good, I'm excited too, but we haven't decided on a movie yet." I said, Jake's forehead wrinkled in thought.

"Horror." He stated.

"That's what I said." I replied. "By the way, you smell really good." I just noticed his subtle smell, and buried my nose into his shirt.

"You told me to smell nice." Jake said, chuckling. He ran a hand over my hair.

"We should go." I said, taking his hand. I grabbed the keys to the truck and drug him outside,

"Where exactly are we going?" Jake asked behind me.

"Mike's,"

"Mike's? Are... you sure that's a good idea?" He asked, sounding worried. I stopped in my tracks and turned around.

"Jake, it's perfectly okay." I said, looking into his dark eyes.

"Well, alright." He complied. I turned around and looked around the yard.

"How'd you even get here?" I asked, seeing no car.

"A friend of Dad's was coming out this way, so I grabbed a ride with him."

"Neat, neat." I said, hopping into the truck. Jake stepped into the passenger seat.

"How about no alcohol tonight?" Jake teased, grabbing my hand.

"It's not a party, silly. Just a movie. Maybe some food."

We drove for a little while, listening to the crackly radio, Jake singing along with the songs. I slowed down, and pulled into the police station.

"Why are we going here?"

"I have to tell Charlie where I'm going." I said, getting out of the truck and going into the building. Jake followed right behind me. I saw Charlie as soon as I entered the building, he greeted us with a smile.

"Hey Dad." I said, smiling.

"Hey Bells, hey Jake." He said, greeting us.

"Jake and I were invited to a movie tonight with my friends from school." I said. He smiled at me.

"It's good that you're not hiding out anymore." Charlie said.

"Yeah, so we're due at Mike's now." I said, I gave Charlie a hug before turning to go.

"Wait, Bells." He said, reaching into his pocket.

"Dad, you don't have-"

"I want to. You're my only daughter." He pulled out thirty dollars and handed it to me. "Now go have some fun."

"Thanks Dad. See you later." I said, bouncing out the door.

"Bye Chief." Jake said before exiting as well. I started the truck and took off as Jake closed the passenger side door.

"Are you sure you're sure about this Bells?" Jake asked, worry still lacing his voice. I cupped his warm face with my hand.

"Jake," I said, but stopped. He had always been a lot warmer than me, but his face felt too warm, like it was burning up. "Do you have a fever?"

"Don't change the subject, Bella." Jake warned, he growled at me.

"I don't want you to be out and sick though." I protested.

"No, I feel great, as always." Jake felt his own face. "I'm not even warm."

"Well, alright." I said, looking at him. He took my hand and squeezed it reassuringly.

We pulled into Mike's house only moments later, as he lived just outside the busiest part of town. I drove down the long driveway.

"Are you ready for how my friends are normally?" I asked, smiling.

"I'm excited to hang out with them." He replied.

"Be warned though."

"I just hope they don't gape at me this time." He chuckled.

"They're cool with you." I said. I turned the truck off and turned to him.

"Yeah, except for the fact that last time Angela and Jessica looked at me like I was some God." Jake rolled his eyes, but smiled to show me he was joking.

"Are you kidding me? You look like a Native-American Narcissus. Well, except for the cruelness and narcissistic character." I said, furrowing my eyebrows.

"I know what you mean, and I think you're just biased." He said, he slid over in the seat and tilted my head up to his, ever so softly brushing his lips against mine.

"Bella and Jake are here!" Jessica's loud voice suddenly broke through us as she opened the truck door. I turned around and she grabbed my hand and pulled me out of the truck, Jake right behind me.


	14. Vicissitude

_I remember every time that I've ever gotten sick, Jake has been there. He would come over, pull me into his arms and hold me until I had to run to the bathroom to throw up, or until I felt better. He would make me soup, or act as a blanket and would sit through any movie or game or anything he had to. I don't remember him ever getting sick. He was always healthy: nothing would slow him down and he always took care of me. He still does, but I don't know if I know how to take care of him._

Jessica drug me inside, into Mike's living room, where Angela, Mike, and Eric were sunk into the big couches, talking and drinking cans of Coke.

"Guys! Bella and Jake are here! I can't believe you guys actually showed up. We didn't think you would." Jessica gushed, sitting me down on the couch and sinking into it next to me.

"Hey Bella." Angela smiled over and moved so that she was sitting next to Jessica.

"You look really nice tonight Jake." Jessica said, grinning. Angela nodded, and I saw what Jake meant, and had to keep myself from laughing.

"That's a nice shirt." Angela agreed.

"Thanks." Jake said, blushing slightly from the attention.

"Hey Bella!" Mike said, leaning forward. "We're waiting on Tyler, Connor and Ben." He rolled his eyes.

"Wait," Said Eric, sitting forward and holding up a finger. His eyes narrowed in concentration as everyone quieted. "Here comes Ben and Connor." And just like he said, they pulled into the driveway.

"Wow, you have really great hearing." Angela said, her eyebrows raised in shock.

"Ben's got a loud car," He shrugged, grinning.

"Hey guys." Ben came in, followed by Connor and smiled around.

"Hey, do you know where Tyler is?" Mike asked, glancing his way.

"Leaving, as far as I know." Connor replied, shrugging and glancing at his phone. Ben sat down next to Angela, leaning towards her in the most obvious way.

"Shouldn't we wait for Lauren?" Jessica asked, turning to Mike.

"I told her to meet us at Ben's house, that's where we all were going to be" Mike replied.

"No! That's mean." Jessica said loudly, pulling out her phone. She began typing a furious message, obviously to be sent to Lauren. I felt Jake shift next to me, and I turned to him.

"Not sure where to jump in?" I whispered up at him.

"I don't know." He said back.

"Don't worry, right now they're just freaking out. The drive will be a lot better." I said, nuzzling into his side. He put his arm around me, enveloping me in warmth.

"So, do we have to wait for Lauren now?" I threw in.

"I hope not." Eric muttered. "No one wants her here. Wait, we can leave now." Tyler pulled into the yard and parked behind my truck. I stood up. Jake followed suit and we went outside.

"Hey Bella! Bella's other half." Tyler called out.

"Hey!" I replied as Jake waved.

"You guys ready to head out?" Tyler asked the general group, who had already congregrated out in the yard.

"Yeah, let's get in." Mike pointed over to the van.

"Nice ride." Jake said jokingly, eyeing it.

"Well, we don't care how we get there, as long as there's room for us all." Mike replied, grinning. "It's such a loser vehicle though."

"It doesn't even look like there's going to be room for all of us here anyway." I grunted, plopping in the spot in the back beside Jake.

"I don't think there'll be enough seatbelts, but we'll all fit." Mike eyed the seats from up front as Jessica slid into the passenger seat, Ben, Angela and Connor into the bucket seat in the middle, and Eric beside me.

"Your guys' addition makes us have a very full van." Tyler said, looking at the filled seats.

"You could sit on my lap." Eric winked at Tyler, rubbing his leg for effect, which got a laugh out of everyone. Mike turned around again and looked at everyone.

"Jake, would you mind Bella sitting on your lap?" Mike asked.

"Not at all." Jake opened his arms to me as I unbuckled and I climbed onto his legs, sitting sideways. Eric slid over and Tyler climbed in beside him.

"Great. I'm such a problem solver." Mike beamed over at Jessica as he started the van.

"So, are we picking up Lauren?" Tyler asked, disgust laced through his voice.

"Yes." Jessica said firmly. She's waiting at Ben's right now." There was a colective sigh heard all through the van.

"Where's she going to sit?" Eric asked, looking around.

"She can sit on like, Connor's lap." Jessica replied.

"No. She's not sitting on my lap." Connor protested immediately.

"Not it." Eric threw in.

"Me neither." Tyler said.

"I'm not doing it." Ben replied.

"Well, I can't do it." Mike put in. "I'm the driver."

"So, who is this Lauren?" Jake asked, breaking the debate up. Connor turned around, as if he was sizing Jake up.

"She's like the reincarnation of Satan. I wouldn't speak to her." Ben nodded along with it.

"And here she is." Mike said, slowing down. Lauren stood, hip cocked to the side, arms crossed, with a furious and condesending look on her face. The sliding door opened and she looked at all of us in turn, then got in and wedged herself between Eric and Tyler.

"Mike, how dare you tell me to meet you guys at Ben's" Lauren started in as soon as she got comfortable.

"Would you believe that I didn't want you to come with us?" Mike threw at her.

"No, I wouldn't." She replied.

Everyone fell silent as Mike drove through Forks and pulled onto the highway But suddenly Lauren leaned forward and looked over at me and Jake. I had a feeling that we were going to be the object of her verbal abuse now.

"So," She started, and I cringed. "Jake, how did you end up with someone like Bella?"

"We've known each other for ever and..." Jake started, but she cut him off.

"So you settled."

"No, that's not it."

"To make your parents happy?"

"That's not even..."

"So then why are you with her, you're better than average." She sneered. Jake's arms curled around me, subconciously pulling me away from her.

"Because I love her." Jake replied, like it was obvious.

"If that's what you want her to think. You know there are better out there."

"Lauren," I started in angrily, but someone cut me off.

"Lauren that's enough. Stop trying to make yourself feel better by putting Bella down. Jake will never be with you." Angela's angry voice cut through Lauren, and she looked surprised, her mouth flopping open and shut like a fish. Apparently Angela didn't often get angry, and it was shown as everyone else looked at her, eyebrows raised. Nothing was said for a long time in the sheer shock of it.

"Okay, wow." Ben said, breaking the silence, running a hand through his hair, then turned around. "So, Jake. We're still undecided about a movie tonight. Do you have a preference?"

"I'm down with the horror movie." He replied. Ben looked at him, surprised.

"You guys have been together for too long." Eric laughed. "Bella wanted horror too."

"It's a great movie choice." I said, giggling. "Who doesn't want to scare themselves once in a while?"

"Scary movies scare me." Jessica threw back.

"Me too, I don't like them." Angela said softly.

"Wait, I've got it." Eric said, holding up a hand.

"Science fiction for you?" Tyler joked.

"No. Don't be stupid. Romantic Comedy." He looked proud of himself as Jessica, Angela and Mike agreed.

"Or just comedy." Jake said slowly. Tyler, Ben and Connor agreed with him. "There's a new American Pie movie in theatres."

"They're good movies." Eric agreed, along with everyone else.

"Wow. I can't believe we just decided." I laughed.

"It must be Jake." Jessica put in.

"Why thank you." Jake said, fluttering his eyelashes and grinning.

"Oh Port Angeles." Eric said, looking out the window, "How I missed thee."

"Where do you say we eat?" Mike asked, slowing down to the speed limit.

"Sub shop!" I screamed out before anyone else could suggest anywhere. "And you're all okay with it." I grinned at them all.

"Well, I'm alright with it." Eric shrugged.

"So am I." Ben and Connor said. The rest agreed as we pulled into the small parking lot.

"I'm not happy with this plan." Lauren put in, but no one rose to take the bait. She quieted after that.

We got inside and got in line to order our meal, everyone chattering happily.

"Jake, what do you want?" I asked, looking up at him.

"I'm not sure if I'm hungry." He replied.

"Oh, come off it. You're always hungry." I smiled, punching him lightly in the stomach. He caught my hand.

"Alright, I'll have a six inch." He replied after a couple minutes.

"That's better." I said. "Is one drink okay?" I pulled out my money, but Jake stopped me, reaching into the back pocket of his jeans.

"No. No. I'm going to pay." I said, stopping his hand.

"You're not paying." He said firmly.

"Fine, then let Charlie pay." I said, even more so. He looked at me for a couple of seconds before sighing and dropping his wallet back into his pocket.

We finally got our order, ate and piled back into the van, making it to the theatre in good time. We got our tickets and snacks and settled in the middle of the showroom to watch.

"Has anybody seen a preview or anything for this movie?" Mike asked as he sat down.

"Actually, I didn't know it was here." Eric replied.

"Well, all the other American Pie movies were great." Jake shrugged.

"They were." Jessica said. "Meaning that this one has to be good."

"That's so true." Tyler said. The lights then dimmed, and the previews started, causing everyone to quiet down. I settled against Jake, taking his hand.

About an hour in, Jake's hand clenched around mine, not just once, but a few times in succession. I glanced over at him, and found his head back on the headrest, chest rising more than it should be. I saw small beads of sweat on his forehead, which was unusual. Jake didn't often sweat. I thought back to earlier this afternoon, when I noticed his fever, and how quiet he'd been all afternoon.

"Jake." I whispered, leaning closer. The heat coming off him was unbelieveable. He turned his head towards me, eyes fevered as they sweeped my face.

"I have to go. Bathroom." He whispered raggedly, then was up in a flash and gone out of the room. I glanced over at Angela on the other side, who looked worriedly over.

"What's going on?" She mouthed at me. I shrugged and she responded with a "Go." and made a shooing motion.

I slipped out and sat down on the stairs outside. I only had to wait a couple minutes before Jake stepped out, looking worse in the flourescent light.

"Hey." I said softrly. His head whipped around, eyes meeting mine. He walked over and sat down next to me.

"Hey." He replied.

"Are you okay?" I asked, looking up at him, his hair had fallen loose from it's restaint, and now fell around his face.

"Yeah, I'm fine."

I gave him what I hoped to be my most skeptical look, and a brief smile flashed across his features.

"I knew there was no fooling you." He said, pulling me onto his lap, and cradling me. I wrapped my arms around his middle, pulling myself tight to him..

"That's what I thought." I stated. "Now, are you really okay?"

"I'm not feeling all too well. A little worse for wear." He closed his eyes, and I placed a soft kiss on his cheek. His arms tightened around me.

"So, like, what kind of sick? Are you wanting to go home?" I asked, running my thumb over his strong jaw.

"I don't know how to explain it. I..." He stopped. "I'll go home when the rest of you do."

"But you don't look good." I protested. "You're a little pale, sweating. You don't get sick."

"Bells." Jake gave me a heartbreaking smile. "Just settle down. I'll be okay until we get back. I'll deal."

"Whoa man, you look terrible." Mike's voice came from behind us. He and Jessica stood there, staring at Jake. "Do you need to go home?"

"No. You finish watching the movie." Jake said, waving it off. Mike didn't look convinced.

"I dont know... You don't look normal sick." Now he looked worried.

"We can go home. We will." Jessica's eyebrows pulled upwards.

"I want you guys to go watch the movie." Jake pointed to the doors. "It looks really funny."

"Okay, but you tell me if you absolutely need to go home." Mike walked up and gave Jake and man-shake and drug Jessica back into the theatre room.

After a while, Jake said he was feeling better, and after going in the bathroom to splash water on his face, we went back into the showroom, sitting down in remote seats near the back. I kept looking over at Jake, worried, but he seemed to be containing it well. The movie ended and the rest of the group filtered out, meeting us at the doors.

"We should go back now." Ben said, he had caught onto how Jake was feeling.

The rest of the drive home was silent, everybody tired from the long day and excitement. Jake huddled in the corner, sweating. I felt helpless, like I couldn't do anything to help him. Mike drove back to his house, and I drove Jake to his, pulling in and turning the truck off.

"Do you want me to go home tonight?" I asked, wanting to stay, but not wanting to violate his wishes.

"I do." Jake replied, towering over me in front of the truck. "I don't really want you to see me like this."

"Then I'll leave." I said, defeated. I stood on the tips of my toes, meeting his soft lips.

"Don't worry about me. I'll call you tomorrow,"

"Just so you know, I don't want to leave you." I said.

"I know," He smiled.

"Talk to you tomorrow then." I sighed, Jake turned to go, but I caught his hand and pulled him back. "I love you, Jakie." He grinned down at me, eyes crinkling at the edges.

"I love you too, Bells." He said, his voice rough. He gathered me into a tight hug, kissing the top of my head.

"Night Jake." I whispered, I couldn't help the nagging feeling that something was going to change, something drastic was going to happen. I sighed and got in my truck.


	15. Devoid

I was splayed on the couch, head hanging over the arm, cordless phone cradled in my hand. I was exhausted. I hadn't slept well last night, it was more or less tossing and turning just below the depths of conciousness. I had been up since five, and it was eleven now. I had called the Black residence twice already, and received no answer both times. Desperately, I picked up the phone and dialed in the seven numbers one more time.

The phone clicked, then rang. Once, twice, thrice and then four times.

"Hello?" A gruff voice said on the other end. I gasped and almost dropped the phone. "Hello?"

"Hi! It's Bella." I said quickly, recovering.

"Good afternoon Bella." Billy said. "If you're looking for Jake, he's sick and he's told me not to accept any visitors. I'm sorry." I swallowed.

"Well, what if I...?" I started, but Billy cut me off.

"Honey, don't try to come down here. He doesn't want you to see him like this."

"Alright." I said in defeat. The line was quiet for a small amount of time.

"Please don't. He'll see you when he sees you."

"Bye then."

"Bye."

The phone clicked, and I sat until it started to angrily beep. I fumbled with it before hanging it up, then went back to lazing on the couch, staring at the bright sunshine filtering through the window, which looked more than dull today. I can't believe that yesterday morning, I had been thinking that I was going to spend my whole weekend in Jake's arms. I never would have expected this as long as I lived. I dialed the same numbers again.

"Hello?" Billy asked.

"Hi Billy. Bella again. Why is it that I can't see Jacob?"

"He's sick and doesn't want visitors."

"I've never been kept from seeing him before."

"Well, please don't come down here."

"What if I do?" I tried to keep the venom from seeping into my voice, but it was present and I heard Billy take in a breath.

"Just don't. Okay?"

"I can't promise you that."

"Bella." Billy was begging now. "Jake's going through something. I don't want you to see it. It's bad. Just don't worry." I sighed in response and hit END on the phone. What was I going to do with myself? I felt like I was sinking into some kind of quicksand. I needed to get up and walk around, but I couldn't seem to get off of the couch.

It was hours later that I finally convinced myself to get up. I ran my hands through my greasy hair and stood up, immediately regretting it. My vision went hazy and my head buzzed, though I managed to keep myself upright until it went away and walked to the kitchen, where I decided that I wasn't hungry after catching myself staring at the fridge for a couple of minutes. I sauntered back into the living room, where I flopped onto the couch and did the same thing I was doing earlier: nothing.

I leapt off the couch as I heard the cruiser pull into the driveway and the front door open.

"Dad!" I yelled, running to the foyer.

"Well, hello Bella." Charlie said, looking surprised, then looked around me, checking for Jake.

"He's not here." I said sullenly.

"Is he hiding? Because I am not playing hide and seek again." Charlie said, his brows furrowing. I let out a short laugh.

"No, he's not even here." I followed Charlie to the kitchen, where he grabbed a beer and sat down at the table.

"Have you even been out of the house today?" He looked at me, tilting his head. "You're a little stir-crazy." I merely looked at him, sitting down at the chair across from him.

"Okay, I'll bite. Why isn't he here?" He cringed, which I hoped to be jokingly.

"He's sick. Billy won't let me see him."

"How many times have you called?"

"A couple." I looked away.

"Why didn't you just drive down there and see him?" Charlie sounded genuinely confused.

"Old man Bills told me not to even bother coming down there."

Charlie took this in, taking a long drink of his beer while he thought.

"Maybe I should call him." He said finally.

"No!" I jumped forward in my seat, throwing out a hand to stop him. I sighed. "It won't solve anything. I just don't know what to do."

"Well, Bells, I say you just go down there. You know you've got to fight in times like this." Charlie said, then made a shooing motion towards the door.

"Do you think so?" I asked, already at the doorway of the kitchen.

"Absolutely. Get out of here." He smiled.

I ran upstairs and threw on some sweatpants and my hair into a ponytail. I grabbed the truck keys and ran back downstairs, slipping on flats and stopping at the doorway of the kitchen.

"Thanks Dad." I grinned, then rushed out the door.

I pulled into the Black residence not too soon after, getting out and rushing to the closed door. I wasn't sure what to do at this point; I had always just been able to walk right in. Somehow I got the feeling that knocking would be necessary today. So I knocked, and I waited. But there was no answer. I knocked again, louder and longer, but there was no answer. As I was knocking the third time, the door opened an inch and Billy's coal black eyes peeked out at me.

"I thought I told you not to come down here." His deep voice resonated through the wood of the door and under my skin.

"I'm sorry, I just couldn't not come here." I said.

"Well, I'm sorry too." He replied, looking at me.

"Is-"

"Jacob's not here."

"Well, where is he?"

"Will you please just go home Bella?" He asked.

"I can't. Where's Jake, is he sleeping?"

"No."

"Is he with our friends?"

"No, er... yes. Yes he is."

"I thought he was really sick and couldn't accept visitors."

"He's feeling better."

"Oh, well you could have said that at first." I was utterly confused at where Billy was going with this.

"Yeah."

"Is he with anyone in particular? Quil? Seth? Leah or Bina? Embry?" The last name slipped out, even though I still considered him a part of our group.

"Yes, he's with Embry."

"Oh Embry." I stopped, my blood running cold. Last time I had checked, Embry was with Sam. Jake didn't like Sam.

"Alright, now it's settled." Billy said, and his dark hand gestured me away.

"No. Do you think I could come in?" I asked.

"I don't think that would be a good idea." He answered, his voice uninviting.

"We used to chat all the time." I protested, reaching a hand out and resting it against the door.

"I'm not feeling well today." He answered, quickly. Too quickly I narrowed my eyes in response and looked at him.

"It seems no one is feeling well today." I said, my teeth clenched together. Billy was really starting to piss me off and I was also confused and it just wasn't turning out to be a good day.

"Oh hello Bella." A cheery voice said behind me. I turned around and found Sue standing there, a brown paper bag in hand.

"Hello Sue." I replied.

"I have company Bella, please respect that." Billy said, still hiding behind the door. I bowed my head in response, slouching off to my truck. But I knew, and Billy should have known that I was determined, and I wasn't going to give up until I saw my Jacob. My sunshine. There would be no keeping me from him. I angrily started the truck and squealed the tires as I backed out, but no one was on the front step anymore for the effect to have any satisfaction. I pounded the steering wheel a couple times as my truck whined in protest at the fast speed that I was going. I drove up the mountain, the road precariuosly placed on the edge and came to a rough stop, sliding in the dirt. I turned the truck off, and got out, seeing Quil standing there, seemingly to have came out of nowhere.

"Hey Bells." He said casually, hands in pockets. I didn't return the greeting, merely threw my shoulder into his stomach, knocking him to the ground. I put my knee into his chest, holding him there. "What the hell?" Was all he could manage as he tried to fight back, manuevering around my blows to his body. My fists were flying at him, and he was trying to pull me into a hold. We rolled around, wrestling for a while, while I got my bearings and let out some pent up anger at today's events.

"I don't know where the FUCK Jacob is." I growled, trying to pull out of a headlock.

"Sam Uley." He grunted, pulling tighter.

"I know. What's up with that?" I let out an aggravated yell.

"Him and Embry both. In his cult." I got out of Quil's hold and swiped around to pin him down successfully.

"What are you doing up here?" I asked, leaning back and catching my breath. Quil sat up, leaning back on his hands.

"Same reaons you're up here." He replied sadly. "Angry. I bet you went to Billy's today, eh?"

"Yeah, wouldn't let me in." I said bitterly.

"He wouldn't even answer the door for me." Quil said. I looked into his sad, soft brown eyes

"Have you seen him?" I asked.

"No. I just know he's got to be with Sam." Quil repled.

"I'm not going to worry about it today. He was sick last night when I dropped him off." I stood up, held out a hand and pulled Quil up with me.

"They're both gone, and now I have to hang out with Bina." Quil looked down at his feet sadly. I stepped forward and gathered him into a tight hug, resting my chin on his shoulder. His arms were hesitant to wrap around me, but they finally did after what appeared to be an internal deliberation, securing me against his chest, small compared to Jake's massive one but well developed enough to feel nice.

"I know how you feel." I murmured, then stepped back. "But I think I'm going to go and sulk alone. Thanks for putting up with that."

"It was much needed. For the both of us." He nodded, then started walking again.

"Do you want a drive back home?" I said, hesitating.

"No, thanks, well... yeah, alright. It's not like I have anything better to do." He said, climbing in the cab.

"Great. He only accepts rides when he has nothing better to do. Ouch." I grinned, placing a hand over my heart.

"I didn't mean it that way, and you know it." Quil said, brooding.

"Sorry Quil," I replied, driving back down the dangerous road. Driving up hadn't been so bad, while I was angry, but as I drove down it, maneuvering around the tight corners, I was terrified.

"You'r e scared." Quil noted.

"Well, yeah. Do you see how bad this road is?" I asked incredulously as we bounced over a large pothole.

"Don't be scared. That's how people get into accidents." Quil breathed as I just missed hitting the shoulder of the road. "Shall I drive?"

"No, I can handle it." I protested, pressing the brakes. We were both silent as I made it down the last part of the road and pulled onto the safe paved part. Quil exhaled in relief as I pulled up to his house.

"Well thanks for getting me here alive. I was sure for most of that ride that it wasn't going to happen." He said, getting out and grinning at me. I smiled over at him.

"Then you have died an angry teenage boy." Quil still had a babyface, and he wasn't all that tall, he was burly with an impish grin, and he didn't have any of Jake's features, with his chiseled jaw, sparkling eyes and complete safeness. I shook myself for comparing them, I was only loading my loneliness onto Quil.

"Who was scared out of his wits." Quil countered. His grin lit up his dark eyes.

"I'll see you later buddy." I said, putting the truck in reverse.

"Later kid." He said closing the door before I could say anything, waved and disappeared into his house. I sat for a few minutes, my foot on the brake pedal and debating whether or not to go see Bina or not. I didn't think I could handle her perpetual happy bubbliness, or her bouncing around at the moment. My whole body was starting to ache with longing. Longing for Jake's warm hand, his soft touch..

_Settle down Bella. It's only been one day. _I slapped my cheek and drove home without thinking about it any farther.

I spent Sunday lazing around the house, doing my homework and scrubbing the whole house clean. I washed every available surface, cleaned my room, did the laundry, the dishes and cleaned the leaves off of the lawn. I was going a little crazy. I'd never gone more than twenty-four hours without Jake, I was so used to seeing him every single day, and I was definitely going through withdrawal. I had even looked up the symptoms online.

I walked into homeroom on Monday a mess. I had sloppily threw my hair into a ponytail, grabbed some sweatpants and sandals and went out the door. Mike looked at me, surprised and apalled as I sat down. I knew it was because I was so usually put together, always wearing jeans.

"Yes, I do own sweats." I grumbled as he opened his mouth to say something.

"Wow." He managed after some time.

"Bella, this is different." Ben said, looking around Angela.

"I'm sorry?" I said grumpily.

"I like it. It's a very natural look. Hot." Mike finally regained composure.

"Wait, I've seen this happen before." Ben said, tapping his finger against his chin, looking at the ceiling thoughtfully.

"Do I know what you're talking about?" Mike asked excitedly, mouth dropping open.

"A so usually put together femme who has a boyfriend is suddenly dressing in sweats and a pony, er.. thing." Ben started slowly. "Do I detect the scent of a newly single woman?" I sighed as I wiped my eye lazily.

"What?" Angela asked, then shooed away Ben and Mike. She scooted over closer to me. "What happened?" She asked in a low, caring voice. "I should have picked that up."

"I'm not even sure. Jake won't see me." I said truthfully. I didn't want to lie to Angela.

"As in, he won't return your calls, ignores you when he sees you?"

"Well, he's never home, or he's sleeping. His father won't let me in to see him and says he's sick, so I don't know what's going on." I sighed again.

"Oh dear. This isn't good." She said worriedly.

"We're not broken up. I'm just not sure what's happened." I said.

"Well Bella, you've always had it easy it appears. Everything will get better. It always does." She said soothingly, placing a hand on my arm. I sagged into my chair with the warm gesture. Then I looked over at Angela to thank her, and found something different, a kind of light and excitement behind her eyes.

"What's happened to you?" I asked, giving her a small smile. "Forget about my troubles. Tell me." Angela looked hesitant for a second, before breaking into a huge grin.

"Ben asked me out on a second date this weekend, Saturday night. I think it might be official." She squealed uncharacterisitically, her eyes crinkling up with the grin she had on.

"Oh that's so great!" I said, smiling with her. "It's about time."

"I know. I thougt he wouldn't even consider it, well, looking at how much taller I am."

"You guys are a perfect fit. Height doesn't even matter. He's totally into you." I reassured her.

"I sure hope so." She couldn't help smiling still, looking over at Ben.

Mike caught up with me as I was walking out of homeroom and put a hand on my arm.

"I don't want to rush into things, but I'm here for you Bella." He said, trying to catch my eye.

"Oh lay off it Mike." I replied. "I'm still with Jake."

"You can't blame a guy for trying with a girl like you." He winked. I blushed despite myself.

"Mike, stop." I swatted his arm as we walked into English.

The rest of the day was a blur. My friends kept me distracted and didn't mention the clothes again after the inital shock of it. But I knew when I sat down in my seat at Biology and Edward turned to me that it was going to be a bad hour.

"Good afternoon." He gave me a small smile as I sat down. "You look nice today. What's the occasion?"

"Hey." I said, throwing down my book. I looked around for Mr. Banner, but it appeared that he wasn't here yet. "Don't even mention the clothes."

"And why not, if I may?" He asked, turning his whole body toward me.

"I'm just not feeling up to it today." I grumbled at him.

"You're usually so well put together." His voice was soft, little more than a murmur. "Did something happen?" I turned toward him in my seat and stared at him, narrowing my eyes.

"Why would I share with you?" I asked, keeping my eyes trained on his. He stared back cooly, unblinking.

"I thought that, as a human being and teenager, you would want to rant about the bad part of your life at the moment." He replied.

"We barely even know each other, and we barely talk. There's no reason to share with you." I said, my bitterness coming to the surface. I wasn't trying to be this mean, it was overtaking my caring side and I couldn't bring myself back to the calm that I was usually.

"On the contrary Bella, I speak to you all the time. You don't reply." He said, and as I thought about it, he did talk to me a lot, I usually just nodded or answered yes or no. Suddenly he broke our eye contact showdown and looked past me.

"It seems we have a sub today." He mused.

"What?" I turned around, and sure enough a flustered woman walked in, arms loaded with bags, papers and books. Great, we had a substitute today, and there was no reason for me to ignore him, because she looked clueless.

"So, is there trouble in paradise?" He asked, jumping right back into the questioning. I grunted in reply. "Is he ignoring you? Not meeting your demands?"

"Whatever."

"Oh, so it is true. Did he break up with you? Not returning your calls? I know, he moved and the relationship isn't working. Hmm, He's bonked his head and got amnesia?" He ribbed.

"Will you stop it?" I roared at him. The class immediately quieted and stared at me. I waited until they turned back to what they were doing before I looked at him. He didn't even look surprised at my outburst.

"Well, I got some kind of reaction out of you." He cooed, smirking.

"He's sick, and I can't see him." I mumbled, turning my head away from him. I heard him chuckle softly.

"Then what brought this on?" I looked at him and he motioned at my clothes.

"Do I have to dress perfectly every day?" I asked outrageously.

"Not at all, but it seems a little extreme for a Monday." He replied, calm as ever.

"Any day of the week's good for me." I said. He didn't say anything for a few minutes.

"How long?" He asked quietly.

"How long what?"

"How long has it been since you seen him?"

"He was sick Friday night and I haven't seen him since I dropped him off." I said, sighing. It was all I seemd to be doing today.

"You must be worried." He said, lifting a thin brow.

"Only slightly." I said sarcastically. I dropped my chin to my hand, slouching more than I ever had. The sub didn't even commence class, she just sat at the desk, reading and obviously letting us do whatever we wanted. I checked the clock. Only eight minutes had passed since the bell rang.

"There's no need to be sarcastic. I'm genuinely concerned for your feelings." He said, sounding sincere. I wanted to believe him, but there was a part of me that didn't trust him.

"Are you? Someone whom I've never spoken with outside of Biology class?" I asked, tilting my head at him.

"Well, that could be changed, We could go somewhere for dinner." He said, his voice velvety soft. He leaned in towards me as he said it and I caught a waft of scent, something very sexy, and it was coming off of him. It wasn't cologne, but it was a delicious smell that I could have for the rest of my life, at that point I wished I could bottle it up and have it all to myself. I closed my eyes and breathed in deeply. But then it was gone, replaced by the smell of the classroom and I opened my eyes. I realized how far I was leaned over, and how far he was leaning away from me. I immediately sat up straight and he regained his composure.

"Are you asking me out?" I shook my head to clear my thoughts. I had surprised myself at that scent, at how weakly I had submitted to it. I had to admit though, it was a pretty seductive scent and it had rendered me useless of any resistance.

"Yes, you haven't answered yet though. I'm curious why you're putting it off." He murmured.

"I don't think that's a good idea. I'm still with Jake." I said nerviously. It was a weak moment, that was all. He didn't look put out in the least.

"I meant a friendly dinner." He replied, eyes soft. "But if you're uncomfortable with that, then I'm alright with you declining."

"Thank you." I breathed.

We chatted for the rest of the period, but I was exhausted by the time the bell rang. Sleep hadn't come easily last night or the past few nights and I wasn't feeling at all up to braving Gym and Coach Clapp, By some stroke of miracle, I avoided Mike coming out of Biology, so I snuck out to my truck, grabbed a blanket from behind the seat and laid down on the large cushion, staring at the red panel, thinking over what had happened to Jake to make him not want to see me. It was the point that I had reached, self-blame and Billy wasn't being any help to my current loathing.


	16. Bereft

Two weeks. It had been a whole two weeks since I'd seen Jake and I was becoming great at playing dead, at being catatonic. I hadn't gone to school in three days, I had actually felt felt physically sick the few weeks that I hadn't heard any news of Jacob. Billy had stopped taking my calls and pleas altogether and even Quil stopped replying to me: the last time we talked, he told me to 'get a grip', that the world wasn't ending. I was sinking deeper into my own self-propelled depression, and I was inconsolable.

Fourteen days was a long time to deal with my dark gloominess and despair. I had waken up each morning with less hope that the day that lie ahead would lead me to Jake. I had spiraled in a whirlwind of depression and loneliness and had pulled away from everyone, each day getting worse with my attire, not even caring, but there was nothing that I could do about it. I was grieving, I wanted nothing more than to see Jake's muscled, tanned body and feel his hands entwined with mine, or his hand on the small of my back, or even tangled in my hair. I had never credited myself as a needy person, someone that relied on other people to bring them happiness and make their world a better place. I hadn't realized that I wasn't so independent, that I relied on being with Jake a lot. I felt incomplete without him.

Currently I was laying in a puddle of my own drool, not able or even willing to move, or wipe my mouth. I was a sad sight, and I knew it. Even Charlie knew something was wrong, and he'd already laid it into Billy a couple times this week, much to my dismay. They currently weren't speaking, and it was mostly my fault. He came in every couple of hours with soup or hot chocolate, looking at me hopefully to see if I had regained any life yet. I must have looked more horrible every time he looked, because as soon as he glanced over, his face fell and he walked out, shoulders slumped, softly closing the door behind him. He always came back to pick up the untouched cups and bowls and to make sure I was still breathing.

Jessica had called a million times since, literally, and Angela had even extended her condolences. Mike had come over to see me, but I told Charlie to not let him into the house. I had concocted every single scenario imaginable in my mind, mostly horrible in the past few days that would explain why I hadn't seen Jake while I laid here, awake, but in a trance. I had come to accept the worst, and had begun my heart-tearing grief.

"Bella," Charlie said, opening the door and walking in. He looked at me, with the sad, 'she's pathetic' look that he'd adopted earlier this week. He'd finally accepted that I was going deeper into a hole, but he couldn't seem to figure out how to help me. "There are two people here to see you. They say you know them." I sat up, slurping up my drool, and then wiping the thick saliva off my cheek with the sweater I was wearing.

"Who?"

"Alice and Edward? Do you know them?" He asked, worry in his eyebrows. He turned, knowing my response would be to send them away. His mouth formed the words subconciously as he thought it over, looking down at me.

"I'm not sure I know them." I said, confused. I don't recall ever hearing the names together, ever. Unless it was Alice Grady who lived a couple minutes down the road. She was partially deaf and all crazy. I definitely didn't think that she'd come visit me. Nothing that the outside world knew of had happened to me.

"Oh Bella." A high soprano voice said from behind Charlie, full of shock. He moved to the side as he turned around, and I saw a very short girl with black hair and pale skin looking at me, hand poised over her mouth like she was modeling the ring she sported. I could only stare at her. I'd barely seen her around, but I knew she went to Forks High. She was Edward's sister.

As soon as I thought it, he appeared behind her. How I hadn't seen him before, towering over this girl, I had no idea. They both stood there, looking hauntingly beautiful with their pale skin and angular faces. She skipped over, with a dancer's step, looking more graceful than I could ever be

"Hello." I managed, my voice gravelly from not excercising it. "Who are you?"

"Oh!" She giggled, a tinkling sound. I almost smiled at the sheer brightness of it. "I'm Alice. Edward's sister. You guys have been talking more through Biology class and he's been worried about where you went. He said you've been having a bad couple of weeks. I've been meaning to introduce myself to you, I think we could be friends."

"Hi Alice." I said slowly, dumbly. I couldn't seem to match her fluid voice, her obvious excitability. Edward stepped into the room then, and Charlie excused himself, leaving, but not before he cast a nervous glance back, uneasiness about them being here and so close to me was written all over his face.

"Hello Bella, I'm glad to see you're, er, well?" His voice inflected upwards as he said it, like he wasn't sure if this was really well or not.

"Bella." Alice's high voice was soothing as she sat down at the end of my bed. "I'm excellent at making people feel better, if you want to spend time with us." I looked at her. Her eyes were the same shade of bright gold that Edward's were. They had the same haunted look and dark circles under her eyes. It must have been genetic.

"You want to make me feel better?" I asked, my voice husky. I then realized that I probably looked like a mess, and I had guests. I looked down, I was wearing an old, tattered grey sweater and plaid pajama pants. I probably stunk: I hadn't had a shower in a couple days and I was willing to bet that I looked more than worse for wear.

"We're both concerned for your health and well-being." Edward said, his voice washing over me like velvet. I felt a little better with their appearance, their soothing voices and need to make me feel better than I had been.

"You have to get out of here, you can't just hide out. Everyone's worried about you, and there are vicious rumours going around. Oh! That reminds me, I brought your schoolwork over from Angela." Alice bubbled, positively radiant.

"Thanks." I said, looking at her.

"Shall we get you out of bed?" She asked, standing up and smiling at me. She looked like she wanted to come closer, but was hesitant about something.

"Why are you guys here?" I asked, the thought passing through my head. It was odd that they, of all people would come to see me at my house. "How'd you find my house?" At this point, I would really have expected Mrs. Grady more than these two.

"We've told you." Alice laughed. "And everyone knows where everyone lives around Forks, silly. You should know that. We want to help you, and I want us to be friends." She tilted her head at me, placing a small hand on her delicate hip. It was inviting, she was so nice. I decided to get up out of my bed, like she had suggested. I slid out from under the covers, standing up and stretching. Suddenly, the realization slapped me in the face and I doubled over, falling to my knees on the floor.

"Bella!" Alice cried. Her hands were cool on my arms as she knelt next to me and felt my forehead. She placed me back on the bed. Nothing could ever replace Jake, they could only distract me from it for a small time, before I realized. A stray tear slipped from my closed eyes. Damn, I hadn't cried these whole two weeks, and of course this was going to let the floodgates open.

"Please, I don't think I want visitors today." I said, my voice threatening to break. I felt the tears burning just under the surface, behind my eyes.

"Are you sure?" Alice asked. I couldn't detect anything from her voice.

"Yes. I'm sure." I snapped, keeping my head down. I felt her hand on my arm again, and then she removed it. I looked up, but they were already gone, the room empty.

I ran to the bathroom, yanking the knobs in the tub to get the shower going. I stripped my clothes off, and made it as hot as I could handle, feeling my skin burn and finally letting the tears fall free. It doubled me over and eventually into a seated position, fighting the racking sobs that took over my body, and it was a long time before I could compose myself. I wasn't usually this emotional, but I was in pain. I finally got up and finished washing myself, scrubbing away three or four days worth of dirt and hopelessness. Edward and Alice had ignited something in me, even though they hadn't done anything, that felt like hope and made me want to try again.

It was an hour later that I descended the stairs, washed, clothed and smelling nice again. Charlie looked up, surprised as I walked into the kitchen. He stared at me apprehensively as I sat down at the table.

"Hi Dad." I said pleasantly, looking at him.

"Are you... okay?" He asked, slowly, uncertainly.

"Fine." I replied, giving him a smile. I then realized that it had been those two weeks since I had had any solid food at all. I grabbed a slice of cold pizza from the fridge and managed it down, feeling it drop into my empty stomach.

"I've never seen them around." Charlie said conversationally.

"Edward and Alice Cullen. I sit with Edward in Biology class." I replied, rolling my eyes. "I didn't even know Alice."

"They sure left fast. Polite kids though, Dr. Cullen's kids. That Alice is such a happy girl, she sat and talked to me for a while."

"Yeah, they're nice."

I poured and downed a glass of milk in one breath, rinsing the cup out and setting it in the sink.

"Um, Dad. I'm going to the reservation to see if I can see Jake yet." I said, swallowing loudly.

"You don't give up, I'll give you that Bells." Charlie replied, eyeing me warily. "I often wonder though, if it will be your downfall."

"Don't even worry about it. You know I'm strong." I replied. "I'm going to go now though. I'll check in when I get back."

I waved and was gone, getting in the truck and driving out to the reservation. I pulled into the driveway of the small red house that I had memorised and so often visited in the past. I jumped out of the truck and started walking the path up to the house, but stopped when I caught a glimpse of some tanned skin behind the house. I froze, trying to catch another glance, wildly hoping that it would be Jake. To my surprise, a whole group of boys came around front, who I knew to be Sam in front, Jake to his left and the rest following in some kind of a formation behind him, all only clad in cut-off shorts despite the cold day. It was Jake, my love. He was here in the flesh and I was finally seeing him. Everyone but Jake seemed to blur out, and it was when I took a closer look at his face, that I noticed it was hard and aged, his brows furrowed, a mask that was hiding the sunshine underneath. I let out a squeak and he looked up, his eyes widening impossibly, but they didn't seem to make it to mine.

"Bella." I saw him mouth, looking at the back of Sam's head, and before my brain could process it, I was running towards him. Jake reciprocated by walking towards me as well.

"Jake, JAKE!" Sam yelled ferociously, but Jake ignored him. He took two long steps and we met, our lips meeting in mid-stride, crashing together in pure desperation. All of the grief that I'd felt for the past fourteen days pouring out of me. His hands gently cupped my face as he pulled me closer. I wrapped my hands around his neck, our lips rejoicing like old friends, our kiss deepened as I pressed myself up against him, my heart beating against his, like they were in the race of their lives. Our tongues danced together, sharing the two week longing coming out in the heat of the kiss. Hanging onto him was all I could do not to crawl under his skin and live there, my mind blissful at the reunion, unable to coherently process thoughts because of how he made me feel once again

"Bella." He whispered, breaking off the kiss and leaning back the slightest amount, his eyes downcast and his voice low and husky. It was incredibly sexy. "I've missed you so much." His thumbs ran down the length of my jaw, more softly than I could ever remember.

"I haven't been able to get ahold of you." I whispered urgently, trying to look into his dark eyes, full of caring and love. He kept his eyes down, as though embarassed about what had happened and he reached behind his head, clasping my hand and bringing my palm to his lips, right in the centre.

He let go of my hand, his arms wrapping around me, pulling me to him. I wrapped my arms around his chest into a tight hug and he buried his head in my hair, inhaling deeply. I felt more stray tears escape my eyes as I pushed my forehead into his shoulder. His skin; it felt impossibly hot, like he had just came out of an oven. I breathed in the musky, woodsy scent that he always carried with him. That hadn't changed.

When he brought his face back to mine, I noticed his jaw was more sculpted, he had lost the final baby fat in his face and he looked like he'd aged so much in the couple of weeks I hadn't seen him. When I looked at his sad eyes, I noticed they were shining with unshed tears that probably mirrored mine right now. He wiped away the stray tears on my cheek with a finger, flicking them away.

"Baby, don't cry," He said softly.

"I'm just happy to see you." I whispered back, I hadn't really found my voice yet. He placed a soft kiss on my lips, but he broke away at the sound of a throat clearing. I followed his eyes over to the source. Embry and the two others looked uncomfortable each looking obviously away, but Sam stood with the same hard look that I had seen on Jake's face at first, arms crossed over his chest.

"Jacob, I think it's time to go." He said, his voice equally as hard.

Sam had always been distant. He was known as the guy dating Leah who made her happy. We didn't speak much, he was popular when he was in school, but usually just wandered around the town, lonely or with Leah. He had passed up a scholarship to stay, and at the moment, I glared at him with as much contempt as I could. He was _not_ taking my Jake away from me, Jake looked at Sam, then at the ground. He pressed his lips against mine once more, and wrapped his ring finger around mine before going back over to Sam. He immediately starting reprimanding him in a harsh whisper.

After a few minutes of his battery, Jake turned around, shoulders slumped. He took a half step forward as his face looked indesicive, then broken and then held defeat. I could hear my heart beating in my ears, rushing with the silence of the moment. It was many heartbeats before he composed his face into the hard mask once more, and spoke.

"Bella." He said, his voice suddenly emotionless. "Go."

"Wha-at?" I asked, my heart dropping. My mind focused on what had happened, I forgot how to breathe as I waited for his answer. I struggled to see something human in his face, something that would let me know that he was joking. My very being strained on the hope that he would close the distance again and take me into his arms.

"Go home. We're not together anymore" He said, his voice clear as it carried across the lot. His eyes were closed: he wouldn't even look at me as he sent me away.

I stared at him a few moments more, but his just mirrored Sam's, who was standing behind him, like a guard dog waiting for the word to attack. Jake wasn't human like this. He wasn't my Jake. Sam took my Jake away. I didn't listen to him, I stood there, waiting for Jake to change his mind, he had to change his mind. Sam put a hand on Jake's shoulder, and then turned around, walking to the back of the house again. I noticed that he was almost vibrating, he was probably angry that I wasn't leaving, but I couldn't bring myself to leave. He had to come over and take me into his arms again. He stood there for what felt like a long time, until Embry placed a hand on his shoulder, just like Sam had and he broke out of his reverie, still vibrating as they all ran off, leaving me standing there, alone.

"I love you." I whispered, even if he couldn't hear it, it made me feel good to say it, to know it was still true.

As the last of him disappeared into the trees, it suddenly started pouring, coming out of nowhere. Big fat drops had me soaked within seconds, like standing inside a cold shower. I could barely feel it as I turned slowly around and exhaled loudly, heading to my truck without looking back. I kept my eyes on the road as I backed up and didn't look back as I left the reservation, but the whole time my heart felt like it was shattering into a million pieces.

I ended up having to pull over because I started hyperventilating, and I couldn't see anymore through a waterfall of tears and a gallon of rain every couple of seconds. I didn't realize how close I was to home, but Charlie opened the door and drove the truck into the driveway, then picked me up and carried me to the house. I cried, racking sobs as he held me close to his chest, shifting me back up every couple of seconds like I was just too heavy for him.

"Daddy, why is this happening to me?" I cried, my voice breaking, not understanding the event that just happened. I really didn't. How could something that means so much to me be pushing me away like this? Charlie only frowned as he set me on the couch, drenched and depressed.

"I hate Sam." I managed after he had sat down next to me.

"What happened?" He asked tenderly, smoothing back my hair.

"It was good, and I saw Jake and then it was bad because Sam took him away from me." I whispered, looking up at him from heavy lids. "He wouldn't even look at me."

"Oh my god, I could kill that son of a-"

"No Dad no." I sniffed, placing a hand on his arm. "That won't help with anything. He's huge."

"I have a gun." He growled, and he seemed so serious, so protective, like he could do it.

"I'll deal with myself." I yawned. I closed my eyes, and made my breathing steady and slow after a few minutes, to make Charlie think that I was asleep. I couldn't make him feel better if I couldn't even make myself feel better. I felt him get up and tiptoe over to his chair, where he turned on the television set to a low volume. It wasn't long before I actually did fall asleep.

I awoke sometime later in my bed. It was dark and I had no recollection of how I ended up there. I sat up, blissful in the few seconds the in-between before realization bitch-slapped me, once again. I flopped over, letting my face fall into the blanket with a quiet whoosh. I couldn't get a grip on myself. This was just unbearable. I crawled out of my bed, one leg over the side at a time and pushed myself up. It was then that I made up my mind, I had to stop everything from hurting. It was tearing me up. I didn't want to hurt Charlie anymore, and I didn't want to be hurting, I just wanted Jake back.

**Tiny little sidenote: This is a tentative chapter, may be subject to change. *  
Thanks ****Jacob Lupo ****for your suggestions, I'm always open to them, and I just realized that its a great addition to the story.**


	17. Jacob's POV

**JPOV**

I heard the creaking before I saw it as I walked into the dark house. I looked around, but it was hard to see without the light and the new moon didn't give off any luminescence.

"Bella?" I called, clicking the lamp in the foyer on. An answering creak was all I got. "Bells?" I called out again, then looked up, where I almost passed out from the sheer initial shock of it.

Her long mahogany hair cascaded down her back like a waterfall, a note gripped tightly in her hand. Her face was turned away from me, and I immediately had the urge to hold her thin body. My Bella. But as my eyes raked the space above her, I noted more things. Her body was limp, her toes pointed downwards and she was hanging by a rope tied around her neck. I let out an involuntary cry, dropping to my knees. Anger and denial shot through me. She wasn't dead. Of course she couldn't be dead.

I let the tears flow from my eyes as I walked up the stairs and I tenderly took the note out of her still warm hands. Her porcelain skin still looked alive, her beautiful figure that I never got the chance to ravish enough turned with the rope, making me cringe. I unrolled the paper, just like an old scroll as I dropped to a sitting position on the stairs, my tears almost blurring my vision.

_I love you Jacob Black, _it started. I let out a cry from deep in my chest as I read it. This was her suicide note, and it was addressed to me. I was the cause of this, because Sam had forbidden me to see her. I looked over to her again, feeling the salty tears invade my mouth and tickle as they dropped off my chin. I carefully avoided looking at her face.

I love her so much, I don't think that I can live without her. She's the depth of my very being. The reason that I'm the way I am. I could never tell her that by the way she brushes her hand across my cheek, or lays her palm on my abdomen or arm gives me butterflies, makes me almost throw up in the sheer joy of it. She way she brushes her hair behind her ear, or blinks sometimes made my heart jump, skip a beat and kick its heels. The way her intelligent eyes looked at me like she saw right through me, but still loved me anyway, a beautiful chocolate brown made my knees go weak. When her lips brushed against mine, soft and supple, her body, curvy in all the right places pressed up against mine, I had to restrain myself from ripping our clothes off and worshipping her right there. All of these years, restraining from doing anything that would cross the boundaries we set, took incredible control, and I did want our first time to be perfect, just like she was, but I also wanted her. I was so in love, from when we were kids, I knew we'd grow up together and be together forever. It was impossible now, and there was no way I could join her wherever she was.

_The way you talked to me, when you told me to go home, I thought you weren't human anymore. I looked desperately for something in your face that would tell me that you still loved me. I hated the way I saw nothing, and the way you turned away like we'd never known each other. Jake, I can't live without you, and I don't plan on..._

I couldn't read anymore of the letter. It was a whole page written in her awkward script, but each word tore at my heart like a sword, ripping it into pieces so that I could only feel pain from now on. My Bella, my love. She was no longer with me, and I was going to live in pain for the rest of my life. I broke down, I don't know how I did it, but I pulled my long legs into my long upper body and curled up on the stairs, sobbing.

I woke up with a start, tears running down my face and my throat heavy with emotion. It made me realize how alone I was in here, without her. I rubbed my eyes and looked around my bright, tiny room, bare with only the essentials of a bedroom. I stared at the blankess of the white wall, trying to calm myself down. I caught a movement out of the corner of my eye, and found Embry leaning against the open window, a small smirk on his face as he regarded me.

"Well, well, well." He said, smiling.

"What are you doing?" I asked, on guard and sitting up. I quickly wiped the tears off on my sheet.

"You were crying like a little girl in your sleep. I had to watch you before I woke you up. What's up with the girlie act?" He was amused, I, however was not. I was also bigger and stronger than he was, even if I was so not in the mood to show Embry his place.

"Dream about Bella." I grumbled, ignoring his gibe and getting up. My head brushed the ceiling now, so I had to stretch outwards, which isn't as satisfying as reaching towards the sky. "What the hell do you want, anyway?" I asked with a growl.

"Sam sent me over to get the Beta for a meeting." Embry rolled his eyes. "Naturally, I had to wake you from a sleep."

"Funny." I slipped on a pair of jeans, they were a little small for me, but I managed.

"Let's go man." Embry sounded impatient. "He wanted you there asap."

"I don't think so. I want breakfast." I looked over at him, pulling back my lips to make my point clear.

"No, we can eat at Emily's. Please." Embry scowled, but it didn't match his pleading voice.

"Oh fine. Whatever." I gave in, leaving him and the room, closing my bedroom door behind me. I wasn't some animal, and I wasn't about to jump out the window.. I made my way out to the hallway and outside, where Billy was sitting in his wheelchair on the step, bundled up in a blanket.

"Good morning Dad." I said, trying to be cheerful as I jumped off the steps.

"Morning Jake, off to do some work?" He asked, wrapping the blanket around him tighter.

"Yeah, of course." I rolled my eyes, but stuck a finger up to tell him that I'd be right back. I ran into the house and grabbed a quilt, bringing it out and wrapping it around him. "Don't want you to get sick old man, it's a cold day."

"Thanks son, you didn't have to, but it is kind of chilly." He said, giving me a small smile. He had been understanding through all of this, even though he was a council member, and when it pained me to ask him, he had to send Bella away by being distant and cold to her. I knew it hurt him to say it to her, because he loved her, but he knew the importance of a Quileute secret.

"Are the brakes on?" I asked, checking his chair. I leaned down to make sure, I didn't want him rolling away.

"Yes, they are. Now get out of here." He laughed, his voice a gravelly sound and his chest hollow. He was getting sick.

I made sure he was warm enough before taking off towards the road in my backyard. If there was one good thing that I got out of this, it was the feeling that came with shifting. It made me feel so free, like everything that was actually happening right now could roll off of me, like I wasn't Jacob Black anymore. I couldn't control it yet, when or when not to shift, but I was getting really close. Faster than any of them, even Sam and especially Paul

I jumped off of the road and onto the trail that was thickly covered, no one from the road could see. Bella and I had been in here looking for Sam. Oh Bella. I was sure that I could do it, I could make myself angry enough to shift. I took my pants off and stood, feet shoulder-width apart and shook out my arms. Think angry, Jacob. Enraged. I've never been as mad as I was when Sam forbid me to see Bella.

_"Jake, do you understand what's happening to you?" Sam asked, hard and cold. He circled around me as we stood in the middle of the woods a couple miles from the Clearwater house. I nodded, furrowing my brow to make me seem older and knowing. It had turned out that the stories the council had been feeding us about our ancestors were true. I had transformed into something that I would never have once thought I'd be, not if I lived for a million years. "And you understand that you can no longer see Bella." He came around to face me and I started to nod again, but stopped._

_"What? No. I can't not see Bella." I protested immediately, my voice rising in tone._

_"You have to." He replied, calm as ever. "Jacob, I'm not going to use the Alpha tone, because I don't like forcing people to do things, but I forbid it."_

_"This can't... This won't." I stuttered. I looked at him wildly. "I have to see Bella." _

_"Jacob. Do you want to lose control and end up hurting her? Do you want to look at that and feel the guilt of what you did-?"_

_"NO! But I'm not going to stop seeing Bella!" I roared at him. He didn't even flinch. I was fired up. There was no way he could stop me from seeing her, my love, my Bella. He couldn't, I couldn't live without her. I wouldn't. Anger flowed through my veins, coursing through every part of me. No one was going to stop me._

_"I don't want you to go through that! Wait until you can control it, even if it takes months."_

_"IT WON"T HAPPEN TO ME!" I yelled into his face, only mere inches from it. _

_"THATS WHAT I SAID TOO." He yelled back, and I stopped, like he'd slapped me in the face. He only stared at me, his eues wide like he hadn't meant to let it out._

It had worked, I started vibrating, feeling my skin stretch to accomodate around my new four legged form. I couldn't get the way her face looked when I had to walk away from her out of my mind, even in this form. Her heartbroken face, falling as I turned away. I don't think she knew I heard, but her whispered "I love you" tore into me, making me want to turn around and go back to her and stay with her for the rest of my life. Maybe if I stopped shifting, this could all end.

I suddenly noticed all of the voices inside my head, rushing at me in a swift motion.

Jacob there you are, Sam's voice growled at me_. Are you going to get here or not?_

_Jesus Jake, enough with the Bella whining. _Jared put in

_Maybe you should just let him go see Bella. _Embry said, and then everyone got a glimpse of me crying today.

_Ha! You're such a Sally. _Paul laughed_. What would even bring that on? _The question brought me back to the dream, reliving the painfulness of it.

_Oh, sorry dude. _Jared was immediately regretful. Of course.

_Enough. _Sam's powerful voice cut through everything. _Get your ass over here Jake._

_On my way._ I replied, and started running to their location, behind Sam's cabin in the woods, back in the clearing he had made especially for these reasons_. _I entered the ring of four wolves sitting around, dropping down beside Sam in my Beta position. I was destined to be Alpha, but I wanted no part of it, I couldn't handle what Sam did, and I was a newly turned wolf. He'd been doing this for a long time.

_Jake,_ Sam said lowly. _Now's not the time for reveling in your emotions. Stop with the self-pity._

_Yeah man, you know, I have dreams of how much I miss Bella, and I've barely talked to the girl. _Jared thought. I let out a low growl at him, and he looked away.

_And by the way, it will be a long time before you can stop shifting. Even at the rate you're going. _Sam added in. I growled at him to, a low rumble in my throat._ Enough. I don't have any updates. There are definitely leeches here in the town. Old Quil has mentioned that they're the same ones that Ephraim Black made the treaty with, and as long as they don't cross our lines or hunt our people, we'll be okay, and we don't have to attack them._

_I wish we could. _Paul shifted from foot to foot, his tail wagging.

_There's no need to. _Sam replied, calm. Always calm. _And Quil is going to be transforming soon, I'm quite positive. Don't talk to him yet, but know that it's going to happen. Other than that, I have no news. Jake and Embry, I want you to run the perimeter of the reservation. Just once all the way around. Then you can come to our place and eat._

_Will do, captain. _Embry saluted with a paw and took off. I stared at Sam for a moment before leaping off the other way. Sam was always calm, and he'd imprinted on Emily. The constant serenity might tie into it, I guess that only people who have imprinted know what it's all about, but I wonder why I hadn't imprinted on Bella when I'd seen her.

_Because maybe you guys aren't meant to be. _Embry snickered as he ran.

_Shut the hell up, or you'll be hurting. _I said back.

_You can't even do much more damage to me than I can to you_. He replied, getting cocky, a lot different than he used to be. _And what's with the angriness lately? Seriously, he hasn't like, killed you or anything. _

_He might as well have, for all it's done_. I replied quietly.

_Do you really need to see her that badly? You can't live without her for a couple of months? _Embry asked

_Do you really not understand, Embry? You've had full access to how I feel and you still think I can go for a couple of days_? I said, and I could feel myself getting testy.

I finished running the perimeter and veered off towards my house. She always made the best food, even better than Sue's and I always looked forward to it, to my new family is what I'd consider them. We were that close. I shifted and ran to where I left my jeans, slipping them on and jogging over to Emily and Sam's. I noticed people looking at me, it was a little chilly out for them today.

Tonight, something was going to happen and I was going to see her. Because I had to. Because I couldn't go without seeing her. I hated to defy Sam, but I wasn't going to lose control .If anything I'd be completely in control. I walked up the driveway and into the house, prepared to pretend that I wasn't going against his wishes tonight, and to act lively. It usually wasn't hard with all of the commotion that went on.


	18. Busy

I was heading to the bathroom when I heard the small 'tics' on the window, like small pebbles hitting it repeatedly. I froze in midstep and turned my ear towards the sound. It was like someone was trying to get my attention from outside. I walked over, noting that the window was open a couple of centimetres even though I was sure that I'd closed it earlier this week. I heaved it open all the way and leaned out, eyes roving the dark yard.

"Stand back." A bodiless voice called up, but I'd know that voice anywhere. "I'm coming up."

I slipped back out of the range of the window and then Jacob was there, filling up the small room, and engulfing me in a tight hug.

"Jacob, I wasn't expecting to see you again." I whispered numbly, feeling everywhere his hot body came in contact with mine.

"I can't stay away from you." His voice broke as he kept his face away from my line of vision. "Even if this is the last time I can see you."

"Says who? Why would this be a last time?" I asked, immediately on the defensive.

"Sam will forbid me." He replied. I still couldn't see his face.

"You don't have to listen to him!" I cried out, then pursed my lips. I most definitely didn't want to wake Charlie up.

"It's complicated." He said, his voice muffled through my shoulder. "You smell delicious."

The last comment completely threw me from the conversation, making me stop. As he took a step back, I finally got to take a good look at him. Unlike earlier today, when I was completely focused on the reunion and then the pain of his words, I got the chance to really look, all over. I noticed he filled up my room more so than before, ducking his head to the low ceiling, a lot taller than I. A lot taller than he previously was. His hair was shorn, cut short like the rest of them, a little longer, but the longness of it was gone. I stepped towards him with a hand stretched out to run my hand down his now defined shoulder muscles, bicep, tricep. I ran my hand over his pecs and down his abdomen, which twitched at my touch. He caught my hand at his last set of abs, he was so muscley now, so tall. He looked older too, in a deliciously good way.

The moment didn't need words, his expression was soft as he lifted my hand to his face, resting it on his defined jaw. I looked up into his eyes that were focused anywhere but my eyes, but so full of love, I almost cried. Looking at his half-naked body, and knowing that I may not see him again, much to my protests, I was definitely going to take advantage of the situation. My heart racing, as per usual around Jake, and my hand shaking, I freed it from his hand and put a finger under his jaw, pulling his lips to mine. He responded quickly, and it felt like they were burning upon contact. I immediately deepened it; I wasn't going to waste any time: swiping my tongue across his lip.

He responded, as he always would and I slowly led him towards my bed, where I laid down, him crawling on top of me. I grinned into his mouth, I was going to make sure he wouldn't stop tonight, I was going to push him to his extreme limits. He might let me, I didn't know, but I was sure as hell going to try. I caught his bottom lip with my teeth, grating them across it. He groaned into my mouth as his hand slid around my back, lifting my shirt halfway up my stomach. In response, I wrapped my legs around him, pulling him down so that we were flush up against each other. I could feel his heart racing under his soft, burning skin, and his breathing was labored as I nibbled on his ear and ran my nails down his back. He bucked against me, right into my core and he started placing feathery light kisses down my jaw, right down over my collarbone and back up. I felt myself heat up with excitement. I didn't know what I was doing, but I think I was doing something right. His hand pushed further up my shirt coming around to my front, contemplating at the underside of my bra. I reached down and ran my hand over the hard ridge in his pants.

"Bella," He started in a warning tone, but I covered his mouth with mine. He took the hand that was exploring and pinned it down above my head. I used my other hand to maneuver the button of his jeans, undoing it in one flick of my hand, surprisingly. My breath hitched in my throat as the excitement of this increased and I started unzippering his pants. It was then that he pulled away, abruptly, sitting up and doing up his pants, looking across the room, his eyes black with emotion. I then knew I had almost taken it too far, but I was relentless. I sat up across from him and placed a hand on his chest, right where his heart was. It beat so hard that it jumped against his rib cage, pushing out my hand with every beat. His eyes watched me, wary, calculating and unmoving as he tried to get his breathing in check.

"Jake, what if you're not allowed to see me again?" I asked in a small voice, looking up at him, at his beautifully set features, his hair messy. He didn't answer right away, only breathed for a few minutes, nostrils flaring. I moved backwards, sitting back on my heels and closed my eyes. With both hands, I grabbed the bottom of my shirt and lifted it, aiming to take it off.

Just as I was about to be free of it, large hands grabbed the material and pulled it back down. I whined in protest, but they were unyielding, making sure that my shirt was in place.

"Jake, we might as well. If you aren't allowed to see me ever again!" I said once more. I could see the battle in his eyes as he stared down at the blanket, obviously trying to fight to do the right thing. I didn't want him to do the right thing. For once, Jake just shouldn't be perfect and do the wrong thing.

"I'm not allowed to see you." He said finally, sadly, as he pulled me closer to him. He still wouldn't meet my eyes, just like the other day. He took my hands in his recently enormous ones. The contrast between dark and light was gorgeous, like it had always been. Like it will always be. "You need to understand though, regardless of whether or not I can see you, I will always love you. Only you." His last words were hard and his face was so close to mine our noses almost touched, like he wanted, needed me to understand.

"I can't live without you." I whispered.

"You won't. No matter what. I cannot leave you." He said. I wrapped my arms around him, laying my head on his chest as he gathered me into his lap. "I mean, seeing you can't be all that difficult to do, can it?" He swallowed hard.

"No one should be able to stop you." I whispered into his skin.

"It's going to be hard. I don't know if I will be able to do it." His voice was jagged, and the words cut through me.

"Are you... Are you ...?" I stuttered, leaning away from him. He didn't reply, and when I looked up at him, his eyes were on the ceiling, like he was trying not to cry.

"No." He said, after a long silence. "I couldn't. I wouldn't. But I'm scared of what it would do to you."

"What what would do to me?" I asked incredulously, gaping up at him. He nestled me back into his chest.

"I'll be busy, my visits won't be regular, and Billy won't want you coming over." He said softly.

"We can find time. The busy-ness will pass, won't it?"

"Yes, I'm trying to stop. Stop being busy." He pressed his lips against my forehead. "As long as we both stay calm, and you don't try what you just tried right there again." He pressed his forehead to mine, eyes closed and face contorted with concentration.

"Ever?"

"Not ever, just for a while." He said.

"I figured if it was the last time I saw you..." I started.

"It's not. But we can't do that now. Not yet." He shook his head, keeping his eyes closed. "You know how I feel about it. And you know how I feel about you."

"Why don't we just...?" I started, but he cut me off again.

"No." He said firmly. "We're not doing it to make up for something. I know that's why you want to, and I'm just not going to give in that way."

"Okay." I said softly, and the room fell quiet as I listened to his breathing, the quick pace of his heart, felt his firey skin against my body. This couldn't be it, could it? Could I live with the agony of not being with Jacob? No. I most definitely could not. I'd rather die.

"I don't want you to be hurt if I don't visit you for a while." Jake said after a long time. "I'm sorry that all of this happened." He slid me off his lap and stood up.

"Of course I'll be hurt. I can't not see you." I said, staring down at my hands.

"I wish things had happened differently." He said softly. "But know that the reason I came over was not to make out with you. Well, not only that. I just want to warn you of what's coming. Sam.."

"Sam is not the boss of you!" I interrupted him, louder than I intended.

"Sam's been helping me out a lot." Jake said, almost fond of the name. "He's a really great guy."

I sighed.

"If this is the way it's going to be, then why don't you just leave." I turned away from him, fighting the tears that were threatening at the corners of my eyes. I waited a few minutes in silence to see if he really would go. It was long and painstaking, and I turned around slowly to see if he was gone, prepared for the worst.

"You're still here." I said dully, finding his face mere inches from mine.

"I love you too much to let you go." He said, his voice husky, his eyes watery.


	19. Rival

I slipped into my truck at the end of Monday and let out a sigh of relief, sagging down into the seat. Charlie had put his foot down and made me come back to school, saying that if I missed any more of it, I'd be failing. I knew better than to argue with him about school, it was the one thing he wasn't so lenient on.

"You've been having a hard time lately." A soft voice said to my right, I jumped around, fists raised and ready to fight off the attacker. I found Edward Cullen sitting in the passenger seat, staring down at the hands folded neatly in his lap.

"How-How...?" I stuttered, stunned at his sudden appearance.

"I opened the door and sat down. I guess you didn't hear me." He replied, his musical voice carrying over to me. He looked up, his golden eyes crinkling the slightest as he took in my face. "Alice's and my offer still stands. If you need a friend, we're here. She'd really like to be friends with you."

"I don't want to be mean, but..." I started, but he cut me off.

"Is there something that you have against us? I'd completely understand, but I would appreciate if you would just say it to me directly."

I stared at him in surprise at the carefully worded and direct statement.

"No, it's not that I have anything against you. I'm just going through a lot right now and I'm not sure if I can handle taking on another challenge right now." I said, staring straight at him.

"We could help you through it. I'm sure I know what you're going through right now." He said.

"No, I'm pretty sure you don't." I retorted, immediately on the defensive.

"Then I'm sure that I could help." He sounded earnest as he looked at me. I hesitated, staring over at him. He looked almost fragile, with a determined set to his mouth.

"Bella!" Alice's high voice came at my other side as my door opened in a whoosh. "We could go out for something to eat, we could go shopping, we could do something, anything to get your mind off of it." She said grandly, excitedly.

"This is a lot to take in." I said nervously. Alice had me out of the car and was ushering me over to a silver volvo in the parking lot.

"It's going to be okay. We're not going to hurt you, or anything. We're just here to take your mind off of it. What else are friends for?" Alice said soothingly.

"Does the Grill sound like a good idea to you? Would that be alright, or shall we go somewhere in Port Angeles?" Edward asked, opening the door for me.

"I didn't bring any money with me today." I protested.

"Thats quite alright. My treat." Edward smiled serenely down at me. He then was at the drivers side of the car, getting in. "You still haven't answered though. Would you like to go to Port Angeles? It wouldn't take all too much of your time."

"The Grill's fine. It's cheap and easy." I replied, slipping on my seatbelt. I figured while I was here, I might as well make a good time of it because this time him and Alice weren't going to let me go.

"I'm feeling Port Angeles. We can go shopping before we eat." Alice said, squeezing into the spot between the seats.

"Ugh, no way." I said, through my head back. "I hate shopping."

Alice gasped, throwing a hand to her mouth.

"No! You cannot hate shopping! Bella, I promise it will take your mind off it." She said quickly. I turned to her and Edward.

"Take my mind of what, exactly?" I asked, looking at them both. Edward was silent and kept driving, but Alice's golden eyes turned and stared straight into mine.

"Your obvious problem with your boyfriend at the moment. You're having trouble." She said.

"How do you know about it?" I was a little creeped out at how much she knew.

"Well, he was hard to miss the first couple of days. Tall with dark skin. Stood right out. Your obvious pleasure at his presence. Your constant happy mood that suddenly turned sour. Since you're still talking to all your friends, it must be him, right?" Alice explained, and suddenly it wasn't so creepy anymore. I saw Edward smile out of the corner of my eye.

"That's interesting that you picked up on all that." I stated, then turned back to my forward position.

"What's his name?" She asked after a few minutes.

"Jake." I replied.

"Cute."

"Yeah." Her 'yeah' turned into a gurgle and I whipped around to see what was wrong. She sat motionless, her eyes staring forward and curiously blank.

"Alice? Alice?" I asked, putting my hand on her knee. She shook out of it and looked at me, smiling.

"Sorry, I just remembered that I forgot to do some chores at home and my parents will be back before I get home." She smiled serenely at me. Edward turned around in his seat and looked at her, their eyes meeting for a brief second before he turned back to me and smiled as well.

"So the Grill it is." Edward said, right before Alice started in on a steady chatter, only needing a few words to be encouraged. It only felt like moments before we pulled into the old place and got out.

"This is way better than if we went somewhere fancy." I said, breathing in the smell of fried food.

"I've never been here before." Edward said from behind me. He reached around me and pulled open the door, allowing Alice and I to head inside before walking in himself.

"Are you serious? But this place is so popular with the locals." I said, looking around. I went and sat in a booth in the corner by the window, Alice and Edward following suit, Alice sliding in beside me and Edward across from us.

"We moved here a couple years ago..." Edward started.

"Our dad keeps us on a strict diet, so we don't eat out very often." Alice finished for him.

"Oh," I replied, playing with a salt shaker. "That doesn't sound very fun at all."

"It has it's ups, I guess." Alice replied, her voice sounding slightly dark.

"Hi guys, what can I get you today?" The waitress cut in, smiling down at us. She pulled a pen and paper from her shirt pocket and Edward looked at me.

"I guess I'll have some fries and gravy with chocolate milk." I said. "It's a little too early for a big meal."

"I already ate, I guess I'll have some water." Alice said, then looked at Edward. "Weren't you mentioning how hungry you were earlier?" She asked, grinning. Edward shot her a dirty look, which confused me.

"You can get something. I won't tell on you for eating something fatty once." I told him, he looked at me, almost as if he had forgotten that I was there.

"Oh yeah, I'll have a basket of wings." He replied.

"Anything to drink, hun?" The waitress asked, looking at him.

"Oh, um... A coke." He said, shifting in his seat.

"Alright, I'll be back in a few seconds with your drinks." With a snap of her gum, she took off across the room, swinging back with our drinks. She bade a quick "Be right back with your food" and was off again, running around the small restuarant. I watched her for a while as we sat in cold silence at our table, until I felt a couple cold spots on the back of my hand. I whipped my head around and found Alice looking at me, one corner of her mouth turned up into a half smile. She looked hopeful.

"I hope you don't find that we're pushing you too hard." She said, her voice gentle.

"No, not at all." I replied, sipping on my chocolate milk.

"Because we can back off, but this has been one of our only chances to get to know you. Everyone seems to just flock around you." She giggled, a beautiful tinkling sound. "It's not often that we get new people that Edward actually wants to talk to." Alice jerked her head toward him. I looked over, he was staring straight at me. I looked away uncomfortably.

"Okay." I replied dumbly. Alice giggled again.

"It's not often that grumpy let's us get out of our small circle of siblings." Alice said happily.

All of a sudden the two were locked in a staredown; Edward's face menacing, Alice's concentrated. They continued like that until I cleared my throat. Their heads whipped over to me, and for a second it looked like they were going to eat me. I felt myself shrink away from them, but in the next instant their faces were smiling and relaxed.

"Um, did I interrupt a conversation?" I asked slowly.

"No! Not at all. A little sibling rivalry, see the thing is..."

"There is no thing. We just fight sometimes." Edward broke in, leaving Alice's sentence unfinished. I accepted that and took another long drink of my milk.

"Here you guys go. Enjoy!" The waitress said happily, smiling at us before dashing off once more. I dug right in, forgetting until that moment that I had only had apple juice for lunch, and I was starved.

After taking a few bites, I looked up and noticed that Edward hadn't touched his wings yet.

"You know, you can eat it." I said after swallowing. He looked down and I saw his nose curl slightly.

"Come on Edward. I won't tell Carlisle." Alice sang out, hitting him lightly on the arm.

"Seriously. You need to let go once in a while." I put in. "If you don't mind my asking, is eating like you do how you keep yourselves in shape?" Alice looked at me and laughed

"Something like that." She said, her golden eyes sparkling. "We run a lot, go hiking and camping when we can."

"Oh? How often do you go camping?" I asked, leaning forward.

"Usually when it's sunny." It was Edward who answered this time, quiet and reserved as he had been as long as I knew him. I met his eyes as he finished talking, and noted how dark they were. In Biology, the light gold of them had captivated me, drawn me in.

"Did you get contacts?" I blurted out before I could stop myself. He immediately looked away.

"Er, no. It must be the lighting in here, they also change with my mood." He said quickly, looking off across the room.

"No direct questions." Alice whispered at me. "They make him uncomfortable."

I couldn't help but giggle at how right she really was. He shifted in his seat towards the window and looked out. I took some more bites of my fries, and noticed his wings were still untouched.

"Are you going to eat, or what?" I asked, gesturing towards them.

"Oh." Edward looked surprisedly down at his wings." He delicately picked on up and took a small bite out of it, chewed it up for a long time, and swallowed with what looked to be great difficulty. "I don't usually eat meat, so I'm not even sure why I ordered this." He made a small face, and his eyes flicked up to mine. He held them there for a long time, and I stared right back, looking at his eyebrows furrowing together in concentration.

"Hey! What's going on here?" A jolly voice broke the spell, and Edward and I looked away at the same time. Charlie stood over us, smiling.

"Hey Dad." I greeted, and then saw Jake hovering behind him. I noticed this with surprise and I jumped out of the booth, throwing myself against him.

"Jacob!" I said with delight. He hugged me back with just at much enthusiasm, but tried to put me behind him as he casually asked:

"Who are your friends?" He looked between the two of them, and it seemed that Edward and Alice were leaning backwards with almost a look of disgust on their faces.

"These are my friends Edward and Alice." I said, gesturing.

"Edward and Alice." He murmured thoughtfully, his eyes passing between the two of them. His arm was poised in front of me, as if he was guarding me. "You must be the Cullens, then?"

"Do you know them, Jake?" I asked, looking up at him. His eyes were unusually hard, his face set to the same stone-like way it was when he was with Sam.

"Yes. I believe we do know each other." He said lowly.

"Pleasant to see you." Edward replied with a curt nod of his head. Alice looked like she was in pain.

"Do you want to sit with us?" I asked, moving to sit down.

"No." He answered. I stopped, and looked at him. Jake never passed up the chance for anything.

"What do you mean, no?" I asked, narrowing my eyes at him. Edward cleared his throat from behind me.

"No, Alice and I have to be home really soon. It's supposed to get sunny tomorrow and we have to start packing to go camping." He shifted in his seat, then got up, Alice behind him. Jake snorted.

"This was really nice Bella. We have to do it again sometime." Alice said, gathering me into a sweet-smelling hug.

"Yes, we should do it again." I smiled at her. She waved and they left out the door.

"Wow. That was awkward." Charlie cleared his throat and adjusted his pants uncomfortably.

"What are you guys doing together?" I asked, still standing away from Jake, who looked to be wallowing.

"Jake came over asking for you, I told him you weren't home, then offered to buy him dinner." Charlie laughed. "and of course he wouldn't pass that up." I smiled at the thought.

"It's true." I replied.

"Well, I see Harry over there, I have to go say hello." Charlie excused himself, heading over to Harry's table, leaving Jake and I standing there. I sat down again and pushed aside my fries and empty glass. I noticed Edward's wings and Coke and Alice's water sat untouched for the most part. It was a shame that Jake interrupted before he could eat. Jake folded himself into the bench beside me, pushing the wings aside as well. He lay his long arms across the tabletop.

"So, what was that?" I asked, staring at him.

"We don't exactly get along." He replied, coldly.

"They're my friends. You could at least be nicer to them." I said, matching his tone.

"When I say we don't exactly get along, I mean that we're enemies." He said ominously. This completely threw me. I sat with my mouth gaping before regaining composure. If anyone knew Jake as well as I did, they would know that he had no enemies. People couldn't help but be friends with him.

"You-You're..." I stuttered, not able to wrap my head around it. I sat there, looking at him dumbly, but he paid me no mind, just looked out the window, his eyes filled with questions that I had a feeling I couldn't answer.

**NEW CHAPTER IS GOING TO BE PUT UP :  
Sunday, December 19th, 2010.**

**I promise.**


	20. Compulsive

I smelled it before I saw him. I slammed my locker door shut and turned to him, frowning. What I saw caught me off guard.

Edward stood, looking at me with a small smile playing on his lips. I couldn't help but notice his grey v-neck fit tightly against his wiry frame and his jeans showed the muscles in his legs. His stark, golden eyes seemed to drink me in as he stared at me tenderly. In his hand was a bouquet of the whitest flowers I had ever seen, they made him look almost tan in comparison. The flowers were beautiful, a whorl of petals standing out against the dull school background.

"I got these for you." He said, a musical sound. He held them up for me to take.

"For me? But why?" I asked, taking them in my hands and inhaling. The smell was as beautiful as the flowers themselves.

"Because flowers as beautiful as these are should be given to someone who would make them look terrible in comparison." There was an amused look in his eye as he took in my expression. I felt my jaw drop, and couldn't shut it fast enough.

"Wow...wow. Thank you." I stuttered. I couldn't figure out what to say to him. Truth be told, I was beginning to think that he wasn't that bad of a guy, and he was treating me pretty well, but I wasn't about to let him know that simple little flowers could win me over.

"They are called Gardenia jasminoides. They only grow in subtropic areas like South Africa, Hawaii or Australasia. They are pretty rare around this place. It's not very warm here." Edward smiled, showing a small amount of teeth.

Okay, wow. These weren't simple little flowers. He probably ordered them in and paid a fortune for them. I felt bad for accepting them.

"I don't think I can accept these." I said, holding them out to him.

"Yes you can." He said, shaking his head. He put up a hand to stop me, pushing them back toward me. I obliged, pulling them back into my chest, the fragrance floating up and invading my nose once more.

"They were probably expens-" I started.

"My mom gets them for a really good discount." He interrupted, silencing me. He stood with his hands in his pockets, looking like the epitome of cool.

"Well, thank you." I said, after a few minutes.

Only then did I realize that I had completely shut out the rest of the people milling by to get to class. The sound of people rushed into my ears, shocking me. I blinked, realizing how closed in my vision had been on him.

"Well, you'd better get to gym." He said, gesturing out the door.

"Yeah, I'll go put these in my truck." I said, turning away.

"I could go do that for you." He said, suddenly in front of me.

"Oh! Well, alright." I said, handing them over to him. "Thank you."

"No problem." He gave me a crooked smile that almost melted my frosty persona.

With that, he was gone and I headed over attend my gym class. I changed and started the laps that Coach Clapp assigned. As I was expecting, Jessica caught up with me.

"Oh. My. God." She gushed. "Edward was just talking to you. Like, a real conversation. Like, what did you do to him to make this friendship? Are you blackmailing him?"

I laughed. "No, I'm not sure why."

"HE GAVE YOU FLOWERS!" She shrieked, then looked to see if anyone heard her. When she made sure no one was listening, she stepped a little closer. "I was making faces at you, but you didn't see me. You were mystified by him."

"You're right, I didn't see you. I don't know why he was dazzling me so much." I shook my head.

"This is crazy. I'm going to go tell Mike." She ran on up ahead before I got to say another word, leaving me with my thoughts.

"Bella!" Jessica yelled. She tried to wave me over. I ran up to the two of them.

"Whhhuuuuuuttt?" Mike said to me. I shrugged back.

The rest of the class went by like that, me thinking about what had just happened and Jessica and Mike freaking out over it. I was relieved when the bell rang to finish the day off. I changed, grabbed my book bag and walked out to my truck. Edward was there, leaning against the side.

"I was just making sure your pretty flowers didn't get stolen." He smiled, then turned toward his car. "See you tomorrow."

"That's it?" I whispered after him, thinking he was too far away to hear me, but he turned around. Damn.

"What more were you expecting, Bella?" He called out softly, my name on his tongue sounded like candy. I couldn't respond, only stood there dumbly. Then, suddenly he was standing in front of me, only inches from touching. He took a long, cold finger and placed it under my chin, lifting my head up so my eyes met his. I obliged. "Were you expecting me to chase after you?"

"I-..." I breathed, not able to finish the sentence. The smell of his breath was intoxicating, like it had been before in that Biology class. I breathed in hungrily.

"Were you expecting a hug, maybe a soft kiss?" He murmured, then chuckled softly. "I can see that you are appreciative of the flowers. That makes me happy."

"Mmmmmmhmm." Was all I could say. My brain was foggy with the smell and feel of him near me.

"I don't know. I thought that the flowers would be enough for today, but you seem to be wanting more." His voice had lowered to whisper. "Would you like for me to kiss you, Bella?"

His golden eyes caught mine as he said it, and my brain responded with an enthusiastic and eager 'yes', but somewhere in the back of my brain, something was screaming Jake's name as hard as it could. But Jake wasn't here, was he? My eyes couldn't part from his, they were beautiful and captivating. My head nodded, yes.

He leaned in; slowly; surely. His cold lips brushed against my cheek, ever so softly.

"Have a good evening, Bella." He said, smiling. There was something almost knowing and menacing in that smile. I hadn't figured it out before he walked away, getting into his car and leaving.

As soon as I couldn't see him anymore, my brain cleared, giving me the biggest head rush I've ever felt. I staggered backwards against the truck, holding onto it for support with one hand and trying to keep my head together with the other. What had just happened there? Why had I let Edward kiss me like that, or get so close to me like that? Why had I willingly submitted to it? Confused, I got in my truck and headed home, trying to shake the whole episode off. I put the flowers on the table, but avoided looking at them while they were there.

The rest of the week went by as slow as molasses. I didn't see Edward, and I was too ashamed to contact Jake or show up at his house, but it wasn't like he had made any attempt to see me either. My days consisted of going to school, coming home and watching nonsense tv shows until I went to do my homework and went to bed.

On Friday afternoon as I was watching "Three's Company" on television, Charlie finally turned it off, standing in front of it with his hands on his hips, looking down at me.

"You know, as your father, I'm worried about what's going on between you and Jake at the moment." He said gruffly. I looked up at him blankly.

"I'm just sitting in watching tv." I replied solemnly.

"Well, its freaking me out. You've never had time to watch television before in your life."

"Jacob's been busy lately." I avoided his stare and tried to turn the television back on with the remote, but he moved in front of the eye.

"You still have friends. Go down to the reservation, hang out with Bina. I bet she misses you." He said.

"I guess she might." I replied, thinking about it. "Maybe I've been a little selfish lately. I'll go see her." Maybe going down to the reservation and hanging out with my best friend could be a good thing.

"That's better. Get out of here. Maybe you'll stay the night over there too, it is Friday." He smiled hopefully at me.

I grunted my assent and got up, grabbing my keys from Charlie's hand; he had already planned to make me get up and go. The drive there was nothing; as I've driven it countless times since I've moved here. I parked the truck in the same hidden parking lot that I had done before and started walking down the road.

In the first ten minutes of walking, I saw nobody. I even went down to the beach, walking along it, but there was nobody to be found. I decided to go to the Clearwater's to look there, but as I walked up the driveway, I knew it was going to be useless to look here. The place looked empty.

"Hello?" I called, opening the door. I walked into the front entrance and listened for a while. "Hellooo." I called out again.

"Hi." a voice said from behind me. I jumped forward. Seth stood there, laughing like a hyena for a couple minutes at my expense.

"Seth!" I hissed. "There are other ways to greet people than scaring them."

"It was too priceless to pass up." He answered after catching his breath. "I was out back, pulling some weeds for mom in her garden when I heard you calling."

"Why's it so deserted down here today?" I asked.

"Council meeting, I suppose. It doesn't sound interesting at all, but everyone's excited about it. You should see the crowd outside who weren't allowed in."

"A council meeting? About what?" I asked, confused. "And who wasn't allowed in?"

"Nobody was allowed in except for the couple old council members that there are. Old Quil, Billy Black, those people. People are waiting outside, hopeful that some information will be leaked. There hasn't been a council meeting in a long, long time." Seth answered, puffing out his chest like he was proud of the information he could share.

"So, if I wanted to find anybody who lives on the reservation, except for you of course, I'd have to go down to the Town Hall?" I asked, figuring it out in my head. Seth looked at me, amused, a half smile on his young face.

"Exactly. Except for me. That kind of stuff doesn't interest me." He made a disgusted face and looked down at his dirty fingers.

"It shouldn't interest the young people either, should it?" I asked.

"Noooootttt really." Seth sighed. "But Sam's inside the meeting as well, and Leah was hoping to talk to him or something. She drug Bina down with her."

"Ahh, thats funny. I came down here looking for Bina." I chuckled.

"You weren't actually looking for me when you walked into my house?" Seth pouted, but couldn't hide the grin behind it to make it legitimate.

"Not this time little buddy." I replied, softly hitting him on the shoulder. "You want to come down with me?"

"You really want me to head down there?" He asked incredulously.

"Sure, why not?" I asked, heading out the door. He followed me, catching up in half as many strides.

"I'll go for the walk, I guess." He said as we headed down the driveway.

"Thanks for the company." I smiled over at him.

"I'll just warn you right now." He started, sounding thoughtful.

"About what?"

"Leah's gotten... well, she's not really herself anymore. She's kind of angry about everything."

"Hasn't she got over it yet?"

"Er, no. She's kind of mean right now. Well, very mean."

"That's sad."

"Yeah, I thought I'd catch you up on the happenings, since it seems you haven't been down here very much at all lately."

"That's true." I replied solemnly.

Only seconds later the Town Hall came into view, and I was shocked by the truth of Seth's statement about the residents wanting to know what was going on. There was a large crowd milling around outside, quite a few recognizable, all wearing the same look of confusion and desperation.

"Now do you see what I mean?" Seth asked, then sighed. "I'm going to head back to the house, sorry. But I'm not interested in spending time with all these desperate people." He rolled his eyes and waved before heading back the way we came. I pushed my way through people, looking around for the familiar faces of Bina and Leah.

"Bella!" I heard a voice call, and looked around for the source. "Bellaaaaaaaa!" The unmistakable call of Bina yelled out again, and I finally saw Leah and Bina standing together to my right. I wove through the crowd to get to them, having to squeeze between bodies and around people who wouldn't budge.

"Hey you guys. I've been looking for you for a couple hours at least. I had a nice walk around the reservation." I said sardonically. Leah looked at me blankly.

"How couldn't you know this is going on." Leah said tonelessly.

"No worries about her." Bina said, waving off Leah's statement. "I'm so glad you're down here!"

"Yeah, I came to visit you, actually." I grinned at her.

"Really? That's exciting. We can have a time tonight." She said excitedly. I saw Leah roll her eyes out of the corner of mine.

"Problem, Leah?" I asked defensively.

"Try to be around more and maybe you'd know what it is." Leah spat, narrowing her eyes at me.

"That's if you knew my situation." I said back.

"Oh, because what you're going through is soooo much more traumatic." Leah rolled her eyes.

"Okay!" Bina cut in, looking at me in wonder. "I'm not usually the one who diffuses fights." She let out a small giggle.

"I'm going home." Leah stated, turning and stalking off angrily.

"Not herself lately." Bina exhaled. "Oh well, a new situation has arisen."

"Yes. I'm here and yours darlin'." I smiled at her, opening my arms.

"It's good that you're back." She gave me a quick hug, then stepped back and looked around. "I was actually going to going to give Embry some quick head before we left here."

"Bine!" I scolded, trying to hide a smile.

"Ha, I'm just kidding, a little. I'll get to him later. You, on the other hand, have missed a lot." She laughed, grabbing my hand. We wove through the crowd, looking around. I glanced up at the front, seeing a bunch of tall, dark and shirtless men lounging at the door. I strained my neck to see if Jake might be in that group.

"No Bella. We're not going through that tonight." Bina said, jerking me away from the front. I looked back as she dragged me through the crowd, and saw the dark brown eyes of my beloved meet mine, sadness coursed through them after the recognition.

"Oh." I squeaked.

"What time is it?" Bina wondered out loud.

"Around six." A twenty-something guy answered, smiling at Bina.

"Why thank you sir." She smiled back, then looked at me.

"It'll be dark soon, let's head back to my house." Bina said firmly.

We walked back to her house, talking as much time as we could and talking. We went up into her room and gave each other makeovers to pass time and watched Footloose. When it was finally dark, around eight o'clock, she suggested we head down to the basement. Passing through the kitchen, she retreived my keys from my pocket and handed them to her dad. He took them without a word, even with a few from me.

Bina's basement was essentially made up of three couches and a couple chairs that were all collected at different times from spring cleanup. They were all in good condition, and it was where we hung out all throughout our childhood and teenage years. We were sitting on the carpet in the middle of the room, her smiling knowingly, and me confused.

"What are we doing?" I asked, completely unknowing.

"Well baby, you're having a hard time right now." She crawled over to one of the couches and reached under it, bringing out a bottle of lemonade. She sprawled over to another couch, and brought out two large glass bottles. "I feel like we just need a night like this to forget about problems."

"Oh my God!" I said, recognizing them as vodka bottles. "You want to get drunk tonight?"

"Why not?" She asked. "We might as well."

"No, I, I, I don't know if i can." I said, looking at the carpet.

"Yes, you can." Bina said firmly. She lifted my chin up with a finger, forcing my eyes to hers. "Bella, you're hurting. You need a night off."

"I guess you're right." I gave in. I could never hold up in an argument against Bina. She had an utterly final way of saying things.

Two cups appeared out of nowhere, and Bina was pouring before I could protest any more.

"Alright. Shots. Two of them, and then we can start with the mixes." She said, smiling as she handed a cup to me. "It's bitter. You'll hate it, but that's not a big deal."

"Alright, 3, 2, 1." I threw it back, feeling the bitter taste on my tongue and wanting to spit it out immediately. I swallowed anyway, setting the cup down as my face twisted without my say.

"Hate it? I know." She refilled, and I shot it back again. "Now we can move onto mix." She handed me the cup again and I tasted it. Not so bad. The bitterness of the lemonade almost rid the bitterness of the vodka.

"Not so bad." I said, giggling.

"You're feeling it already. You're a lightweight." Bina said. She took another shot before pouring her mix.

I finished my drink and half of another one within ten minutes. I felt tingly, and warm and lightheaded.

"Bina." I said, but couldn't help but giggle.

"Yes Bells?" She replied, leaning back against the chair.

"Nothin'." I said. The lightheadedness was rapidly progressing to the room spinning and me swaying. I couldn't keep a thought to myself, and rational me was telling drunk me not to cry.

"We can call Emerrbyyy to come over heyah. We can both satis..satisfy him." I whispered at Bina. She burst out laughing.

"Haahah, Bella. That's-hahahahahha-ridiculous." She doubled over and rolled on the ground.

"Yeah. Yeah." I sat there nodding. "Should we ..invite some , uh, p-people over here to spend time with us?" I asked slowly, it took about two minutes to say it.

"No, no party." Bina shook her head, downing her drink. Suddenly my brain switched over to Jacob.

"I love him, Bine." I said.

"I know." She replied.

"I wish we weren't apart." I said.

"I know." She replied.

"It's been a while." I said.

"I know. Maybe we can tell him how slizzard you are. He'll rush over."

"No." I launched myself towards her, landing in her lap. "He won't understand." I whispered. I downed the rest of my drink, then grabbed the whole bottle and took a couple gulps of the vodka.

"He'll...he'll understand. He always understands." Bina gurgled.

"Was this..." I started. Bina was quiet for a few minutes.

"What?"

"Was this...was this a bad idea?" I finished.

"Never."

I rolled around on the floor some more, taking turns drinking straight out of the bottle with Bina. We sat there for a while, I could feel my mouth moving and I was telling Bina everything about my feelings. Actually, I wasn't talking to Bina, I was talking to the bottle of vodka in my hand. I couldn't open my eyes-not that I wanted to anyway.

It seemed like no time had passed at all and I heard a male voice that I pinpointed as definitely being Embry.

"Embrrrryyyy." I gurgled.

"Bella," Bina's voice was hot in my ear, I giggled at the feeling. "Not that I don't love you, but I will be unresponsive for the next little while."

This meant Embry and Bina were going to go at it. Even my hazy mind knew. I waited until they were busy into it and left as silently as I could, determined to go to Jake's to tell him that I loved him. My lost sense of direction, the darkness and the inability to open my eyes got me lost because I knew that I was in a forest when I felt the soft moss under my feet. I was beginning to get tired and it felt like a soft, perfect place to lay down and sleep. I collapsed onto the softest bed I had ever felt and was asleep within seconds.


	21. Delineate

**AUTHORSNOTE!  
****I want to ask all of you loyal readers to do me a huge favour and reread, even skim through ****chapters 16,18 and 19****. I've made some small changes that are VERY pertinent to the story. I know you guys have had some questions, and you've been confused.. but I'm hoping this chapter will begin to answer some questions that you have.  
Also, because it can't be any more explained .. No. ****Embry has not imprinted on Bina****. Bina just enjoys naughty activities with Embry and Embry is completely okay with that, because he's so shy, he won't object. He adores Bina though, so he has no problem with it. I tried to explain Binas, er, extracurriculars with Bina doing favours for alcohol, and wanting Seth, haha, as well as being so brash and upfront about it in general.  
I hope that clears some things up, and the next chapter clears things up !

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"How the hell did she end up here?"

"Smells like she was drinking."

"She was."

"Why did you let her leave?"

"Why do you think, Em was getting his booty! Damn fine booty at that."

"Enough Quil."

"Wake her up?"

"No. Somebody go get Jake."

"You know sometimes this girl can be stupid."

"Well, keeping Jake away from her has made her slightly crazy, Sam."

"I'm afraid for them."

"That's stupid."

"I'm afraid he'll imprint. I've given him an order not to look into her eyes. An alpha order, but I feel terrible about it."

"What's so bad about it if he does?"

"...I don't know."

"Do you want to be the only imprinter around here?"

"No, it's not that."

"Maybe you should think about his happiness. Think about how miserable his thoughts have beeen without her."

I was only half listening to this conversation, convinced that it was a dream. With all these weird words that they were using, and Embry and Quil together, it couldn't possibly be real. It would have to be a projection of my mind and the stress that I've been through. The sun shining through the forest made me lose my bearings, then I remembered laying down on the bed of moss and going to sleep. I rolled over, covering my eyes from the sharp light that made my head hurt even more.

"He's coming. I just woke him up."

"Of course you woke him up. It's eight o'clock."

"It's not even that early."

The familiar voice came from far away, getting closer as I heard his almost silent footsteps through the ground.

"Hey guys what's...whoa. What is she doing here?"

"Embry will answer that question for you."

"Her and Bina got drunk. She wandered away."

"And you let her?"

"Emmy was getting lucky."

A sigh was audible.

"Alright, enough. Let's leave them alone. Jake, come with me for a moment."

Suddenly it was silent, everyone had gone. I fully woke up at that moment, disoriented and looked around. No one was standing there. Of course it would be a dream. Jake wouldn't be here. I closed my eyes and flopped back down, much to the protest of my screaming head.

Then hot arms were wrapping around me, pulling me close to their chest. The figure rocked me back and forth silently and slowly. Inhaling the sweet musky scent, I knew it was Jake. My heart filled with love and burst with excitement and relief at the fact that I was in Jake's arms again.

"Jake." I whispered, my voice hoarse.

"I'm here Bella. I'm here." He replied, kissing the top of my head.

"It's about time." I mumbled, wrapping my arms around him. He stiffened for half a second before relaxing again and was silent a few moments.

"I know." He sighed, defeat lacing his voice. "It's not my fault though Bells."

"I can't say I understand." I replied, opening my eyes and looking at his chin.

"I can't say I can help that." He said, letting out a great sigh.

"Why, why can't you help that?" I asked.

"Not right now Bella." Jake said exasperatedly. "I love you too much for that right now."

"I love you too Jakie." I murmured, smiling. Jake still loved me and he was here holding me and all was right.

The morning light turned soft, perhaps covered by a cloud. I sat up, staying close to Jake and put my face in front of his. I placed my hand on his soft, dark face and opened my eyes. His were downcast, looking at something on the ground between us.

"Jacob Black." I whispered. "Please look me in the eyes."

He stayed still for a few seconds, then slowly raised his dark eyes to meet mine. As they did, his jaw went slack, dropping and his eyes glazed over. First, a look of pure confusion, then a look of calm peace and unimaginable happiness came across his face. It stayed the same: glazed over eyes and a foolish smile for a few minutes before he shook himself out of his reverie.

"Wow." That was all he said after that

"Wow what, Jake?" I asked, tilting my head.

"You are so incredibly beautiful." He smiled, tilting his head to match mine.

"Thank you?" I asked. There was something adoring in the way he said it, something off.

"I can promise you that we won't be spending all too much time apart anymore." He said, relaxing visibly. I relaxed as well, realizing how stressing it was not to have him around.

"Thats great." I smiled, thinking about how great it actually was.

Jake stood up and reached out for my hand, which I happily took. I stood up with him, feeling the dizziness of last nights events.

"Excuse me for one moment." I said, covering my mouth and running off. Regrets of last night hit me and came up, vile and chunky as I spit it over the forest floor. Jake was there, holding my hair back for me and rubbing my back as I dry-heaved for a couple minutes until I could compose myself.

"Thank you." I said, spitting one last time and wiping my mouth. When I stood up again, Jake gathered me into his arms, smoothing my hair back.

"It was really no problem." Jake murmured into my-probably very dirty-hair. He then let me go, his hand sliding down to take mine and we walked out of the woods. I recognized the place as we exited. I was so close to being at Jake's last night, if only I had walked a couple more feet. I would have broke through the path almost directly across from his house.

"You're lucky that you didn't stray any farther into the woods." Jake said, with the 'parent-tone'

"I was looking for you. You wouldn't be in the woods." I replied. He was quiet for a few moments.

"Then why were you there?" He asked, looking down at me, eyebrow raised.

"I don't remember how I got there." I laughed. He chuckled with me.

Bina was sitting on Jake's front step when we walked in the driveway, in Embry's lap of course. His face was buried in her neck and she was clearly enjoying it, her hand behind her back. I had no question about what it was touching. Jake cleared his throat obviously, making them snap to attention. She removed her hand and Embry, blushing a dark red, zippered up his jeans.

"Bella. I was so worried when I realized that you were gone!" She cried, throwing her arms around me. "However, I was too drunk and too naked to come find you. I would have gotten just as lost."

"That's fine. I was only looking for Jake." I replied, smiling as I backed into his body.

"And you found him!" She grinned sardonically.

"He found me, actually." I laughed.

Bina excused Embry and herself and bounded down the road, Embry being dragged after her. Jake looked down at me fondly, and brushed his lips against mine gently. He took my hand again and brought me inside to his room, where the blanket on his bed was thrown haphazardly away. We layed down, bodies as close as we could manage, his forehead pressed against mine.

"I think you're forgetting something." I said softly. He chuckled, and took a moment to sit up and rip his shirt off before assuming the position he had been in before.

"I never want us to be apart like has happened lately, Bells." He said, smoothing my hair back again. "And I'm going to promise to you that it won't. I cannot hurt you ever again."

"Thank you Jacob. It's been hard without you. I've been so confused." I almost cried at the memory of it, a tear freed itself from my eyelashes. Jake immediately wiped it away.

"I think I may be able to tell you why. I just have to go talk to Sam about it first." Jake said.

"Why do you have to check in with Sam about it?" I asked, immediately on the defense, my temper flaring. Jake didn't answer, just kissed my forehead, my eyelids, my cheeks, my jawline, my neck and finally my lips.

"You'll find out. Definitely." Was all he said. I sighed, but decided not to fight it: to just stay in Jake's arms as long as I could.


	22. Iniquity

When I awoke sometime later to the late morning sun filtering in through Jake's window, I was still deathly tired. I figured that a nice hot shower would wake me up, so I quietly slipped off the bed, not even close to disturbing Jake's sleep. He was snoring slightly, his arm thrown over his head and his mouth open. I smiled, brushing my hand through his soft, shorn hair before walking off to the bathroom, careful not to disturb my vulnerable stomach, which was still hurting from the alcohol last night.

I took off yesterday's clothes and got in the shower, turning the heat up until it was almost too hot to bear and got in. To say it felt good would be an understatement. I stood in the steady, hot stream for a couple minutes before washing off my body and washing my hair. When I was satisfied, I got out and dried off, first drying my hair with the towel and then wrapping it around me and walking into Jake's room.

When I got there, Jake was sitting on the edge of his bed, hands folded neatly in his lap, seeming to be waiting for me. All he had on was his boxers, his chiseled chest was bare and dark and his hair was a ruffled mess. I studied it for a moment before saying anything. He looked gorgeous.

"Hey love." I said softly. His head snapped up and his jaw went slack as he looked me over, before an arrogant grin spread across his face.

"I must say, this is a nice way to wake up." He said, still smiling as he stood up and walked over to me, placing his hands on my waist. He bent his head down to meet my eager lips in a soft embrace, slowly backing up towards his bed, never breaking the kiss as he parted my lips with his and slowly worked his tongue against mine. I responded immediately, following suit. He sat down, slowly and easily pulling my legs around him so that I was sitting in his lap. Immediately I noticed that there had never been so little fabric between us before. It was exhilarating to feel so much and so little at the same time, I knew that it would happen soon; it almost felt like there was a pull towards it. I felt him harden underneath me, the only thing separating us was his boxers. If only I could get them off. Or...

I let the towel drop and pressed my naked breasts to his chest. The sharp intake of his breath meant that he noticed, and the almost inaudible sigh meant that he enjoyed it. Was I really ready for this? Jake's hand fluttered across my abdomen, but didn't go any further. Right at that moment, I knew that this wasn't the time.

We both broke away at the same time. Jake readjusted my towel for me, being a perfect gentleman, and slid me off him. I felt the familiar wetness between my legs and saw his excitement as well, before he tried to tuck it away under his waistband, even if it wasn't very efficient at hiding any part of it.

"Um..." He started, scratching the back of his head and looking around.

"Yeah, uh.." I replied, looking to where he was.

"Clothes, you want clothes." He said, then loped over to his dresser, where he pulled the top drawer open and started digging through it.

"I don't want-" I started, but he turned around and cut me off by holding up a pair of my clothes. Clothes that I knew I hadn't lost, but had no idea of the location of.

"Thank you!" I said brightly. He smiled back, his face shining more than I imagine mine could.

"No problem. Are you hungry?" Jake asked, stepping close to me again. My breath caught in my throat.

"N-No thanks." I swallowed. He smiled down at me.

"Alright, but while you're getting dressed, I'm going to go have something to eat." He said, kissing my forehead and sauntering towards the door, his long legs carrying him quickly over. He stopped as he approached it, and with a dark hand on the white doorframe, he turned around, his eyes crinkling at me. "Come out when you're done." He winked and I heard him go out to the kitchen.

I quickly got dressed and hurried out to the kitchen, where Jake looked like he was well into his second bowl of Cheerios.

"Hey Bells." He smiled as I sat down across from him at the little table.

"Hey, so what's the plan for today?" I asked, leaning my head onto my elbow. Jake didn't answer, just looked out the window thoughtfully.

"I thought that you could meet Sam." He said quietly, his eye flicking to mine.

"Sam?" I asked, immediately on the defensive. I leaned back in my chair and crossed my arms. "I've already met him."

"No, you haven't. He's a really great guy. He's helped me a lot, and I think talking to him could benefit us." Jake pleaded, his brown eyes wide.

"I don't want to associate with him." I carefully avoided eye contact with Jake. He was quiet for a while, but then let out a small groan of anguish.

"Please Bella, will you do this one thing for me?" He asked.

"You hated him, Jake! Then all of a sudden, he was the greatest thing to happen to you. I don't know what's up with that, but I don't want any part of it."

"Bells," Jake said, his voice wobbling, as if he was struggling to keep his anger in check. "He can explain it all, but I can't without his say."

"You don't seem to be able to do anything without consulting him first! I don't know if you're even your own person anymore." I almost yelled. I was standing at this point, leaning over the table. Jake was shaking slightly.

"That's not it at all. He's great and I've been having some problems lately that he's guided me through because he's been there." Jake peered up at me, his eyes filled with a sadness that seemed to old for him. I sank down to his level.

"Why can't I be the one to help you with your problems?" I whispered.

"You wouldn't be able to help me with this." He whispered back, even lower. I stood up, insulted and went to the door, yanking it open.

"Well, when I can help you with something, then maybe you can let me know." I said, holding eye contact with him and pouring as much venom into the words as possible before stepping out of the house and slamming the door behind me. I held my head up high, walking to the covered clearing where I had left my truck the day prior.

I was too angry to cry, too angry to go back and apologize. I didn't want to meet Sam, I didn't want Jake to have anything to do with him. I started the truck and ripped out of the parking lot, not caring if anyone heard me leaving. I was almost hoping they would, so theyd know how angry I was.

But as I was driving, I cooled down. Driving seemed to be the one thing that could calm me down. I realized that this was the second time that I had ripped out of La Push with my truck and I let out a laugh. It felt good, so I let out another one. I laughed most of the way home.

Charlie wasn't there when I got home; he was probably working. I went up to my room and sat on the edge of my bed, hanging my head. Things seemed to be getting out of my control lately. I seemed to be doing things that I wouldn't normally. Like when I had let Edward kiss me, when I almost gave in to his charm.

Then it hit me. Edward. I reached over to my nightstand and picked up the slip of paper that I had found in the flowers. I remembered what he said to me as he was close.

_If you ever need something, to talk, anything, I'll be there for you. _He had whispered into my ear. At the time it hadn't meant anything, why would I need Edward when I had someone as perfect as Jake? Fact. I didn't. Jake was my one and only, he was everything and more to me; my whole universe. But right now, I was pissed. At Jake, and if this made him mad, then hell, I'd let him be mad.

I fingered the slip of paper, rolling it around in my hands. It wasn't even paper really, it was parchment, a rectangle cut from what was probably a bigger piece, but it was so perfect, it looked like it had been printed that way. Elegant numbers were spread across the paper. An internal debate raged on inside of me.

Should I do it? He's a friend, and he'd be there for me.

But Bella, what if he wants more than friendship.

Then find Alice. She'll help you get away.

And if he pulls what he pulled out by your truck the other day?

You're strong, you can resist it.

That did it. I could resist Edward. I ran downstairs and picked up the phone, dialing the seven numbers written on the piece of paper, and listened to the phone ring, my heart beating wildly out of my chest.

"Hello?" A voice asked. I nearly fainted.

"H-Hello. This is Bella Swan calling, I'm looking for Edward."

"Edward? Oh, just a moment dear." I heard the phone being set down and not even a second after that, it was picked up again, and the low, musical voice caressed my ear.

"Good afternoon Bella."

"Hi Edward." I said, recognizing that voice anywhere.

"How are you today, and may I ask why you're calling?" He said it as if he knew why, and he only wanted to hear it from me.

"I just wanted to...talk. Hang out or something. As friends." My voice would definitely never be as fluid as his was. Not even if I lived a hundred years.

"Well, I can come pick you up and we can hang out for a while today, if you want." his voice carried through my ears, beautiful.

"Alright. That sounds okay." I replied.

"You can meet my family. Don't even worry about it, they'll love you." He said, and the line went dead. I stared at the receiver in horror. He wanted me to meet his parents. I didn't say that I wanted that. I just wanted to hang out, but this sounded as if he might want something serious.

No, I reassured myself. He didn't. We were friends, and he knew that I had a boyfriend. Everything would be okay.

A soft knock on the door startled me, and made me realize that I was still holding the receiver, gripping and worrying it while I thought. I hung it up and walked to the door, opening it.

"Hello." He said with a smile.

"Hi." I replied shortly.

"Are you ready?" He asked, sticking out an elbow for me to take. He looked down at me, and his nose was slightly wrinkled, like he smelled something gross. Maybe it was me.

"Do I smell?" I asked, lifting up my arm to smell my armpit in an unladylike fashion.

"No, it's not you that smells." He reassured me, and with that I wrapped my fingers around his elbow and he led me to his Volvo, opening the passenger door for me.

"Thank you." I smiled, sitting in the car.

He went around to the driver's side and got in, starting the car up and driving out. We sat in silence for the drive there, he took us to the outskirts of town, and started slowing down, even though I didn't see a driveway in sight. As he was turning, I noticed the driveway, unnoticeable from the road. It was long, but as soon as the house came into view, I gasped. It was beautiful. Probably a hundred years old, the huge white house was graceful and timeless. I realized I was sitting there, looking at it with my jaw open when Edward opened the car door and held his hand out for me to take. I ignored it and stepped out at the car, keeping my eyes on the beautiful house.

"Bella! I can't believe you're here!" Alice's voice preceded her as she bounded down the steps and swept me up in her unexpectedly strong arms for a hug. Her sweet scent invaded my nose as her hair swept across my face. "I was so excited when I saw that you called!"

"Yeah, I needed to hang out somewhere that wasn't at home today." I replied lowly.

"Cute, come in! You can meet the family." Alice slipped her cold hand into mine and pulled me along. I looked back at Edward, but he was sitting there, a deathly handsome crooked smile on his face as he stood back and let Alice take over. He followed us inside, to where Dr. Cullen stood, with what I guessed to be his wife.

"Dr. Cullen!" I said in surprise as we stopped in front of them.

"Call me Carlisle." He said, stepping forward and holding out his hand. He smiled at me, and I noticed his eyes, like Edward's and Alice's were the same shade of light gold. A dimple in his cheek stood out as I took his hand and shook it. "This is my wife Esme."

"Hi Carlisle and Esme." I said, smiling back and shaking Esme's hand. "It's nice to meet you."

"We hope you enjoy your visit here." Esme said, her eyes crinkling with delight.

"Yes, but we'll get out of the way. You kids have fun." Carlisle took Esme's hand and turned her around. They walked away, heads close and giggling like kids. Then my eyes found the rest of the house. It was a bright and huge open room, one whole wall made of windows.

"This place is beautiful." I said, staring around in wonder, much like I had at the outside of the house.

"Thank you. I helped Esme renovate it before we moved in." Alice replied, standing beside me, smiling hugely. "So, how opposed are you to a makeover?"

"Not in the mood." I replied. "Sorry."

"Oh, it's no problem. You're just one of those people who I feel would make a perfect Barbie for me. You're just so cute!" Alice gave a little bounce. "Someday you'll let me though, won't you?"

"Maybe someday." I said, giving her a small smile.

"Oh, I know you will." She grinned, looking at Edward, and I followed her eyes to his face, watching his eyes widen, then his expression fall.

"So Bella, what kind of activities are you interested in?" Edward asked, his voice soft and low.

"I like to watch movies." I replied, shrugging. "We could do that."

"Yes! Then let's go to the movie room." Alice hopped up the stairs before I could even comprehend, and I looked back at Edward blankly.

"She just gets excited sometimes." He smiled politely at me. "Come, I will show you the way." He started walking, waiting until I fell into step with him before ascending the stairs. I followed Edward past three doors before he went into the fourth, me close behind.

I hadn't been expecting what I saw in there, stopping in the doorway to take it all in. There were a couple leather couches with the most comfortable looking cushions I had ever seen, and two walls painted black. The other two were dedicated to shelf after shelf of movies. All DVD's. The couches were all arranged around a huge flat-screen television mounted on the wall.

"Turns out we like to watch movies too." Alice giggled from behind one of the couches. Sitting on it in front of her was a man whom I had not noticed before. He sat lazily, one leg thrown across the arm, his long blonde curls falling into his golden eyes. He was lean, quite leonine and very attractive as he looked at me lazily.

"This is Jasper." Edward said, gesturing towards the man.

"My soul mate." Alice added, reaching a hand down to stroke his face. He leaned into it, nuzzling her hand. "Jazz, this is Bella."

"Nice to meet you." I said quietly, thinking I heard an implication when Alice had said my name.

"The pleasure is all mine." He replied, his voice very soft and direct, with something of a Southern twang to it.

"What do you feel like watching today?" Edward asked, walking over to the collection of movies. He scanned them thoughtfully.

"What have you got?" I teased, walking over so that I was standing beside him, then looked the movies over.

"They're arranged alphabetically in release decade." Edward said helpfully.

"I've always wanted to watch_ Breakfast at Tiffany's_." I said, pulling the movie out of it's place.

"Ooohh! That's one of my favorite movies." Alice squealed coming over and taking it out of my hands. "_Breakfast at Tiffany's_ it is!"

I sat down on the couch that wasn't occupied and felt Edward sit down next to me, probably closer than he should have, but I let it slide. Alice skipped the previews and started the movie quickly, settling down in Jasper's arms.

We were halfway through the movie, when I felt cold fingers brush against my arm. I didn't react, hoping that it was an accident, but they brushed against my arm again. I looked up at Edward, but he was watching the movie, or appeared to be. I noticed Alice and Jasper stand up out of the corner of my eye.

"Where are you guys going?" I asked, probably louder than I should have.

"We're just going to get a snack." Alice smiled at Jasper. "I think we have some Turtles in the cupboard." With that, they vanished out the door without a sound. I looked over at Edward, who was now looking at me, the dark circles under his eyes illuminated by the light of the television. My eyes found his and I was enraptured. I couldn't look away if I had tried. He reached a hand up and brushed it across my face.

"Bella, I think you like me." He said softly, moving closer. I couldn't answer, I was paralyzed by his golden eyes. "Do you like me?"

I nodded my head slowly, watching his pupils dilate and contract, in my head screaming 'AS FRIENDS!', but my mouth wouldn't make the words.

"Bella," He said, leaning in, keeping eye contact with me. His pupils dilated and contracted again "May I kiss you?"

I nodded again, and slowly, ever so softly, he leaned in, keeping his eyes on mine. His hand brushed my face again and wound into my hair, softly holding the back of my head. His cold lips met mine and he closed his eyes. It was then that my brain and mouth started working again as I pulled back fast enough to give me whiplash.

"NO!" I yelled, and his face was a look of surprise at first, and then contorted into an angry look I'd never thought him capable of. He looked like a monster, and I scrambled backwards, over the couch cushion and onto the floor, landing on my back and bouncing into the wall behind me. Pain shot out everywhere in my body as my lungs let out any excess air that was in them.

"Edward, what are you doing?" A voice asked incredulously. An angel came over to me, I saw her through my half-closed eyes. Blonde and pale, she glowed as my saviour.

"Home." I croaked, and she picked me up with ease. The angel was taking me away from Edward, away from that monster.

"Emmett, keep Edward in here." The angel said, speaking over her shoulder, her voice sounding like bells of the heavens. She took me out of the movie room and into another room. "Carlisle, she fell off the couch and hit her head on the wall trying to get away from Edward. He was using it on her. Again."

"Again? Edward is in some trouble now." I heard Dr. Cullen say, almost angrily. I was set down on some flat surface and I felt him poking squeezing, checking my body over for any broken bones or pain of any sort. I felt so drowsy, I tried to close my eyes to go to sleep.

"Bella, I need you to stay awake." Dr. Cullen said, as he opened my eyes and shone a flashlight into them.

"Is she alright?" The angel asked, sounding almost worried.

"She has a mild concussion. No broken bones or anything. She'll be sore for the next couple of days, but that was a lucky fall. She definitely could have broken her tailbone or spine on that." Dr. Cullen said. "Do you mind taking her home and putting her into her bed, Rose?"

"No, I can do that." She said. "I just carry her down to the car."

"You don't have to keep her awake, in fact, you should let her sleep. Don't disturb her if she does fall asleep, just carry her up into bed and leave. It should be fine."

"Alright." She said, and I felt the ground disappear from me again. I kept my eyes closed

"Take the Mercedes." Dr. Cullen said, she turned and started walking, but I could barely feel myself being moved.

All of a sudden, I was being placed in a car and strapped in. I didn't bother opening my eyes, just sunk down into the soft purr of the dark car and fell asleep.


	23. Enlightened

"Bella. You stink." I heard a voice say. A very familiar voice. I didn't even open my eyes as I felt the edge of my bed sink and a hand on my head.

"Suck it." I replied, rolling over, pulling the blanket over my head.

"No Bells. Come out and play." Jake laughed, pulling the blanket down again. I halfed rolled over and opened an eye, peekeing up at him.

"What do you want?" I said into the pillow. Jake was all smiles today, his broad mouth open and white teeth showing through. He ran the back of his hand across my cheek.

"I want you to get out of bed and hug me." He said, smiling still.

"You just told me I stink." I replied, not moving. "I don't need to get out of bed and hug you." Jake faltered a small bit.

"So I did. But it's not like it's not true." I felt Jake shrug. I snapped the covers off my face and rolled over.

"Fine I'll go shower." I said and ran to the bathroom.

When I came back, Jake was sitting exactly where he had been when I left. He stood up as he saw me enter the room.

"Better mood now?" He asked, taking only a few short steps towards me and sweeping me up in his arms, hugging my waist.

"Ouch, not so hard." I said, cringing away from him, feeling the effects of falling off the couch last night for the first time.

"What? What is it, Bells?" Jake asked, worriedly, putting his hand to my face. What indeed, I thought, remembering in horror the events of the previous night. I could feel the pain, starting at my tailbone and reaching all the way up to my neck and the top of my head. I felt bruised everywhere.

"I guess I might as well tell you then." I mumbled, looking at the floor. I saw Jake stiffen.

"Tell me what." He asked cautiously, enunciating each syllable.

"Last night, when I left you..." I started, trying to figure out the nicest way to tell him.

"You went up to the Cullen's." He finished, looking forlorn.

"How did you know?" I asked in surprise.

"A lucky guess, I suppose." He said sadly.

"Well, I figured that Alice and Edward could distract me from our fight, so I called him and he picked me up and brought me to their house. I met Dr. Cullen and his wife, and we went up to the movie room to watch a movie. It was Edward, Alice, Jasper and I. All of a sudden, Alice and Jasper left, and Edward looked me in the eye, and I'm not sure what happened, but he convinced me to kiss him, but I moved backward, fell off the couch and hit my head on the wall. I ended up with a mild concussion and Rosalie drove me home and put me to bed." I said the last part fondly. I owed Rosalie so much for saving me. "It's why I hurt today."

"Bella," Jake's voice cracked a little bit, as he looked at me, his eyes shining. "I thought I made it clear about my dislike for them."

"You can't choose my friends, Jacob." I seethed back.

"I'm not!" He said, putting his hands up in defense. "I just want you to know how bad they can be for you."

"Have you dealt with them before?" I asked, leaning in towards him.

"I have, actually. I don't find them very good company." He replied, looking out the window. "But this means now, more than ever, you're going to have to come with me."

"Where are we going?" I asked, looking up at him.

"Bella." He said, leaning in and brushing his lips against mine, softly. "I love you."

"Ready?" A voice asked from the doorway. I spun around and found Quil and Embry standing there, arms crossed over their impossibly muscled chests and grinning widely. They offered no escape from the bedroom and my fight or flight response kicked in, hard.

"Where are we going?" I asked, my voice shaking. "And why would you need Quil and Embry here to help you?"

"We're just going to the reservation." Jake said lowly, looking at Quil and Embry. I looked at them as well, as they shared a meaningful look.

Jake led us down the stairs and I followed; Embry in front of me and Quil behind me. We got in the truck, fitting in nicely because of the long bench seat. I sat between Quil and Embry as Jake got into the driver's seat and started driving towards the reservation.

It was when we bypassed Jake's house, Quil's house, Bina's house and Embry's house that I started to wonder what was going on. With Embry and Quil on either side of me, seemingly for protection, it made it seem like they could be here to stop me from trying to run away. Then I realized: Jake was taking me to Sam's like he'd planned all along. I lurched forward in my seat. Well, I tried, but both Quil and Embry's arms shot out to hold me back.

"Why?" I cried out, trying my hardest against them.

"You need this." Jake said softly. "I need you to know this."

"No!" I yelled viciously. Jake pulled up to a small, unfamiliar house, and turned off the truck. He got out and waited. Quil slid out of the truck and he and Embry caught me right away, holding me to them, with no chance of escaping. I thrashed, but they kept a firm hold on me, walking easily over to the door. I felt myself slipping and took advantage of it, thrashing and squirming around some more. I dropped from their grasp in surprise and tried to run. Jake caught me and swung me up into his arms, holding me close to him and walking into the door and setting me on a chair. His hands didn't leave me, in a place where I knew I couldn't get away.

"Please Bella, Sam wants to talk to you." Jake said, trying to get me to understand. I didn't want to.

"You can make me stay here, but you can't make me listen!" I yelled at him. He was shocked at first, but then his eyes filled with such sadness that he looked away. My heart almost broke at the sight of it, I would never want Jake to be sad, but considering the circumstances, I didn't care.

"You've got yourself a spicy one here, Jacob." Sam said mildly, coming in. I looked him with as much contempt as I could muster.

"Sorry to interrupt, but does anyone want a cinnamon roll? Freshly made!" A girl said, coming in through the swinging door off the room. She was holding a plate of delicious looking pinwheels, and I felt my mouth water at the sight and smell, noticing my empty stomach. I finally looked at the girl's face and my jaw dropped. Jake's finger was immediately under my jaw, pushing it back up to a closed position.

"Don't stare." He whispered, so only I could hear. She must have been pretty at one point in her life, with exotic good looks and nearly flawless skin. Except for three long, jagged scars that ran down the left side of her face, that looked like they were only recently healed.

"This is Emily, Bella." Sam said, walking over to her, then added in a lower, gentler whisper to Emily. "Can you step out for a couple minutes? Maybe go feed the hungry boys outside. Tell them not to come in."

"Alright." She said softly, and Sam brushed a couple of fingers across her face, gingerly. She turned and left. That's when I realized that she was the one who took Sam away from Leah and I shot a dirty look at her. Sam turned to me, looking sullen and pulled a chair up in front of me, turned it backwards and sat in it that way: casually, making it look like a child's chair. Jake moved around behind me, putting his hands on my shoulder to keep me in the chair.

"What do you want." I asked, crossing my arms over my chest. Sam seemed to deliberate a moment.

"I can't tell you if you don't want to listen." He said, casting his eyes downwards. "I mean, I guess you don't even want to know why you weren't allowed to see Jake a couple weeks ago, why you couldn't get a hold of him."

I sat up straighter in my chair.

"This doesn't mean that I like you." I spat. "But I guess I want to listen."

"There's the spirit." Sam said, his expression lightening, but only slightly. He still had an ominous look upon his face. "Do you really want to hear this?"

"I guess so." I replied.

"Yes?"

"Yes." I said reluctantly. Sam was thoughtful a moment before he spoke.

"Okay, you know of the story of Taha Aki?"

"The one where Utlapa steals Taha Aki's body and then he goes and finds a wolf to share his body with and suddenly transforms into a human, the flesh interpretation of his spirit? Then Taha Aki kills Utlapa and then has like, a hundred children? Only a thousand times."

"Yes, when these children approached manhood, they too changed into wolves." Sam said heavily. "It is said that we are all descendants of Taha Aki to a certain degree."

"I know that too." I said. "I'm hoping that this is leading somewhere." Jake squeezed my shoulders.

"It is." Sam nodded. "It is said that when there is a presence of Cold One's, the transformations take place. Right now, some ticking biological clock has changed inside of us, sensing that there is a need to protect our people. Legends also tell of a pack consisting of Ephraim Black, Levi Uley and Quil Ataera l. My great grandfather, Jacob's as well as Quil's."

"Okay. What does this have to do with your little cult?" I asked, then almost realized it, something at the back of my brain was nagging at me, but I couldn't quite grasp at it. Sam let out a short bark of a laugh.

"Bella, this is hardly a cult." He said, almost smiling. "But this is a serious matter. Some kind of disturbance here has triggered something in our genetics. There is a presence of the Cold Ones here again, so something has happened with the boys here who are of Quileute descent."

I stayed silent, waiting for him to go on. The next part seemed to be extremely hard for him to say. I waited patiently.

"What I'm getting at is that we, and by we I mean myself, Jacob, Quil, Embry, Jared and Paul. We have the ability to change into wolves. Werewolves."

I stared at him, stunned. _Wolves?_

"Yes, wolves." Sam said sadly. I hadn't realized I said it out loud. "I didn't, by any means, mean to steal Jake away from you. I was just trying to help him with the process, and to protect you from something like..." he visibly choked on his words. "I didn't want Jake to make the same mistake I did."

Those marks on Emily's face. They were from Sam. They were from him changing into a werewolf.

"Do you just change?" I asked, unbelieving. This had to be a story they were spinning.

"It is triggered by anger, the first change. A new werewolf changes every time he gets angry, and he has to work controlling that. It took me two weeks to calm down to change back." Sam said.

"I-I just can't believe this. I don't know if I can believe that you guys are werewolves." I said hesitantly. Jake's hands left my shoulders, and suddenly they felt cold.

"There has been a lot of telltale signs of this." Sam waved a hand unceremoniously. "The growth spurt, the obvious new muscles, the fact that Jake hasn't been around, the fact that he hated me until he found out what we were, then was alright with me."

"I guess those are telltale signs." I said, still thinking that this was a trick Jake decided to play on me.

"I saved you a cinnamon roll." Emily said, coming in, and Sam looked over. I watched his eyes grow from old and tired to completely loving, like Emily was his world. The change of facial expression on his face was bizarre.

"Thank you love." He said, his voice dripping with love. He turned back to us. "I know Jake wants to talk to you alone, so I'll leave you." He took Emily around the waist and escorted her out the door. Jake walked around in front of me and turned the chair around and sat down as close as he could get. He took my hands in his, levelling his eyes to mine.

"I can't believe any of this." I said, shaking my head.

"I didn't expect you to right away." He replied solemnly. "It was a lot for even me to take in."

"I could just walk out this door right now and go home." I said.

"I wouldn't stop you." He said sadly, looking away. "But there's something I want you to know first?"

"What is it?" I gasped. Jake looked back up at me.

"You see, as werewolves, there's this thing that happens. You're my soulmate, Bella."

"We already knew that, silly." I said, without humour.

"It's called imprinting" He ignored my jibe. "And it happens. I don't know how to explain it, but you saw the way Sam looked at Emily, it's because he _imprinted_ on her. All I can say about it is that when you look into the eyes of that person; your soulmate, you feel everything that you were attached to being cut off, and suddenly only this person matters to you. Your connections all snipped away and gravity shifts. It's you and this person."

"Are you trying to tell me that you imprinted?" I asked incredulously. The word sounded foreign coming out of my mouth.

"I did." He confirmed. I dropped my head.

"This is it? Who with?" I mumbled sadly, bracing myself for the hurt about to come-like what had happened with Leah. I was going to be as bitter and as sad as her. I could feel the tears welling up already, my throat constricting painfully. Jake let out a short laugh. Great, he was making fun of me now. He lifted my chin up again.

"_You_, Bella. I imprinted on_ you_." He smiled. My heart lifted. Oh thank the Lord. He wasn't breaking up with me.

"I still don't know what to think about this." I said lowly.

"I know, but it's okay." His voice was soft. "I'll give you all the time you need to come to terms with it. I've barely even so far."

I stood up. Jake matched my action, wrapping his arms around me like he couldn't bear to let me go.

"I-I think that I need a little time to think about all of this." I whispered. He let me go, and placed a kiss on my cheek.

"Don't think I'll leave you alone though. I felt it was something that you needed to know." Jake whispered back. "I feel terrible about how I ignored you in those first few weeks."

"See you later Jake." I said, turning and walking out the door. I had a lot of thinking to do, and it best be done alone.


	24. Waylay

I went to school on Monday morning with my mind still racing from the events of Sunday. I still couldn't process what Jake had told me very well, and I wished that I could talk it through with someone who wasn't Jake, or part of the "pack". Jake had warned me before I left that it was a secret, and begged me not to share it with anyone else. So, it turned out, Bina didn't know, nor did Leah. I couldn't even go to my friends.

I had sat at the table Sunday night, staring at Charlie and wishing that he could know so that I could ask him all the questions that were running through my head. Is this real life? Is this just fantasy? I had chuckled at the reference, causing Charlie to look at me funny, bringing me back to the start of my thoughts. How could this happen? Could this even be real, or was he just messing with me? He could have just hit a growth spurt...all of them...at the same time. Maybe.

"Hey Bella." Angela greeted me happily in homeroom, smiling up at me from inside Ben's arms. They were an adorable couple, they made me smile looking at how in love they were.

"Hey guys. What's up?" I asked, smiling back, covering up any concerns about Jake. I wouldn't be able to talk to them about it anyway.

"Back to school again." Mike sighed, turning around. "Just like every other Monday. I'm happy winter's coming. We might have some snow days this year."

I laughed, and sat down next to him, listening to a story of what him and Tyler had done last night while they were driving around . It was definitely entertaining, and I listened and laughed with him as he told it.

The bell rang, and everyone bustled out of the room to go to first class. I stared after Angela, hand in hand with Ben, and wish I could have talked to her about it. She was probably the only outside person who would listen and understand. I got up, sighing sadly and left the room.

Jessica caught up to me in Spanish, linking her arm with mine and chatting happily. We went into the room and sat down at the same table; Jessica only breaking in speech to take some breaths.

"Bella, have you and Jake ever done... the deed?" She asked, lowering her voice dramatically as she turned to me. I raised my eyebrows at her, almost expecting the question, whether now or later on.

"Wow, you're just going to come right out and ask?" I said, raising my eyebrows with a smile.

"Sure, I mean, it's not like it's that big of a deal to talk about." She chattered, shrugging it off, not even bashful.

"Well, no. We haven't." I answered thoughtfully.

"Oh, you've almost though, haven't you?" She jumped a little in her seat.

"Yeah, I guess you could put it that way." I replied, shrugging. "Have you with anybody?"

"Yeah, Eric and I dated about a year ago." She said nonchalantly, and lowered her voice. "Don't let his skinnyness fool you though, he was .. gifted." She winked. I laughed.

"Good to know." I eyed Eric at the back of the classroom.

"You know Mike looks at you like he wants you. I was hoping you wouldn't mind, but then I said I was silly if I took over him. I think that he and I should date." She smiled, realizing how dumb she had sounded there. "Shit, I just asked if you minded if we dated. You have a boyfriend. I'm so dumb sometimes."

"For the record, no. I don't mind at all. I didn't have any dibs on him or anything." I giggled at her.

"Well, that was my way of telling you." She shook her hair over her shoulder as the bell to commence class rang, cutting our conversation short.

It was an extraordinarily warm day, and everyone had decided that they would eat outside; especially my group of friends who had raced to be the first ones out. I got my lunch and started to head out to the hidden courtyard when a figure stepped in front of me. A certain figure that got my blood rushing-not in a good way, either. Everything from his bronze hair to his unblemished porcelain skin and golden eyes. Even his subtle designer clothes.

"What." I spat at him, furrowing my brow at him.

"I just wanted to talk to you about what happened the other night." He said softly, staring straight into my eyes. He wasn't even ashamed of what happened.

"Well, I don't." I hissed, and tried to walk around him, but he stepped in front of me again, putting a hand on my arm.

"Don't touch me." I said levelly, taking a step backwards.

"Can't we just talk?" He asked, trying to look into my eyes. I looked past him.

"I just want to go sit down." I replied irritably. "And no, I'm not going to forgive you. What you did the other night was terrible." He looked mildly surprised.

"Forgive me? I wasn't asking for forgiveness." He looked confused, but took a step towards me again. "Bella, I-"

"Alright, I think I've let this go on long enough." A beautiful voice said, as I saw an arm cut in between us and push Edward backwards away from me. "Emmett wouldn't let me come over here before this but now, I'm stopping this." I found that the source was Rosalie, looking at Edward menacingly.

"Rosalie, this hardly concerns you." Edward said calmly, looking at her.

"This definitely concerns me." She said venomously. Her beautiful face distorted with rage for a moment. Emmett then stepped in, putting his hand on Edwards shoulders and dragging him backwards. Rosalie turned to me with his retreating figure.

"You're okay, right?" She asked, looking at me kindly. Definitely not how I'd expect someone with looks like this to ever look at me.

"Yeah, I'm fine. I'm not completely sure what his intentions are though." I replied, looking down.

"Neither am I, but I don't trust whatever he's up to with you." She said.

"Thank you for stopping that." I said, looking up at her. "I really appreciate it, and for the other night."

"That was no problem." She said. "I hope you have a decent day after this."

"Thanks, you too." I said, turning to walk away.

"Oh, Bella?" Rosalie added, almost as an afterthought. I turned back towards her.

"Yeah?" I asked, looking at her, trying to make my shoulders straight.

"Will you do me a huge favour, and not look into Edward's eyes if you can help it?" Her eyebrows raised, transforming her face into a look of worry.

"I think I can do that." I nodded.

"Thanks again." She said, pursing her lips. With that, we both walked away to our respective groups.

There was a chorus of questions about what exactly had happened there. Everyone looked at me, confused and questioning. It seemed that I was gossip central lately. I blushed at the direct attention from all-well, most of the members of the group. I sat down and swung my legs in, explaining to them all about what had happened on Saturday night. With their faces the appropriate disgust and contempt, they commented.

"That's disgusting. I can't believe I had a thing for him, he's an animal." Jessica said, disdainfully. She glanced over towards where Edward was lounging with a glare. Edward turned his head and I saw a glimpse of a smile before he turned away.

"Wow Bella, you have the worst luck." Eric said, and I remembered the accidents that I'd had since I moved here.

"I do, I'm just an unlucky person. It might rub off on all of you, watch out." I grinned around.

"I doubt it. I think you want to keep it all to yourself." Tyler flashed a smile my way, and laughed.

"I think that the animalistic part of Edward is sexy." Lauren put in, looking at Edward ardently.

"I think you're disgusting." I threw at her. She merely sneered at me.

"Watch it new girl, you're not exactly hot stuff yourself."

"You know what Lauren? You got beef? Prove you're all that and fight me." I stood up, having had enough of Lauren and still wired from the encounter with Edward, I put my hands out. "I've had enough of you being a bitch to everyone here, acting like you're Queen Shit, and better than everyone else."

Lauren stood up, fixing upon me her fiercest glare.

"You think that you can prance in here, all cutesy and take over this group. Well, you can't."

"Guys, stop." Angela said weakly. "Lauren..." But out of the corner of my eye, I saw that everyone else sat, transfixed on the unfolding of this.

"You're a stupid little hussy who came over from that poor, out of the way, dinky little reservation, where they've got absolutely no morals and breed like they're dying out."

"They are dying out, there's not a lot of them left." I growled.

"Looks like you don't have any morals either, letting Edward come onto you like that, when you've got a boyfriend you obviously don't care about." My fists tightened subconsciously.

"You don't know anything about Jake and I." I growled.

"I think I might. You think you've got him wrapped around your finger, like he's hanging off you. But, he is way too good for you. You. Don't. Deserve. Him."

"You think you do?" I asked back, gritting my teeth. "You're nothing but a self-conscious bully who tries to make herself look better by putting others down, you're nothing."

"And your father." She continued, not listening. "Coming in here and taking Chief of Police away from my dad. He's just a stupid, lonely coward who's not looking for any excitement. He's lazy and probably has no morals like you." That did it.

"Fuck you." I said, before walking towards her, fist pulled back. I saw the fear and recognition in her eyes a second before I extended my fist out and smashed it right to the centre of her face, the force of my whole body behind it. A bone crunched sickeningly, and she fell to the ground, bloody and crying. "Don't say shit about my father, or Jake or the reservation.

"Bella!" Mr. Banner came over to see what the fuss was about. "Oh my God, is she okay?" He asked upon seeing Lauren hysterical on the ground. Nobody answered. "What have you done?" He asked quizzically.

"The bitch punched me in the face!" Lauren screamed, her words garbled by blood.

"Principal's office, Bella Swan." Mr. Banner looked at me behind his wire-frame glasses, trying to look tough, but I saw a hint of a smile on his face. He was secretly glad, because he had also been a victim of Lauren's torment.

Coach Clapp came and escorted me to the waiting area. I sat for a long time while they got Lauren's situation straightened out and got her into the Nurse's office.

"Come in." The Principal said, beckoning me as he went inside. He sat down behind the huge desk and gestured for me to sit down on the opposite side. "Now, from what I understand, you punched Lauren Conrad in the face, breaking her nose." He looked at me from under his eyebrows, what I guessed was supposed to be threatening.

"She instigated." I replied.

"She said that you started the whole thing."

"She's a bitch."

"Language, Ms. Swan."

"She brought this on herself. She can't insult my father, my boyfriend and my roots without getting something in return. I think that's under bullying, and **I **think I understand that's a zero tolerance issue?"

"That may be, and we will look into that. But this matter takes precedence, of course. I don't want others getting the idea that nothing will come of it if they do the same thing." For some reason, I felt like I could try to stand up to this guy. For my first time in the Principals office, I wasn't scared at all.

"I think you're looking at this the wrong way." I protested.

"We also have a zero tolerance policy on fighting. You will be suspended for fighting, a week. We will see to Ms. Conrad's bullying issue when it is seen that she is okay."

"Well, thanks I guess." I said, standing up.

"Know that the next time you are caught for fighting on school grounds, you will be expelled."

"Wouldn't that be the zero tolerance policy for first time?" I asked, looking him in the eye.

"It would be, but you have a clean record, and you're one of the brightest students in the school. Let's see that this is an isolated issue, and it never happens again and all will be okay. Your punishment starts today. You will get the paper from Ms. Cope and go home."

"See you later."

"See you Monday." He said before I shut the door. I stood at Ms. Cope's desk while she filled out the paper for Charlie to sign. She looked at me, concerned as she handed me the paper. I took it and left without a further word.

I got into my truck with no one around, possibly because they were all in class. I drove home with barely a thought in my head, not believing that I punched Lauren, or that I got expelled for punching Lauren.

"Dad!" I said, throwing open the door and throwing my keys on the stand by the door. "I-"

But I stopped, because not Dad, but a woman came out of the kitchen and walked toward me in the hallway. She had shoulder length brown hair, wide, innocent blue eyes and laugh lines on her face. She looked like someone, but I couldn't put my finger on it.

"Hi Bella, it's been so long." She smiled at me, her eyes crinkling. Then it hit me. She looked like an older me.

"M-om?" I asked, looking at this woman, this stranger who walked out of my life.

"Oh I knew you couldn't forget your own mother!" She cried, and closed the distance between us, wrapping her arms around me into a tight hug. I patted her back awkwardly as she squeezed me, her holding on for minutes too long for me.

I tried pulling back, but she pulled me in tighter. When she finally let me go, I backed up several steps so that she wouldn't get the idea to hug me again.

"Dad?" I called out nervously. I slipped past Renee and ran into the kitchen, where Dad sat at the table drinking a beer. "What's happening?"

"Seems your mom's come back." He said shortly, taking a long drink.

"Why?" I asked as she came into the kitchen. She sat down across from Charlie, patting the chair between them. I sat, slowly, looking between both of my parents warily. Renee smiled at me warmly, but Charlie kept his eyes fixed on the window over the sink.

"Bella, over the past few years I've started to regret how I left you here in Forks, and not getting to see you grow up. I see that you've grown into a wonderful young woman." She started, I folded the suspension paper quickly and put it into my back pocket, but looked back up at Renee with a retort quick on my lips.

"Over the past few years?" I asked, my tone rising a couple decibels. "Past few years? You left when I was six! That's a little more than a few years Renee." I spat her name back at her. Her eyes widened a small amount, but the smile stayed on her face.

"I know, but your father loved this part of the world, and didn't want to leave. We had different views, and I thought that it would be better for you to have some stability while I tried to figure myself out. I'd never had the chance as your father and I married straight out of high school." She said, but cheerfully. Like it was merely fact what had happened. "Of course I'd never blame it on him." She gave Dad a smile, but he wasn't looking at her.

"And?" I asked, narrowing my eyes at her.

"Well, I've found a job that I love and settled down with a great man." She said happily.

"Good for you." I replied, "What of it?"

"Well, I feel terrible that you had to grow up without a mother..."

"I think I've turned out just fine." I cut her off.

"Yes, of course you have." She affirmed with a nod. "But I've missed you terribly these years, and I want you to know that I love you very much. I wouldn't have left if I had known that you wouldn't be so well off. I couldn't tear you away from your life." She continued. "But what I wanted to get on to, the reason why I'm back, is that I want you to come live with me." Her face broke out into a grin.

"She wants you to live with her." Dad said softly. My breath caught in my throat as I listened to her next words with my teeth gritted.

"I've found a beautiful house in Phoenix, with my husband Phil. He's definitely okay with you coming up. I want you to get out of Forks and see the world. Phoenix is hot and dry, nothing like this rainy and damp place. It's beautiful there, I'd think you'd love it."

Visions of laying out in the hot sun, getting a tan and swimming in the ocean where it was warm, and not having to wear sweaters flashed through my head. It did sound very appealing.

"I'm going to think on it." I choked out, and left the kitchen, running upstairs to my room.


	25. Unabashed

So. Much. Thinking.

I had recently acquired quite a bit to think about. What had happened to my previously quiet, happy life? A lot, and it didn't look like there was going to be a change back. I had the thoughts of Jake to mull over, and now the prospect that my Mother had just given me. I hadn't even told Charlie that I was suspended yet. I wondered how he'd take it, considering the recent turn of events today. Did I want to move in with Renee? I barely knew the woman.

Repressed rage fired up at the thought of how she had left Dad and I to go frolic and have her own life, not tied down to anything. How could she leave her only daughter? At the same time, Phoenix sounded gorgeous, and the prospect of having a motherly figure in my life made it sound so nice. I wanted it at that moment.

I heard the door open downstairs and a gruff voice speaking. I heard Charlie's respond and footsteps up the door. My door swung open, and before my eyes could register, Jake was on his knees by at my feet.

"Bella, I heard when I was going to come in. It can't be true though. You wouldn't, would you?" Jake pleaded, his eyes sad.

"Jake...what?" I asked as he took my hands in his.

"You can't go. I mean, if you did go, I'd go with you. But I don't want you to go." He said. His eyes seemed to be shining with unshed tears.

"I don't understand what you're talking about." I replied, confused.

"Phoenix. You can't." He said, and wrapped his arms around me. Oh, he had...heard? _The wolf hearing_, something said. My stomach dropped.

"Phoenix." I whispered.

"Are you going?" He tilted his head to look up at me.

"No." I replied, and with that it was decided. I didn't have to think on it, I had a perfect life here. In Forks. I wouldn't want to mess that up to go spend time with someone who walked out on me years ago. Jake let out a long breath of air.

"Thank God." He said under his breath. "But maybe you should tell your mom. I think she's got Charlie convinced that you're leaving today.

"I guess I should." I replied, sighing. I got up and walked downstairs, Jake on my heels. I realized that I had only been up there for about half an hour, but it turned out, all I'd needed was to see the loss in Jake's face to know whether or not I'd stay.

When I arrived in the kitchen, Renee was talking at Charlie, excited and chatty, while Charlie was slumped in his chair looking defeated. They both looked up when I arrived, Renee's face excited, while Charlie's sad.

"Bella!" Renee bubbled. "I was just telling your dad about the beautiful landscape and dryness of Phoenix. He knows you'll love it." Charlie cleared his throat at this, looking like that wasn't at all what he knew, and looked away, taking a huge swig out of his beer.

"Yeah, it's funny that you're still talking about that, because I-" I started.

"I know! You're going to love it there. You'll get a tan, and away from that pale skin." Renee cut me off. "We have the cutest little house, and you'll have more of a chance to meet real people at the big high school out there. The crime rate is pretty low, and I know you wouldn't get into trouble. We'd go to the beach every day!"

"Yeah, that sounds great, but I-" I tried to say again.

"I knew you'd be more than happy to come with me, and get away from this small dinky town, and into a new life." Renee kept prattling on about how great Phoenix was, and the same anger that made me punch Lauren flared up again, she was talking about my roots again. I narrowed my eyes at her.

"Excuse me Renee, if I may. Bella actually has something she wants to say." Jacob's voice rang out, deeper than usual and demanding power. Renee stopped in her tracks and stared a Jake, and it was then I realized, looking back at Jake as well, that to someone who didn't know him, he looked _dangerous_. I almost laughed out loud at the thought, but the way his stance was stopped me. He was almost crouched around me, his deep brown eyes dark and his muscles tense. I put a hand up at them to soften his anger.

"Jacob Black, it's been years. How have you been?" Renee asked, appraising Jake. "My, you've grown into quite the young man, Sarah and Billy must be some proud."

Jake visibly flinched at the mention of his mother, and I wanted to kick Renee. It was something that we just didn't talk about, and Renee should have known that. Of course she didn't though, she hasn't been around.

"Thank you." Jake said through clenched teeth. "Now if you'll listen to Bella." Jake poked my the small of my back with a big finger.

"Renee, it's not that all of that doesn't sound nice, it's just that Forks is home." I started, but once again Renee cut me off.

"Oh I know you love Forks, honey. But you can start a new life in Phoenix, I can guarantee that you'll love it, a better home..."

"Renee." Jake growled. Renee stopped and stared up a Jake, as he probably looked ferocious by this point.

"I want to stay in Forks. I'm nearing the end of school, and I don't want to start somewhere new. I just made a move to Forks, I don't want to go anywhere farther from the Reservation." I finally got out. I let out a sigh of relief that she didn't interrupt me again. I didn't think Jake could handle his temper with that. Charlie looked visibly relieved as well, and I thought I saw a hint of a smile.

"But Bella, it would be a better life, and you'd be with me, don't you want to spend time with your own mother? How could you do that?" Renee pulled her eyebrows up into a forlorn expression. I couldn't believe that she actually had the audacity to go there.

"Are you kidding me Renee?" I asked incredulously. "I can't believe that you'd leave a small child, alone and motherless and not show up until yeeeeaaarss later to give her guilt about not going to somewhere new to live with you when she has made a life here." I was almost yelling, and my hands were flailing uselessly. Jake tried to put a hand on my shoulder reassuringly.

"Well, Bella. I'll just leave you a little while to think about it. I'm staying in the motel on the other side of town, so I'll come back after you've thought it completely through and we'll talk about it further." Renee clasped her hands together, looking at me fondly, even though she had no right to do so. She stepped forward and gave me an awkward kiss on the forehead before saying goodbye to everyone and leaving.

Charlie sighed and sagged down further into his seat. Jake and I sat down at the table with him. I dropped my head into my hand and looked at Charlie.

"Boy, will you grab me another beer out of the fridge?" Charlie asked Jake, pointing to the refrigerator. Jake got up easily, loping over to the fridge and opened it, grabbing two beers out, and sitting back down. He cracked one open and raised it to his mouth before Charlie grabbed it.

"Thanks for opening it for me." Charlie said, taking a drink. They both chuckled.

"Chief I was thinking I could have one." Jake joked, Charlie grabbed the other one, pulling it towards him.

"I don't think so minor." He grinned.

"So what's with?" I asked, causing Charlie to put his beer back on the table.

"What?" Charlie asked absently.

"Why was Renee here?" I asked.

"Obviously to try to coerce you into moving out of here and in with her." Charlie replied, shrugging. I sank back into my seat, suddenly remembering the note in my back pocket, and figuring I should show Charlie, I pulled it out. After the stress of that attack by Renee, this should be a good time to show him.

"Here. This is for you." I said, heaving the note at him.

"What...?" Charlie asked, unfolding it and reading it. Once he finished, he looked up at me, eyebrows raised. "You got suspended for a week out of school...? For punching a girl in the face?"

"Bells." Jake whistled.

"Dad, you have to..." Now he was the one cutting me off.

"Bella, you can't go around thinking that you can just punch girls in the face. This is terrible behaviour for a daughter of the Chief of Police! How do you think this is going to look on me? It's going to look like I can't raise you, or didn't do a good enough job alone." Charlie's voice got very low as he said this. "I'm so disappointed."

"You don't understand Dad." I mumbled, looking at him.

"What don't I understand? You punched a girl in the face, at lunch time. Did I raise you to be a fighter? Did I do something wrong? I thought I told you hitting people was a bad thing to do! Why did you do it?"

"Dad!" I raised my voice exasperatedly. All the stress of today was really getting to me. "I couldn't just sit there and let her make fun of the Reservation, me, Jake, or you! What, did you expect me to lay down and take her bullying further?" Charlie didn't reply, his eyebrows were hidden under the wisps of hair covering his forehead, his eyes wide.

"You were...defending me?" He asked, his eyes crinkling.

"Yes. I couldn't just have her doing that. That's why I got suspended." I replied. I hadn't realized that I had stood back up, I sat back down in my chair slowly.

"That sounds like a legitimate reason. I'm sorry I freaked out. I just never thought that anything like this would happen raising you." His eyes were still wide with surprise. "I'm not going to ground you for something that she deserved. But I expect that this will never happen again. If it does, take it to the administration."

"It won't happen again Dad." I said, shaking my head and looking down at my lap.

"Chief," Jake said after a few moments, very softly. "Would it be okay if I took Bella down to La Push?" I looked up, trying to catch Jake's eye questioningly, but he was looking at Dad.

"Yes, you kids go have fun." He said tiredly, waving us away. Jake took my hand and started leading me to the door.

"Bella." Charlie called quietly just as we reached the doorway.

"Yeah Dad?" I replied, turning and looking at him.

"Thank you." He mouthed. I nodded, smiling at him before turning and leaving with Jake.


	26. Trepidation

Jake let me drive, sitting absently in the passenger seat looking out the window. Happiness wasn't radiating off him as it usually was; he actually seemed kind of down. I reached across the seat, brushing my fingers across his leg. He looked over, giving me a tight smile.

"Jake, what's wrong?" I asked, raising my eyebrows at him. He didn't look at me, just kept his eyes trained outside. "...Jake?"

He glanced over, fixing me with the intense power of his deep brown eyes. I took an involuntary breath in.

"I was thinking about how hard it would be if I lost you." He said, his voice husky. He cast his eyes down at the seat.

"Jake." I said firmly. "You're not going to lose me. I'm far too much in love with you to even think about it."

"What if your mom convinces you to go with her to Phoenix?" He whispered.

"She won't. Jacob. I thought you knew me better than that." Our hands reached out at the same time and entwined with each other.

"I do." He choked out, sounding like he was going to cry.

"Don't you think I would have already left after all the..." I swallowed nervously. "stuff that has happened

"You were a little weirded out by it." He countered.

"A little, I guess. But I just needed some time to think about it. But I'm okay with it. I mean, I'm not going to leave you over it."

"Really?" Jake asked, for the first time in his life showing any kind of insecurity.

"Because even if I did, you wouldn't allow it, would you?" I teased, squeezing his hand. He chuckled.

"I couldn't let it happen." He agreed, nodding.

I pulled into Jake's driveway still reeling from Jake's moment of lacking confidence. and turned off the truck, only to be greeted by Quil, Embry and Bina. They stood up as we got out of the truck.

"Bella! Bella! Bella!" Bina hopped over to me, squeezing me up into a hug.

"What are you doing with her?" I mouthed at Quil, who shrugged his shoulders and pointed to Embry, who stood with a shit-eating grin on his face. Bina let go of me and went back to stand between Quil and Embry. Embry looked down at her tenderly.

"It's Embry, isn't it." I turned and whispered at Jake. He nodded grimly, sticking his hands in his pockets.

"Hey guys, what's up?" I asked, smiling at them.

"What's up is that I haven't seen you for like, ten years!" Bina squealed. "So much has been going on!"

"Yeah, I'd say." I agreed, turning into Jake. "Does she know?" I whispered. He bent down to kiss me on top of my head.

"No." He murmured. "And for good reason too. How do you think she'd react?"

"So, what's on the agenda for today?" Quil asked, clapping his hands together, probably to gain our attention. I looked at him, narrowing my eyes. He had most likely heard all of mine and Jake's conversation, as well as Embry. He looked at me guiltily, as if he was trying to tell me what was going on with his eyes. He was saying that he couldn't stay away from her as Jake couldn't stay away from me. I wondered if he had imprinted on her, and looked up at Jake again questioningly, trying to make sense of the whole situation. He looked back, question in his eyes about what was on my mind. Unfortunately, Embry interrupted before I could open my mouth.

"We're about to head back to Bina's. We were waiting for you guys to come back to see if you wanted to come with." He asked, looking between us. Jake looked down at me, putting an arm around my waist.

"Actually, Bella and I were going to spend a couple minutes alone before we went anywhere." Jake replied. Quil waggled his eyebrows at the both of us.

"You guys have fun." He smiled, and brought Embry and Bina along with him down the road, and Jake and I went into the house, sitting down on his bed.

"Has Embry imprinted on Bina?" The question tumbled out of my mouth before I had the chance to stop it, the curiosity was killing me. Jake chuckled, pulling me into his arms.

"No." He said, kissing me on the cheek. "Not even. Unless you want to called being so whipped she tells you if you can breathe an imprint." He chuckled again. I turned around so that I was facing him.

"What does it feel like?" I asked, looking into his deeply affectionate eyes.

"It's beautiful, it's like being tied to only you in the best of ways." He stopped, to look for words. "It's love, but so much deeper. It's more than words."

"I've never seen you so poetic." I giggled. He tilted my chin up and pressed his soft lips against mine. It was soft and sweet, and made me swoon, almost losing my breath. I could feel my face flush as he leaned back and looked down at me.

"I'm so sorry I wasted all that time away from you, avoiding you because Sam said so. I feel so terrible for it." Jake lowered his long lashes to the bed.

"It's okay Jakie. Everything is better now." I affirmed. He looked at me happily.

"You know that you're my soulmate, right? We're supposed to be a perfect match for each other." His arms circled around my waist softly.

"We are a perfect match for each other Jake, we knew that years ago." I smiled up at him, but the words hit me in a way that I couldn't even describe. I grabbed his hand and drug him to his bedroom, attacking him with my lips as soon as his bedroom door was closed. He bent his head down to meet my lips and I eagerly reached upwards, kissing his neck, sucking, biting. He let out a contented sigh, and ran his hands down my sides. When I nibbled on his ear, he groaned and picked me up, and tossed me onto his bed, following not even a second afterwards. I wrapped my legs around his waist and pulled his face down to mine. His lips were soft and warm, opening up to allow our tongues to meet, dancing their familiar dance. He kept his hand planted on my waist, the other on the bed, respecting me. I leaned back to look at him.

"Jake, I want you…" I started, looking into his dark eyes. Before I could finish, his hand covered my mouth.

"I know what you're going to say, but please don't Bella. Please." He said, closing his eyes. His forehead wrinkled in thought. He removed the hand from my mouth. His face was dusted with a light flush, probably from the proximity of us.

"Jake, I want to though." I replied, dropping my legs.

"No." Was his response. He shook his head, eyes still closed. I wasn't going to listen to him, I wanted him badly.

"Jake, I need you to touch me." I whispered, my voice rushed. His eyes snapped open at that, impossibly wide as he looked at me.

"I don't know if I can." He replied, still looking at me.

"Can't you just try?" I asked, trying to pull his body to me. He was rigid, unmoving. I wrapped my legs around him again and pulled my lower half up so that it grinded against his. "I know you want it as much as I do." He sat back on his heels, his eyebrows knit together on his forehead. I stared at him, looking at how his now cropped hair made the features on his face stand out. His defined jaw line was at front and centre, his dark eyes and high cheekbones. He was glorious, and after all this time, it was still hard to believe he was mine.

"I can't." He said, hurt in his voice.

"But don't you feel the pull towards it? The need, compulsion?" I asked desperately, trying to find the teenage boy behind his old eyes. "Jake, don't you want me?"

"I do Bella, oh God, I do." He blurted, and then lay down beside me. "But I don't know if I'll be able to control myself. I need advice."

I stared at him in wonder. He had to talk to Sam about it. I blushed at the thought of Jake talking about taking me to Sam, him knowing all the details of our private life.

"Kids, I hate to interrupt." Billy called, opening the door and wheeling in. "Old Quil wants you to drop into his house, he says you guys have to have this conversation with him immediately."

"What about?" Jake asked, sitting up and looking at Billy.

"I don't know son, all I know is that it's important." Billy tipped his hat at me, and wheeled back out. I turned to Jake, raising my eyebrows. He shrugged.

"I have no idea what it will be about. " Jake looked as confused as I felt.

"So it could be about anything. I'm a little worried." I said, sitting up.

"We should go and get it over with." Jake said as he got up. He pulled me up with him. "We can take a walk, Old Quil's house isn't very far from here." He smiled, grabbing my hand.

"Where exactly is it?" I asked, looking up at Jake.

"Other side of town." Jake replied, and I saw a smile playing at his lips.

"Jake, you're always making me walk." I dramatically sighed.

"Hey, it's a part of living here." Jake shook his head at me.

"I don't live here anymore." I replied. He finally looked down at me.

"But you do." He said, raising an eyebrow at me. I giggled.

"Yeah, I do." I accepted and looked ahead, preparing myself for the walk ahead.

We walked for a while, completely bypassing the busier part of town, and onto a dirt road.

"Does anyone take care of this part?" I asked, looking around at the overgrown forest that was sweeping the road.

"They don't feel the need to cut back the trees until they absolutely can't get through." Jake said, looking around as well. "Quil lives back here too."

It hit me that I had never really been to Quil's house, or even seen it. This was my first time back this way. Jake suddenly turned into a driveway, dragging me with him. It was almost hidden by trees from the outside, but once we got inside, it held an expansive lawn, cleanly mowed, with flower beds around the trees that grew. The shack could have used some work, the white paint was peeling and the whole house was kind of sagging, but it was quaint and comfortable looking.

"Come children," came the ancient voice. Old Quil came hobbling out from behind the back of the house, and gestured us inside. "Come inside, make yourselves comfortable. I looked at Jake, expecting him to take over. He shrugged and started walking forward.


	27. Arcane

Old Quil excused himself to the kitchen as we sat down on the quilt covered couch in the living room. I stared at Jake, willing him to look at me, but he was staring off into a corner of the house.

"Jake," I whispered. He turned towards me. "What is this about?" I looked at him, hoping he had an answer. Old Quil sounded like he was banging pots and pans around in the kitchen and had no intention of coming out soon.

"I don't know." He whispered back. "Wolf stuff? This is the first time I've ever been called to talk with Old Quil." His eyes were as confused as mine were as he glanced over to the door separating the kitchen and living room.

Old Quil came through the door like a young man, stopping and clearing his throat. Jake and I turned around to see him standing there with his hands on his hips.

"Would either of you like some tea? Coffee?" He asked, his voice rough.

"No thank you." I said quickly as Jake nudged me.

"I'll have some tea, thank you." Jake said, nodding. Old Quil hummed and turned back into the kitchen.

"Why are you making him do more work than necessary?" I hissed at Jake. His eyes old, he looked down at me.

"Have you forgotten that it's custom to accept coffee or tea when you make a visit to someone and they offer?" He replied, shaking his head. "I can't believe you've forgotten that.

"When did I ever learn that?" My voice went up a few octaves with how confused I was.

"It's a part of growing up here!" Jake whispered back.

"Tea." Old Quil came bustling back into the living room and set a tray on the coffee table. "Sugar is there." He took his cup and sat down in the chair facing the couch. It then felt like an interview, and I could feel myself sweating. Jake took a loud sip of his tea and smiled.

"That's good stuff, thanks Mr. Ateara."

"You're very welcome young man." Old Quil smiled. His head swivelled to look at me. "Young lady, I made a cup of tea for you as well." He leaned forward and nudged a cup at me.

"Oh, thank you Mr. Ataera." I said, lunging forward and grabbing it, almost spilling the liquid all over his clean coffee table. I felt my cheeks flush with embarrassment and I kept my head down as I spooned three heaping tablespoons of sugar into it.

"My pleasure." His cheeks lifted into a sunny grin.

"Be careful." Jake whispered, nudging an elbow into me.

"Sorry." I whispered back.

"So, Mr. Ateara..Dad said that you wanted us here to talk to us?" Jake said, straightening up and turning to Quil.

"Yes, I called and asked him if he could send you two over. Don't worry about anything, but I did have almost this same chat with Sam and Emily." He stopped to clear his throat, and then turned his coal black eyes on me. "I know that there was a period between the time that Jake changed and he imprinted that he did not see you Bella, but forgive me, that is my fault."

"I don't blame anyone…" I started, but he held up a hand to stop me.

"Sam and I had a conversation soon after Jake changed about the relationship between the two of you, and what it could blossom into. Of course you're familiar with Taha Aki and the story behind that. The wolf tribe that was created after that involved the Atearas, the Blacks and the Uleys, but a special trait has been passed down, whether or not we phase. The Atearas were given it as a bonus to being able to phase, as gift from the ruler, and we develop it when we come of age. In fact: Quil should be starting to develop it now. I can see the connections between people, especially in relationships. Your bond is glowing now, as it should be, but before Jake phased, your bond was tricky." He paused, probably for effect, and to let the words sink in.

"I'm sorry, tricky, sir?" Jake asked, confused. His hand instinctively reached for me.

"It was wavering for a while, unsure. I didn't know what would happen if you met her eyes and imprinted as the connection said you would. I thought it might be disastrous. So I made Sam give you an alpha command not to meet her eyes until I was sure what was happening between the two of you. I'm so sorry for the pain that I caused either of you."

"You can see who people are going to imprint on?" I blurted out without thinking. I closed my mouth quickly, feeling the blood rush into my cheeks.

"Yes, I can. It takes all the fun out of relationships, doesn't it?" He gave a dry chuckle. "I am forbidden, however to tell anyone anything about their imprinting, I had to swear on an old blood oath."

"And if you do…?" Jake asked slowly.

"I die; it's as simple as that. I don't think I'm ready for that yet." Old Quil said.

"Wow."

"Wow indeed. Anyway, after clearing that entire mess up, I have another matter that we must discuss." Old Quil sat forward and looked at the two of us in turn. "I can see that you have not consummated your relationship yet." I felt myself blush, yet again. Sam was bad enough, now this old man? "And I have to warn the two of you." Old Quil stopped for dramatic effect again. He took in a few deep breaths not in the least unsettled by the topic of conversation. I looked up at Jake, who was staring at Old Quil with rapt attention, his mouth hanging slightly open.

"Warn us what?" I asked, to get the ball rolling again. Jake's fists were clenched in anticipation.

"You cannot consummate your relationship until the two of you discuss a particular event which happened that caused a rift. Feelings must be sorted out, and I know one of you is subconsciously bothered by this event. Also, imprints and imprintees do not keep anything from each other, they are supposed to tell each other everything. This is a large secret." Old Quil said. The two of us sat there, dumbfounded. Jake was the first to gather his bearings.

"What is it that we're supposed to talk about?" He asked, his voice filled with both worry and awe.

"That, I also cannot tell you, as I don't know myself." He smiled. "Not to sound like a cliché, but you must figure it out for yourself. Then, and only then will your relationship reach its full potential."

"I don't know if I understand fully." I leaned forward, looking at Old Quil.

"Kids, as much as there is a pull towards it, like you feel like you must be together fully, do not. Do not until you have it figured out, or something can go terribly wrong. It can sometimes go as far as breaking the imprint."

We were silent as we processed this information. There was always something stopping us from doing what we tried lately, and now this added to the list. I frowned, looking over at Jake.

"What I'm worried about, sir, is losing control and phasing near her if I get too…er, excited. I don't want to hurt Bella." Jake looked down at the floor as he said it. I saw the furrow in his eyebrows. Old Quil was silent for a couple moments, then let out a big laugh. We waited while he laughed about the situation, and finally, wiping tears from his eyes he looked back at us.

"You won't phase from being too 'excited'." He made the finger quotations. "You're perfectly okay." Jake let out a sigh of relief.

"I was so worried about that." Jake ran a hand through his short hair. "Is that all you wanted to talk to us about?"

"Is that all? It's some pretty heavy topic matter. Don't be afraid to come back to talk to me once you have it figured out." Old Quil replied. He stood up. Jake followed suit, dragging me up with him.

"Thank you for your time Mr. Ateara, and the tea was delicious." Jake shook his hand. "Is there anything we can help you with? The cups or anything?"

"No, no, Jacob. I'm still a young man yet." Old Quil let out another booming laugh. He walked over to the door and opened it for us.

"We will be back." Jake nodded, walking after him.

"I know you will. I also must insist that, if you think of actually consummating your relationship, get married first. I know times have changed, but I haven't. My views are the same.

"I will take that into consideration, sir." Jake said as he walked out the door, his hand gripping mine. I managed a small 'thank you' and waved as we walked off the property. Jake then started walking fast, his long legs carrying him about a step and a half in more in front of me with each step he took. I could barely keep up with him running. I kept quiet; agitation and confusion were written on his face. He was in deep thought. At some point decided that I wasn't walking fast enough, and swung me up on his back, much to my protests. He motored through town, coming to his house, where he walked into his bedroom, setting me down on the bed.

"We need to figure out what Old Quil is talking about." He said, his eyes hard as he looked out his window. "Because now that I know about whether or not I'll phase, all I want to do is…" He gripped my face in his hand and roughly pressed his lips up against mine. I responded instantly, wrapping my arms around him. He pulled back, and looked at me thoughtfully.

"I wonder what it could be that we need to figure out." He said, looking into my eyes.

"I know we'll figure it out, but I have absolutely no idea." I replied, trying to find his lips again.

"I know that I haven't done anything though, nothing to hurt you. I wouldn't, ever." He placed a large hard on my shoulder and put his head down, closing his eyes.

"I know, and I haven't either." I said. He looked back up at me.

"What could it possibly be then?" He frowned.


	28. Aphrodisia

I excused myself from Jake's house by telling him that I was tired. He let me go, on the condition that I would let him come over later that night. I promised that my window would be unlocked and that I didn't know if I'd be sleeping or not. In truth, I was getting tired of him being stuck on trying to decipher what Old Quil said. I didn't know, and I didn't want to frustrate myself with trying to figure it out.

I was at home now, and since I was here, I figured I'd go to sleep. I would be able to sleep in because of my suspension from school, which made me happy. I hadn't really had the opportunity in my life to be able to sleep in, because I had been always on the go. Since we moved into Forks and away from La Push, I had found myself with a lot of free time, not being around all of my friends constantly. In the past, one or more of them would be jumping on my bed, trying to get me to wake up to do whatever they decided the day possessed. Usually it was Jake, a lot of the time Bina, sometimes Embry, and more often than I expected: Quil.

I made myself a sandwich, ate it in silence and headed upstairs, stripping down to my underwear. I threw on a sports bra and crawled under my cool sheets to, preferably go to sleep, or wait for Jake to finish his patrol of the Reservation. Sooner or later he would make the loop around to my house and open my window and come in. I entertained myself with the thoughts of what he could do if he did come in. Then I stopped myself. Sure, these were normal teenage thoughts, I didn't remember when it had happened, but all of a sudden sex was all that was on my mind. What was happening to me?

I decided to ignore the more rational part of my mind; it wouldn't hurt to fantasize for at least one night, and I trained my thoughts back at Jake coming in my window, shirtless. He was dressed only in a pair of cut off jean shorts. His muscled body rippled as he walked over to my bed and took my face in his hands. He then started kissing me, moving his strong warm body over mine, pressing into me.

I heard my window slide open, much noisier than I wanted it to be, and I knew that Jake was here. I had my back to the window as he came in, so I couldn't see what he was wearing. I didn't hear him move after he stepped in the window, and I slowly moved my hand down to give myself a feel. Oh my god, did he smell how aroused I was? Shit shit shit..What did he think of me?

Suddenly the blanket behind me was lifted and I felt Jake crawl into the bed beside me. My bed was so small, and Jake so big that there was no way that he would get all of himself onto that bed without touching most of my body.

"Holy shit." I heard him mutter. He must have smelled me, or seen, or felt what I was wearing under here. I couldn't tell by just his tone whether it was good or bad, but I hoped it to be good. I had decided, somewhere and somehow that innocent Bella was gone, and a different Bella who wanted Jake in a more than friends-who-decided-to-date way. I was determined to make Jake give it to me.

I knew he was lying the same way I was, maybe trying not to touch me, so I decided to just push my back into him, slowly. I wanted to make it seem like it was a sleeping move, not a conscious, 'I want to rip the clothes off your body and ravish you kind of way.' When I reached him, I received a surprise myself. Something in his pants was pressing into my back, something big and hard. Oh hell, that was a good 'holy shit'; a very good one. He was pleased with what he saw: or something else definitely was.

"Jake." I moaned, still pretending to be asleep, trying to keep my breathing to sound that of a sleeping person.

"Oh Bella." Jake buried his face into my hair and took a deep breath in. I could almost feel his heated internal battle with responsible Jake and teenage boy Jake. Then he started muttering again, the same argument he'd been having with himself all day. "I wonder what it was that Quil was talking about. I so wish I could figure it out. I just want to have a normal relationship with you, Bells."

I turned around and opened my eyes. Jake's own widened in surprise as I studied his face.

"I didn't know you were awake." He stuttered.

"A normal relationship, Jake? Do you mean one that's filled with lust, and being able to act upon it?" I asked him. He nodded slowly, keeping his eyes on mine.

"I want to Bella, understand that. But I need to figure out what it is that Old Quil was talking about so that the imprint can be finalized. I never want to deny you anything."

Then his mouth was on mine. This wasn't a simple brush of the lips or a light-hearted kiss, it was emotional, raw and passionate. I heard a growl erupt from deep within his throat, rumbling between us as he moved so that he was on top of me, resting his weight on an elbow, nestling his lower half in between my legs. It was clear that he was affirming that he was in control, and I was more than happy to oblige. It was a great feeling, having almost every part of his body touching mine. He was kissing me with such intensity that I didn't know if he knew how much emotion he was pouring out between our lips.

As quick as it happened, he pulled back, looking at me, his eyes dark.

"I need you to know," his voice was ragged "that I love you. I also need you to know that I need you." He traced his finger lazily along my side, giving me delicious shivers.

"I need you too, Jake." I grabbed the fabric of his shirt, pulling his face to mine. "Now, it feels, more than I ever have. Please."

He placed a hand over my mouth.

"Don't beg me Bella. You know how I feel about it, with the new information more than ever." He said to me. I removed the hand and sought his lips with my own again. His responded eagerly, his hand moving to cup my face. After a while, he pulled away, apologizing with soft kisses all over my face. He rolled over, curling me up into his arms.

"Bella," he said in a low voice "there was something Quil said to me before we left…"

"What was it?" I said sleepily, the warmth surrounding me making my eyes droop.

"It was…" He paused, and I turned to look up at his face. His eyes glazed over as he remembered and he seemed to chant what Quil said. "The lust that you feel after that imprint, the lust that both of you feel will be almost overwhelming. It is because of the need to consummate your relationship to make the imprint whole. I suspect that Bella is feeling this also, as much as you are Jacob. It will be almost strange for how much you will feel that you want each other because I'm aware of how your relationship hasn't been physical before. You need not to let it overcome your mission to settle disputes, or you can shatter the imprint. As strong as an imprint may be, right now yours is a very delicate thing. Tread carefully."

I sat for a minute in shocked silence. It was true. Ever since he had met my eyes in the woods, I had felt something different than what I had been in our relationship before. I had felt the need to be as close to him as I could: a very physical feeling. I thought of his solid body in ways I hadn't, when our relationship had been more comforting than anything. It was why we had been pushing boundaries that we had carefully placed, so that we wouldn't cross those lines before we were ready.

"That's why." I whispered. "That's why I lust for you a lot more now."

"The start of an imprint is usually filled with an insatiable lust. In old tales, they would send the newly married imprint couple to a cabin in the woods for a couple weeks to let them work through how they feel, and to 'get it out of their system'." He grinned as he looked down at me. "Of course, it was rare, but they knew anyway. It was part of the honeymoon period."

"Does that mean that it's not a real want for you that I'm feeling?" I asked, worried now.

"Of course it's a real want. It's just amplified right now." Jake looked wise beyond his years as he spoke. I laid my head down on his chest to think about what he had just said, but instead of thinking, bundled in his warmth; I fell asleep almost instantly.

I awoke to the sound of my alarm going off. Groggily, I got up and shut it off, noting that Jake was no longer in my room with me. I showered and went through all the motions of getting ready for school, grabbing my school bag and heading out to the truck.

As I pulled in the parking lot, it hit me. I realized that I had been suspended for a week, and I had just gotten ready for nothing. I stopped the truck and laughed at myself, looking around the parking lot. As early as I was here, it was crowded with people already, heading into the school. As my eyes swept over a silver Volvo, a rush of cold washed over me.

Edward Cullen was leaning against his car, staring straight at me. I could see the gold of his eyes from across the parking lot, boring into mine. Fumbling with the gear shift, I backed out of the parking lot and pulled into the parking lot of the library. With shaking hands I pulled out my phone and dialled Jake's number by heart.

"Hello?"

"Jake." I said, dread washing through me.

"What is it? Bells, what?" Jake asked, worry immediately lacing his voice.

"It's me. It's my fault." I said, taking a shaky breath in.

"Bella, you're scaring me. Explain please."

"The imprint, the problem. It's my fault." I managed.

"Your fault...How?"

"Edward, he…he kissed me." Tears started to roll down my face. "I'm so sorry Jake; it was a couple weeks ago. He kissed me, I don't know what happened, and I couldn't do anything to stop it."

"You're kidding me." Jake's voice hardened. "After all this time? Really? Nothing you could do to stop it?"

"No, I just couldn't push him away!"

"That attracted to him, huh? I knew he was trouble. Goddammit Bella." Jake said.

"I'm so sorry." I cried.

"You're sorry? Well, doesn't change anything. Sorry." He said, and I heard the angry slam of the receiver in my ear. All I could do was sit in the truck and sob for a long time. The thought of losing Jake brought back the feelings of when he first changed into a werewolf. It ached from the depth of my heart.

"Bella." An abrasive, musical voice said to my left. I looked over through my tears. The truck door was open, and through my watery vision I saw the golden eyes piercing into me.

"What do you want?" I spat at him.

"It's okay. I know what it feels like." He tried soothing me. I felt his cold hands on my arm, and then a sharp prick. As everything faded to black, his eyes were what were burned into my vision.


	29. Kidnapped

I woke up in a daze. Sitting up, I realized I was lying in a bed. It was a large four poster, easily queen size with a deep blue comforter covering me with the matching pillows. I followed a beam of sunlight that shone on the covers to a window, and gasped. The window was covered in dust, but that wasn't all there was to what I saw. What the bed was in was a dusty warehouse, with high ceilings and a cement floor. It was dank, and smelled musty. It was just light enough to see old machinery piled in the far corner, and desks piled in another, but that's all there was to the room I was in. The windows that were there were covered in a film of dirt, not allowing a lot of sunlight to get through.

It was then that my brain decided to be frightened and I pulled my knees up to my chin underneath the blanket. I tried to focus my foggy mind on something, on what had happened before I got here, and all I saw was the golden eyes in my vision.

"Hello? Is anybody there?" I called. My echo was the only answer I received. I flopped back down on my pillow, my shirt riding up. I felt something cold on my waist and my hands flew down to figure out what it was. A chain was tied tightly around the smallest part of my waist. Feeling around to my back, it was locked with a combination lock and hooked around the bed with another one. There was no way I was getting out of here.

"Oh good, you're awake." That voice said. I sat back up again and glared at him.

"Awake, but not happy." I growled. He smirked as he looked down at me.

"Unhappy? But look at this beautiful bed! We'll be spending lots of time in this thing, that's why I wanted it to be so great." He gestured grandly. "It has a certain appeal, don't you think?" I looked away from him. It had appeal, the kind where I wanted to pick it up and smash him over the head with it.

"Why did you bring me here?" I asked, looking back at him.

"Well, you brushed off my earlier attempts to be together. I figured it might be because of your boyfriend. Now that you're away from his influence, we can be together, of course."

"I don't want to be with you!" I yelled at him, my voice echoing off of the empty walls. His eyes darkened as he regarded me. I leaned backwards as he got onto the bed, kneeling over me.

"But Bella," His voice had taken on a soothing tone, a familiar tone "don't you want to be with me?"

I could only stare up at him, once my eyes had met his, I couldn't look away. I tried so hard, to only tear my eyes away for a second, but he had captured them. They were probing and persuasive, and almost beautiful.

"I-I do." My voice said, betraying me. Everything inside of me screamed 'NO' once more at him. Inside my head, I just wanted to punch him in the face.

"You can't keep resisting me for this long." His smooth voice said, he still kept his eyes trained on me.

"It was so hard to resist you." My voice was husky, suddenly filled with want. What was happening to me? On the inside, I was panicking. How could he have this much control over the outside of my body, when the inside of my body was fighting so hard against it. It was like being trapped in a shell that was doing everything you despised, but there was no way that you could stop it.

"Touch me." He commanded in his silky voice. His eyes darkened, flashing through with a golden colour before settling on the darker amber. His pupils dilated and contracted with his words. My hands, seemingly of their own accord reached out towards him, unbuttoning his dress shirt. They pulled the shirt towards his shoulders, revealing his pale chest. They placed themselves on his chest, running across his pectorals and down across his abs. My fingers whispered up his sides, feeling his ribcage and gripped his shoulders. All the while, he kept his eyes locked on my, not breaking eye contact, as I wasn't either. I saw his eyes tighten with want, or something. I knew that look, though, and it didn't seem very safe coming from his face. So what Mr. Edward Cullen wanted was special care from someone. Well, he sure did it in a creepy way, I was getting more grossed out by the second as my hands felt across his upper body, surprisingly muscled. I wanted to retch from the feel of his cold skin, like it was dead. It was very much like I was feeling a corpse right now.

It made me think back to Jake, so warm and so alive. That's what I loved about him, realizing now as I touched Edwards marble body. He was like a sun for me, something I couldn't get enough of. He was so loving and caring, always taking into account what I wanted, very much unlike the cold and calculating Edward. Looking into his eyes made me shiver at the malice that they held, and the deep maliciousness that radiated off him. He finally took his eyes off of me, looking down at my hands.

"Okay, that's enough." He said, buttoning his shirt back up. "Now I know how great your hands feel, we'll finish this later."

"Finish this later?" My mouth was finally connected to my brain again. "You asshole! I don't want to finish this later! I know you're doing something to me, something to make me touch you, or do whatever you say."

"That hurts, Bella." Edward said solemnly. "I brought you food, so that you can keep that body healthy for me." He was gone, and back in a flash, holding a TV dinner, complete with the brownie. I decided to ignore the way he put ownership on my body.

"That's hardly healthy eating." I spat at him, taking it. He merely looked at me.

"Eat it or not, that's not my problem." He shrugged. "I just want to take care of your well-being."

"Is it poisoned?" I asked, my stomach growling ferociously. I hadn't eaten this morning, and I didn't know what time it was now, but I guessed it was probably afternoon.

"I want you healthy. Not poisoned." He stated, putting his hands in his pockets. "Eat."

I did so, not because Edward told me to, but because I was very much hungry. He watched me the whole time, looking down to my food when I looked up at him. His eyes were a golden yellow again. I finished, ending with the delicious brownie and handed him my tray.

"I'm pleased to see you have an appetite" I saw a small smile cross his face.

"When you haven't eaten all day, you'd be hungry too." I said. "Speaking of, what time is it?"

"That doesn't matter." Edward shook his head. "Right now, I think, all that matters is you and I."

He walked over to me, kneeling on the bed. This was so wrong; this shouldn't be Edward leaning over me. I cringed away from him, closing my eyes. I was not going to get taken advantage of again.

"No need to cringe." He said, coming close. He ran his hand down the side of my face, his cool breath blowing over me. I accidentally breathed in. Big mistake. It was like honey and lilacs and sunshine. It was intoxicating. I took a hungry breath in, almost tasting it on my tongue.

"Open your eyes." He demanded. I did so without question, and his eyes locked on mine. _Oh shit. _His eyes flashed, and his pupils contracted, and my mind turned to mush. He was so close that all I was breathing in was the scent coming off of his skin. "Everything about me invites you in, my voice, my eyes, even my smell. Doesn't it?"

I nodded, drowning in sunshine. I gave him a small smile.

"Yes, I cannot resist you."

"It makes you want me, doesn't it?" He asked, smirking. I raised my hands to him and touched his abdomen through his shirt.

"I want you." I purred, staring at his golden eyes.

He started to lift my shirt up, running his hands across my stomach and lifting them to run down my neck, down my carotid artery. As one cupped my face, the other ran down my leg, squeezing in some places, and running his fingernails across my hamstrings. He hitched my leg up so that my knee was bent, and so that he could get closer to me. His eyes flashed a bright yellow, stunning me as he bent down to kiss my neck, almost roughly. All I could do was stare into space, feeling his ministrations, my body responding almost eagerly to it.

Suddenly, he stopped and leaned back so that he was hovering over me. His eyes caught mine again and I stared up at him.

"I must tell you something." He said.

"Tell me anything." I squirmed under his gaze, wanting more, wanting him to touch me.

"I'm a vampire." He stated. "I drink blood. Are you okay with that?"

"Okay? Yeah." I responded.

"I like being around you Bella, do you know why?"

"Why, Edward?" My voice was low again, and I drank in his golden stare.

"Because, I have a special ability. I can read minds." He mused, brushing my hair back. "But for some reason, I cannot read yours."

"Does that mean that there's something wrong with me, Edward?" I asked, worried. I didn't want something to be wrong with me for Edward. The voice in the back of my head screamed that it was glad that he couldn't read it, but I suppressed that part.

"No, of course not. It makes you the perfect mate for me, Bella."

"I want to be the perfect mate for you, Edward."

"Not being able to read your thoughts is sometimes hard. But it means that you're the only person who I can't _hear _resisting me. I like that. It's like you're completely submitting yourself to me."

"I will submit myself to you." I chanted.

Suddenly Edward leapt off the bed, off me before I could comprehend, as if he heard something, and I snapped out of the trance he put me in with disgust. He lowered into a crouch, and I heard a feral snarl come from him. All of a sudden there was a huge crash and one of the walls flew in. Five large wolves came in with the breaking of concrete. Followed soon after that was the Cullen family, minus Alice, I noticed. The wolves surrounded Edward in a circle, growling. Edward gave a huge snarl and swiped at spotted grey wolf. The wolf yelped in pain, and I tried to go after it, realizing that I was still chained to the bed as I snapped back.

Dr. Cullen…Carlisle attempted to restrain Edward, but he was thrown against the wall, making some more concrete rain down, and all I could do was watch. After seeing The spotted grey wolf whimper in pain, backing off, the chocolate brown wolf roared, going after Edward, but was smacked across the face by him, his arms flailing. Emmett finally pounced on Edward from behind, in what I guess was a lucky hit. Carlisle was immediately on Edward as well, helping to restrain him. Esme jumped in, restraining Edward and trying to soothe him by talking to him. Jasper was by Esme's side with a hand over Edward's brow, staring directly at him. The wolves formed an outer ring, growling as Edward was shouting profanities trying to get out of their grip or make eye contact with any one of them.

"Look at me!" He shouted in Esme's face. She downcast her eyes, her face turned down into one of sadness.

Rosalie turned my way and looked straight at me, her eyebrows furrowing. She walked towards me, her heels clicking with every step she took.

"Bella, oh my God, I am so sorry. The whole family is so sorry." Rosalie gasped as she saw the chain around my waist.

"Will you help me?" I asked, looking at her. Her golden eyes, complete with the under eye shadows reminded me painfully of Edwards. She reached around me and did something, but within seconds, I was free. She threw pulverized chain dust aside and went to embrace me.

"I was so scared for your safety." Rosalie whispered."

"Why would you be scared for me? You barely even know me." I responded, confused.

"I know how Edward is, and you're such a good human being that you don't deserve what he did to you." Rosalie looked at me. "Please don't think that the whole family is the same as Edward. What he did was awful."

"I don't blame any of you for it." I replied, taking her hand.

"Did you make eye contact with him?" She asked. I looked down, embarrassed. How could I tell her that I did, when she warned me; asked me so politely not to? "Oh Bella, what happened?"

"I couldn't help it. It was his smell. It got me and then my mind went fuzzy."

"Damn. Damn. Damn." Rosalie hissed.

"If you'd excuse me, please." A hard voice said behind us. I looked around Rosalie to find Jacob standing there, almost vibrating.

"Jake, when did you get here?" I cried, getting up from the bed and jumping into his arms, landing against his bare chest. He caught me, burying his face into my neck.

"Bella, you don't know how worried I was." Jake said, his voice muffled by my skin.

"Why would you be worried?" Jake froze, pulling me back to look him in the eye. For a moment I was wary, but then realized that it was My Jake, not Edward looking at me, his brown eyes trusting and welcoming.

"Bella," he said, very seriously "you've been gone for a couple days."

"A couple days?" I managed. "How many is a couple?"

"Five. They found your truck abandoned down an old trucking road and called it in. There's been search parties looking for you in rivers, in dumpsters. Oh my God, it was terrible. I'm so relieved to have you in my arms again." He said, his eyes welling up with tears. I stared at him wordlessly as some spilled over and ran down his face. His sucked in a shaky breath. "I was so broken. I almost killed myself at the thought of you being dead."

I held on to him tighter, trying to squeeze impossibly tight.

"I'm just glad you came to save me."

"What do you mean, Bella. I'd give my life for you." He said, looking me in the eye.

"You were so mad when you hung up on me." I said lowly.

"I was only mad for a couple minutes. When I rationalized with myself, I did realize that maybe there was nothing you could do. I was madder at the fact that he took advantage of you than anything. When I tried to call back, there was no answer. After the seventh call, I started to get so worried. Then they found your truck." He choked back another sob. "I'm just so relieved, so happy that you're safe. I'm sure Charlie is going to have a heart attack when you come home safe. It's been a rough time for him because you're his only daughter."

"I'm going to be glad to be away from Edward again. To be back around you, Jakie, is such a huge relief." I replied.

Jake looked back at the scene behind him. The wolves were sitting in a group, trying to look relaxed, but very aware of the scene going on. They were obviously ready to attack if needed. The Cullen's had successfully carted Edward outside and were trying to talk him into going home. It seemed that they were successful as they piled him into a car with Emmett, Jasper and Rosalie, who took off hurriedly.

"May I speak with your leader?" Carlisle asked politely, turning to the wolves.

"I'd rather you speak with me." Jake said, venom dripping from his voice as he put me down and walked over, hand secured to mine.

"That's fine, that's even better." He said, looking from me to Jake.

"I must tell you a couple things about our kind."


	30. Axiom

Carlisle looked around at each of us mildly. He was trying to keep his cool as he waited for the wolves to gather around, but underneath you could tell he was frantic about the whole Edward situation. We stood outside of the warehouse: at my request. I didn't want to spend any more time in there than I had to. We were in a clearing of the orchard behind the building. Apple trees all around us flourished with the shiny red fruit, oddly enough for an abandoned building. Jake's arm was wound securely around my waist; I knew he was definitely not letting me go for a long time.

"Well, get on with it." Jake said, waving his hand.

"Jake." I whispered. There was absolutely no need for him to be rude to Carlisle.

"Don't, Bella." Jake whispered. Carlisle ran a hand through his blonde hair and looked at me tiredly.

"Bella." He said softly.

"You don't get to address her." Jake said rudely, seething with anger. A couple wolves behind me growled in agreement.

"Jake, its fine." I said as I put a hand on his chest. He looked down at me, his brown eyes big. "Jake." I repeated, and he relented, but the tension in his body remained.

"Yes, Carlisle?" I said, looking at Carlisle.

"I must tell you something about my family, and keep in mind that I do not share this lightly. There are consequences for letting a human in on such a huge secret, but I know that you are aware of the werewolves, very obviously. Edward, myself, my family, we are vampires. This shouldn't come as much of a shock, natural enemies to your werewolves." I heard a snort from behind me at that, probably Paul. Vampires, my mind went through all of the things I knew about vampires. Dead, burned in the daylight, slept in coffins, drank blood. Oh dear God, what did I get myself into?

"But that's not important, what is imp-"

"How come you guys haven't disintegrated into dust in the sunlight?" I cut Carlisle off. Alice snorted and crossed her arms over her chest, looking at me derisively.

"Because that's just silly. A myth. Idiotic." Alice said.

"Alice, that's enough." Carlisle gave her a hard look. He looked at Jake.

"We are truly sorry for what has happened, and the way that Edward treated Bella. You must know that he would not have harmed her."

"He could have bitten her! She's just a piece of meat to him!" Jake replied, his voice rising.

"No, he wouldn't have."

"You don't know that for sure!" Jake said, and Carlisle paused, looking down.

"No, we don't. But I've known Edward for a hundred years, and I want to believe that he wouldn't have hurt her."

"You're lucky that he didn't." Jake said, a warning in his low voice.

"Believe me, I am aware." Carlisle replied, looking back up at us. "I know of the practices of killing ones mate with wolves."

"What happens?" I asked, biting my nail. Jake pulled my nail out of my mouth, always on nail-biting duty.

"They die." Jake said, his voice cold. It washed over me, making me shiver. I couldn't imagine Jake killing anyone over me, having blood on his hands.

"They go into a frenzy; a mad bloodlust. Their conscience disappears and is replaced with a true evil." Carlisle bowed his head again, the subject weighing on him. Esme looked truly upset. As my eyes fell upon Alice, I noticed how bored she looked by the whole ordeal. I had thought that we were friends, but she was being a real bitch today.

I looked back at Carlisle who was now regarding Jake.

"Jacob, I must apologize once more on Alice's behalf." He turned and gave Alice a dirty look, but she merely shrugged. "We would have found your Bella sooner if she had been cooperating."

"Looks like you'll have to get your little coven more in line then." Jake said.

"Er, yes." Carlisle shifted uncomfortably. "Now there's something else about our kind that I think you should know."

"Carlisle, you don't have to tell them." Esme said, putting her hand on Carlisle's arm, but he covered it and looked tenderly at her.

"Honey, I do. I must tell them enough to understand what was going on." Carlisle smiled tenderly at her.

"Some of us have gifts, as I like to call them. My theory is that whatever trait was strongest with us when we were changed has carried on into this life, only stronger. Edward has an ability to read minds. But he cannot read yours. It was what intrigued him towards you, and probably what caused him to kidnap you. See, you are a perfect mate for him in every way, if you weren't with Jake, and that's what he sees. He believes that all he has to do is try to woo you when you're not around Jake, and he thinks that's the way to make you fall in love with him."

"Our relationship bond." I gasped. Old Quil had said something about how it was wavering. Was I falling in love with Edward? Jake looked at me in alarm. He had remembered what Quil said as well.

"It was wavering.." Jake whispered.

"How…how can I be a perfect mate for two people?" I swallowed nervously, my eyes flitting over the Cullens.

"There are a lot of unusual things about you, Bella." Carlisle said deeply. I nodded, tears coming to my eyes. Why had my life gotten so complicated? Why couldn't it just be Jake and I in the Reservation without a care in the world?

Jake's arms tightened around me. He had probably sensed my distress in this situation.

"There is another thing, something that all of us have, but prefer not to use. You have to work at it continuously to get it very strong. It is a part of our predator appeal." Carlisle started up again.

"What?" Jake said sharply.

"We call it compulsion. To use it, the prey has to meet eyes with the vampire using it. Then she or he can be entranced to do anything to the vampires bidding. There are varying degrees of it, some can only hold it for a few seconds, some can hold it as long as they are keeping eye contact, and some can hold it for much longer."

"The fuck! You bloodsuckers are so messed up." Jake took an abrupt step forward. Sam, suddenly changed and dressed, came and set a hand on Jake's chest, holding him back.

"Let him explain, Jacob." Sam said forcefully. Jake stopped, but stood his ground, his face menacing.

"If the human knows, and chooses not to look into the vampire's eyes, if he can get close enough, and she breathes in his scent, she will inescapably look into his eyes, thus commencing the compulsion. It doesn't take over you entirely, but it makes your outer body listen and act as the vampire chooses you will. Depending on the level of experience, the human will know what is happening, her head will be screaming back, knowing that she does not want to do what the vampire wants to do. In stronger humans, they are able to shake it off. In stronger vampires, the human believes that what the vampire compulses them to do is what they want to do." Carlisle finished, sounding old and weary.

"This is what Edward's been doing to me?" I asked, suddenly understanding why he kissed me, why he smelled so great, why I didn't resist him.

"Yes, and Edward is quite strong. Not the strongest I've seen, but he's been working on it for some time. Most of the time he's been alive, really. I had no idea until you went missing that it was for a terrible cause. He cannot hear you think, therefore, he doesn't have to listen to how you're resisting him in your head. He's quite delusional when it comes to you, Bella, and because he cannot hear you think, it is to his understanding that you are not resisting."

"Well, that sucks. If only my mind wasn't stupid."

"It a very good quality. If you were to become a vampire…" All of the wolves let out a great growl, and it made my heart swell. I was the wolves property, and they were going to protect me if needed. I squeezed the very tight body of Jake. Carlisle held up his hand again.

"All I'm saying is that she would have immense powers if she were to become one of us." Cue another round of snarling. "Not that I would want that for you Bella.

"Well, thank you for the information Dr. Cullen." Jake said, almost snarling his name. "But we must be going."

"Yes, I thank you for staying this long." Carlisle said, backing away. "I wish you all the best." Alice snorted and ran off, Carlisle and Esme immaterialized before my eyes. Jake swept me up, crushing me in his arms again. He began sobbing; a dry, heaving sound. I rubbed his back, still very much caught up in what I had just learned and in shock of what happened.

"Did he do anything to you?" Jake's voice was muffled in my hair.

"I don't know…" I said, unsure. He pulled back, holding me at arms level.

"What…What do you mean you don't know?" He raised an eyebrow at me.

"I just woke up this morning." I answered, looking at him. His eyes widened impossibly.

"You've been out for the past four days?" His voice trembled.

"Well, I don't know..I passed out and then I woke up. I couldn't really keep track of how long I was out for."

"He could have done anything to you! Do you feel any different? Any pain…" He lowered his voice to a whisper. "down there?"

I wiggled around, trying to feel anything different about my body. I was so tired I could sleep for four more days, but no, it hadn't felt like anyone touched me. Nothing about me felt different. I hoped Edward was just delusional and _not_ a rapist.

"No, Jake. I don't feel any different." I replied finally, I could feel Jake getting more anxious the longer I was silent.

"We should definitely get you checked out though." He said, with finality. I knew there was no getting out of it. "I'll take you to the hospital, come on." He got up and pulled my arm, dragging me along with him. He swung me up into his arms, one carefully behind my neck and one under my knees. He took off on a slow jog, very determined in his quest.

"How long until we get there?" I asked, putting my arms around his neck.

"Not long now. If you're feeling sick, close your eyes. You're not getting jostled around too much, are you?" He asked, looking down at me. I leaned up and placed my lips against his.

"I'm comfortable as long as I'm in your arms." I smiled up at him. He grinned.

It took longer than Jake said; it appeared that we were pretty far out of town, probably an idea of Edward's for seclusion. Since no one was ever really in the hospital, we went straight in.

"How are you today?" A female doctor walked in, putting gloves on. Jake and I had been sitting in the room for about ten minutes in thoughtful silence. It seemed that Jake couldn't articulate what he wanted to say, and I didn't really have anything to say.

"I'm good, thanks." I gave her a small smile.

"What can I do for you?" She asked, the smile ever present, looking at us in turn.

"We want you to check Bella for signs on sexual assault."

The doctor looked alarmed for a moment.

"Do you think that you've been sexually assaulted?" She asked slowly, looking at me.

"I don't know, I was kidnapped and out for a couple days, who knows what they could have done to me?" I was still unsure of this whole thing.

"Okay. Would you like him to stay?" She asked, gesturing to Jake.

"Yes, please." I looked over at Jake. He gave me a tender smile. I gestured for him to turn around, and he complied easily, turning and looking out the window.

"First, I want to check your body for any bruises that could mean sexual assault." She said professionally. Luckily, I had changed into the hospital dress before this, but I still profusely blushed as she checked me over.

"Now, if you could lay down on the bed and put your feet in these. This will be quick and painless." I did as she asked, blushing even more. I had never shown my lady parts to anyone but myself. Jake hadn't even seen it yet. He took my hand in reassurance, staying very diligent at the window. I squeezed him as hard as I could.

"There are no signs of sexual assault down here." The doctor said from between my legs. "You don't have any signs of forced entry, no bleeding from a broken hymen. I really want to make sure, I'm going take a couple swipes and have it tested."

"Yes, please do that." Jake threw in, before I even got a chance to answer.

"Have you voided your bowels before coming here?" She asked, looking at me. I shook my head. "Good, just one second."

"Alright," She said, finishing up and putting the swipes in a bag. "This will only take a couple hours if you want to wait out in the waiting room."

"We'll do that."

"I'll leave you to get changed, and I'll see you in a couple hours." She smiled at us before leaving the room, shutting the door behind her. I pulled my underwear and pants on under the dress and took it off to reveal my bra.

"Wait." Jake said, moving forward and touching my waist gently. "What is this from?"

"What?" I asked, and he nodded at my wait. I looked down, and there was a series of light bruises around me, decorating my waist in a chain fashion.

"Oh my God, what did he do to you?"

"There was a chain around my waist, holding me to the bed." I said, remembering I had lurched forward to a sitting position and discovered it, leaving me a very small movement range.

"I'll kill that bastard." He growled.

"Jake, it's over with." I said, putting a hand on his chest.

"You always downplay everything, Bella. Including when you almost got raped by that other guy."

"I try not to let it bother me." I replied.

"You are a danger magnet." He smiled finally, putting his hand on my back. I put my shirt on and we left to sit in the waiting room.

Once we were there, I laid my head down on Jake's chest and fell asleep, once again dead to the world.

Tell me what you think! Where do you think the story is going, what kind of guesses have you made, and what do you think? What do you hate me for? Tell me anything in a review!


	31. Inviolable

I awoke a little while later, and as we sat and waited for any results to come through, I could feel Jake looking at me. Both of his hands were occupied with me, one stroking the back of my neck, the other holding my hand, his thumb softly caressing it. When I looked up at him, his face was tender, but I could see a fire raging in his eyes.

"What is it?" I asked softly, leaning into him.

"I just love you so much." He replied, leaning down and kissing my temple. "I'm so incredibly glad to have you back in my arms."

"I'm so glad to be back in your arms, Jakie." I said up to him. He smiled. "Why do your eyes look angry though?"

Jake grimaced, looking away. He was pensive for a few minutes as he stared at the grey walls.

"You know me too well." His voice was low as he looked back down at me. "I'm angry because he took you. I'm angry because I wasn't there to stop it, or find you until today. I'm angry because I was mad at you."

"It's okay now though, I'm back with you." I brushed my hand across his face. He squeezed his eyes shut and then opened them again. They were filled with tears threatening to escape.

"It's okay now. But over and over, I thought, what if that was the last conversation we had, ever?" His voice broke. "What if the last thing I ever said to you was 'doesn't change anything, sorry'? The last week was so hard knowing that, and it nearly drove me insane. I was so worried. Know that I looked for you as hard as I could, I searched everywhere."

"I know you did." I whispered. "I had faith that you would find me, of course."

"I'm so stupid." He whispered back. A single tear tried to roll down his cheek, but he flicked it away roughly.

"Bella Swan?" A voice said, and both of our heads snapped up.

"That's me." I said, standing up. Jake followed suit, his hang grasping at mine.

"Miss Swan, we've checked out your swab, and we haven't found any DNA on it that would lead to your being assaulted, or any forced entry. You're still you." The doctor smiled brilliantly. I let out a breath of air and looked up at Jake. He looked positively ecstatic. He turned to me and picked me up, swinging me around.

"You're clean, you're clean, you're clean!" He sang, grinning wide.

"Is there anything else that I can do for you guys?" The doctor asked pleasantly.

"No, thank you." I said, and she nodded smiling.

"Thank you so much." Jake shook her hand, and she walked away. He looked down at me. "Now what do you say we call the Chief so he stops worrying?"

"That sounds terrific." Even though I had been unconscious for the majority of the five days, I had missed Charlie. He must be so worried about me. Why hadn't anybody called Charlie to tell him I was alright? Why hadn't I even thought of it?

Jake put his arm around me and we walked toward the door of the hospital. He opened the door for me, his hand not once leaving my body, as if he could make sure I was there at all times by keeping a hold of me. As my eyes adjusted from the low lighting of the hospital to the almost equally dark and cloudy weather, I saw Charlie speed-walking towards us, a huge smile on his face. As he got closer, I saw the worry lines in his forehead as tears rolled down his face.

"Oh my God, Bella!" He yelled gruffly, pulling me to him. He kissed the top of my head as he hugged me tightly. He then held me out at arms length. "Now, don't you ever do that to me again, I was so worried." He said, wiping the tears away roughly.

"It's good to finally be back." I agreed, smiling up at him.

"You don't know how good it is to have you back." Charlie said.

"I do know how good it is to be back." I replied, and Jake gave me a squeeze.

"I do want to catch the son of a bitch who took you though." Charlie's eyes narrowed menacingly, and he reached towards the gun in his holster. "Who was it?"

"I don't know, Dad. I didn't get to see him. Jake found me when he was gone, and took me before he got back. I've been out for the last four days. Well, Jake tells me that's how long I've been gone." My voice shook with the lie. Revealing who it was would reveal the secrets that I had been trusted with about the wolf pack.

"You didn't even see him come up to you?" Charlie asked, his eyes wide.

"No, he snuck up behind me." I looked down, so that Charlie wouldn't see the deceit in my eyes.

"You don't remember anything?" Charlie was getting his interrogator voice on, the one he always used when I was a kid, and did something bad.

"Nothing." I mumbled. Jake pulled me into him, forming a protective blanket of warmth around me.

"Charlie, I'm sorry, but Bella's had a pretty hard day and if you could just give her a break so she can sort through it all…" Jake's voice was gentle, as he asked Charlie to let up on me. "She might remember something later on, but I've already asked her all that I could as well. She doesn't remember a thing." Charlie's eyebrows furrowed in worry as he contemplated what Jake said.

"You're right. Bells, I'm sorry. I'm still worked up from looking for you. I'm so glad I can finally call the search off, and you didn't turn up…" He swallowed loudly, and then shook it off, ruffling my hair. "I missed ya, kiddo." He smiled at me.

"I missed you too, Dad." I said, smiling at him.

"Let's get you home and safe." Charlie said, walking back towards the cruiser. Jake and I followed suit, getting in the back.

"I'm going to go to the station to close some things up." Charlie chattered sternly as he drove. I sat in the middle, leaning on Jake. "But I will be back right away. Well, as soon as I can. But I don't want you going anywhere. I want you to stay locked up in the house. That's why I'm letting Jake stay, so he can protect you." I smiled up at Jake, knowing he would protect me at any cost, but I almost laughed at Charlie telling me to stay in the house. If Edward wanted me that bad, a little old wood house wouldn't stop him. I shivered in disgust. Jake felt it, and pulled me in tighter.

"I won't let her leave, Chief." Jake said, putting his chin up.

"That's a good boy." Charlie replied. "Your truck's in the driveway. That doesn't give you any excuse to go out tonight, or ever."

"Dad!" I laughed, but he sounded almost serious. He was probably never going to let me go again.

"Bells, I don't want you getting stolen again, and you seem to get into trouble more than the average person does. I'm going to get you a beeper so if anything does happen, I can come find you. Or I could implant a GPS into your body."

"That would be probably be a good idea." Jake put in.

"Thanks for finding her Jacob. You don't know how much I appreciate it." Charlie looked at Jake in the rear-view.

"It was no problem, sir. I think I was just lucky to find her." Jake looked at me as he said it, his eyes tender. I kissed his shoulder.

"I was lucky." I said.

"That's exactly why I am never letting you out of the house again." Charlie said gruffly as he pulled into the driveway belonging to our quaint little house. Boy, was I glad to be home. I looked around the yard, and quite suddenly noticed a silver Acura sitting in our driveway, quite out of place next to the old Chev.

"Dad…" I asked, slowly. Is that who I thought it was?

"Bella, I'm so sorry. I called her as soon as you went missing. She was frantic. I thought she should know." Charlie frowned over at the Acura.

"Dad, why? Why didn't you tell me she would be here, so I could at least _prepare_ myself or something?" I practically screeched. I shifted uncomfortably and Jake adjusted to accommodate me.

"Bells, it won't be so bad. She'll probably only end up staying a couple minutes with your temper, darling." Jake said lowly to me, kissing the top of my head.

"It will be so bad. I thought I made it clear that I didn't want to see her!" I slumped in my seat.

"She's been worried about you." Charlie glanced over his shoulder at me, looking concerned. "I'd send her away, but there's not even a chance she'll go."

"You're right. I'm not happy about this." I crossed my arms over my chest, pulling my face into an angry scowl. Charlie looked uncomfortable, and even Jake shifted away from me a little bit.

Renée opened the door of her car and slid out. She smoothed out her dress and turned towards the cruiser, taking a running start in her six inch heels. She looked ridiculous, in an expensive dress and high heels against the shabby house, the small town. It was hard to believe that she and Charlie had ever been together.

"Bella!" Renée screamed, looking delighted. "I'm so glad that you're okay!"

"Same as before." I looked past Jake up at her. Was it right for me to still carry bitter feelings towards her for leaving us? I'd have to ask Jake.

"I was so worried about you." She leaned down, probably too much, but maybe that's how she did it in Phoenix. I got a view of most of her cleavage down the scoop-neck. Jake cleared his throat and looked out the other side of the car,

"I got home safe." I gave her my best fake smile, trying to keep the conversation as short as possible.

"Alright Bella, I have to go and take care of some things so I can be back here." Charlie said, getting out of the car. Jake got out and I followed suit, keeping a tight grasp on his hand. I hugged Charlie before he got back in the cruiser and drove away, leaving the only protection between Renée and I, Jake. I halfway hid behind him as I watched the cruiser go out of sight.

"Bella." Renée clasped her hands together, looking at me and smiling.

"What." I asked, my voice toneless.

"What do you say we go inside and catch up for real?" Renée grinned, linking her arm through mine. I decided to just go along with it. "…alone." She stressed the word, looking pointedly at Jake.

"Jake isn't leaving yet." I countered, just as Jake opened his mouth to talk. "He's staying as long as he or I want."

"Well, I just, I wanted, us…" Renée spluttered, obviously having expected me to agree with her about sending Jake home. There was no way I was letting him out of my sight for a long time.

"He stays, Renée." I said firmly, squeezing Jake's hand. She shook it off. Was it okay to think my mother was naïve and a little damaged? I didn't know. All I knew was that I wanted to crawl into bed with Jake beside me, making me sweat. With his body heat, of course, but that lead me to think of the other ways he could make me sweat. I felt Jake tense up beside me, squeezing my hand. He tilted his head towards me, breathing in, his eyes darkening. Oh shit, that feeling passed through me: realization. He could smell my arousal. His eyes had darkened with lust, which meant he wanted me as bad as I wanted him. Was he thinking about me the same way? He was always such a gentleman.

Jake's head lolled back and he closed his eyes as we walked in through the door. His big hand caught my waist and he pulled me into him.

"You'll be the death of me." He groaned into my ear, his voice hot and deep. A moan escaped my throat.

"Bella, this is the house your father chose to live in? How do you live in this?" Renée asked, snapping us out of our moment. She had been wandering through the house, very much judging what had happened since she left. "If he moved, you would think that he would have gone somewhere more exciting. Not the town we met in."

"Not everyone feels the need to movie on a whim." I replied, bored with her already. She ignored it, seizing the opportunity to look around while Charlie wasn't home. Her outfit looked so much out of place in here too.

Jake and I sat down at the kitchen table, sinking into the old chairs. We were both exhausted from the week, and wanted to lie down, but had to keep Renée company. She finally wandered into the kitchen, her nose wrinkled in disgust.

"If you don't like it, leave." I said tiredly. "This is my home."

"It's not…that bad." Renée said, daintily lowering herself into the chair opposite me. She leaned back, crossing one leg over the other.

"It's pretty nice." I said.

"That's because you haven't experienced the world, Bella." Renée said, turning to me, a new excitement in her eyes. "I wish you would let me take you to exciting places, and travel, and live with me."

"I don't want that kind of life though," I protested. "I'm happy living in Forks, or in La Push. It's not that big of a deal to me." I saw Jake's lips curve into a smile.

"Come with me for a vacation then, come to Italy." Renée was almost begging. "We'll go shopping, we'll explore. We can go to Milan, the fashion capital of the world; we can do whatever we want!" I shuddered at that whole sentence. Shopping wasn't exactly my thing. I was more of a jeans and t-shirt kind of girl. I must have gotten most of my habits from Charlie; I would have liked to hope so, anyway. I shook my head at her, telling her no, I did not want to go to Italy with her.

"Please Bella, let me make up for what I've done." Renée said, looking at me with puppy-dog eyes. She pulled her lip-glossed lips into a pout.

"I don't want to go." I replied. "I especially don't want to go to the fashion capital of the world." Who was this girl that was talking? Of course I wanted to travel, I wanted to get out of this little town and see what the world had to offer. I was being stupid by refusing her request; I was being like a child. But she had left Charlie and I high and dry, leaving one night and never contacting me again. What a stupid thing of her to do. This made me angry all over again, but this was an anger that I hadn't realized that I held for Renée. I glared at her.

"Bella, please. We can take Jake along as well. Do you want to go to Italy, Jake?" Renée turned on Jake, knowing that if she could convince him, she would get to me.

"Well, I..er," Jake's eyes swivelled between the two of us. "If Bella wants to." He finished, leaving it still up in the air.

"I promise Bella, I won't try to convince you to come live with me, or anything. It'll just be us and Phil getting to know each other better, after so long apart." Who did she think she was? Didn't she know that if she had've stayed, then we could have known each other? Renée was utterly absurd.

"I'd have to think about it." I replied. "It's a big decision."

Renée nodded, as if she understood. Really, I was way too tired to combat her right now, and I'd have to discuss it with Jake, and Charlie. Oh, Dad. He wasn't going to let me leave the house again, let alone the country off on a whim with his wife who left so many years ago.

"I understand, Bella. You take however long you want to think about it. I know you just got back from a big thing, and you're probably tired." Spot on, lady. "It was silly of me to bombard you like this, aren't I such an idiot." She fanned herself as if to rid the silliness she had acquired.

"So, I'm just going to go have a nap, it's been a long couple of days." I said, standing up.

"Renée stood up as well, gathering me into a hug. I awkwardly tapped her back a couple times before letting go, but she held on for a few more minutes.

As soon as she let me go, I side-stepped over to the door to avoid anymore hug attacks.

"Thanks for coming and keeping me company while Dad was gone…" I said, looking at Renée.

"It was no problem; of course I wanted to make sure you were alright!" She cooed. I bit back a retort, and instead focused my gaze on Jake.

"Coming, Jake?" I asked, and he shook back to life, standing up at the table. I starting heading up the stairs and I could feel Jake right behind me, leaping up to get away from my mother as well.

I opened the door to my room. It was the same as it was when I left it, clothes thrown over the back of my computer chair, my covers thrown back, my wardrobe open and papers scattered all over the desk. I slid in the bed, I loved the way the covers felt when I didn't make my bed: fluffy almost. I snuggled in, pulling them up to cover my chin and patted the spot next to me.

"I can't believe you're still standing there." I said to him, he looked at me, almost startled.

"Oh, sorry. I drifted off there for a couple seconds." He replied, shoving his hands in his pockets.

"Well, don't just stand there still! Get over here, silly!" I said, smiling at him. He didn't waste any more time as he slid in the bed next to me, wrapping me in another blanket of warmth.

"Jake, I…" I started, but I was suddenly to tired to make conversation. I decided to just let it overcome me, and I was pretty sure that by Jake's soft breathing, he was already asleep as well.


	32. Bestowal

I woke up when Jake rolled on top of me, physically on top of me. Normally, I would have been thrilled about this circumstance, but he was sleeping and he was heavy. I couldn't breathe under all his weight, it was constricting my airway.

"Jake." I wheezed, not very loud. It was nothing that would wake the sleeping giant. "Jake!" I tried again. Nothing, he was out cold. He must not have slept very much when he was out searching for me, which means he was going to be near impossible to wake up. _Near impossible._ I started frantically kissing whatever part of him I could reach, touching him with my free hand.

"Mmmph, Bella." Jake said sleepily. He was almost back into consciousness.

"Jake, I can't breathe." I whispered. He shot up in the bed, finally off of me. I sucked in beautifully refreshing air. "Oh, thank you."

"I'm so sorry, Bella." Jake ran a hand through his hair, looking apologetic. "I guess I get crazy in my sleep." He let out a nervous laugh.

"It's alright. You're just not as light as you used to be." I smiled at him. He flopped back down beside me, huffing.

"I can't help if I gained weight, Bella." He looked at me, sticking his lower lip out into a pout. I burst out laughing at him.

"Don't even." I said between giggles. He play-growled and launched himself on top of me. I giggled ecstatically, revelling in having Jake around. Jake stopped and sat up, his warm eyes focused on me.

"Jake hungry." He said grinning.

"Well, let's get Jake something to eat." I replied, puckering at him. He obliged, his soft lips meeting mine. He deepened it without hesitation, which made my heart jump into my throat.

Jake's stomach suddenly let out a raucous rumble. He pulled away and looked at me, then down at his stomach and back up at me. His lids were heavy as he licked his lips, obviously wanting more.

"Let's go eat." I cupped his cheek in my hand. "You're a hungry boy." I poked his stomach and he sat back with a smile on his face.

"Okay, I am pretty hungry." He grinned as he took my hand and led me down the stairs. We rounded into the kitchen where we were bombarded right away by a flurry of brown hair bright lipstick and floral print.

"Bella! So glad to see you up and about!" Renée gushed, following us to the table. Charlie sat there, looking unimpressed. She plopped herself down in the remaining seat, looking at me expectantly. I forgot that she had come back, turning everything upside down.

"Yeah, I came down to get some breakfast." I replied looking at Charlie. He shrugged back. I stood up, preparing to get some cereal.

"No need." Renée ushered me back down into the chair, grabbing a plate from the microwave. She swept around and grabbed two plates from the cupboard, setting them down in front of Jake and I. "I made French toast for the two of you!" She set down the plate in front of the two of us and I saw Jake's eyes light up. He started reaching for it, then stopped and looked up at me, his eyes pleading. I nodded my head and he grabbed eight off the top.

"How was your sleep?" Renée asked conversationally, taking a sip out of her cup of coffee. Like that woman really needed coffee. Again I wondered what she was doing here, and why Charlie was allowing it. I turned to him, not caring that I was being incredibly rude to Renée.

"What is she doing here again?" I whispered to him.

"She wanted to be here to make sure you were alright. I can't just tell her to go away from her daughter." Charlie whispered back, looking down at the floor.

"Yes you can. That's what you should do," I whispered back. He merely shook his head and went back to drinking his coffee, staring off at the far wall.

"My sleep was good. I feel pretty rested." I replied, looking at Renée, willing her to leave.

"Oh, that's good." She cooed back at me.

"Yeah…Did you spend the night here?" I asked, squinting at her. She stared back at me, unruffled.

"I did, I just slept on the couch. Not a big deal." She pursed her lips.

"Oh." I replied stupidly.

"Have you thought about my offer?" She asked after stealing a glance at Charlie. He snapped into the conversation suddenly.

"What offer?" He demanded.

"Oh Charlie, it's nothing. I just told Bella that she and Jake should come with me to Italy. I saw her eyes light up when I told her that we can go to the shopping capital of the world!" Renée said grandly, lifting her arms up.

"I would think not" Charlie said gruffly at the same time that I protested "My eyes did not light up!" Out of the corner of my eye I saw Jake shovelling French toast in his mouth so that he would not have to be part of the conversation. Charlie turned to me.

"You want to go to Italy?" He asked incredulously.

"Calm down Dad, I didn't give her an answer!" I replied, holding up my hands in surrender.

"Charlie, I'll pay for everything. It's not really a problem." Renée started in on convincing Charlie, even though I hadn't even told her that I actually _wanted _to go. There was no telling Renée no.

"It's not the money that's the problem." Charlie said gruffly, raising his voice. I looked at Jake, widening my eyes to tell him that we needed to get out of there. He rose from the table and followed me into the foyer. Jake stopped in front of me and reached up to run his hand down my face.

"What do you think?" Jake asked me, leaving the question open-ended for me to answer any of the million questions that had come up in the past twelve hours.

"I think…" I said, trailing off as I thought. Jake kept a hand on me the entire time. "Can we go down to La Push please?" I looked up at him with what I thought would be a cute smile.

"Anything for you." Jake said softly. He leaned down, pressing his lips to mine.

"Should we tell Charlie?" I asked, after he stood back up, but upon listening to the raised voices coming from the kitchen, we both shook our heads. "I'll leave a note."

After writing a note addressed specifically to Charlie telling him where we were going, we were in the truck heading down the road to the reservation. I realized that there was something nagging at me to talk to Jake about, but my face flushed just thinking about it.

"Why are you blushing?" Jake asked, looking at me. I stared at him.

"How did you know?" I asked, mouth agape. "You weren't looking at me before now."

"I could smell it, love." He replied, stroking my hand. "I ask again, why are you blushing?" He smiled.

"I…uh…" I started, but I blushed even harder.

"Bella." Jake said seriously. "You can talk to me about anything."

"I know, I know." My face was burning, and I looked down at my lap because avoiding eye contact might help me get it out finally. "Do you feel an…urge…to…you know…" I mumbled. "It keeps getting stronger…the need." I tried to articulate it, but couldn't seem to string the right words together. Jake was silent for a moment, and then looked at me with a sardonic smile on his face.

"Are you asking me if I feel the need to make love to you?" He asked, the words coming out fluidly.

"Um, yeah." I flushed even harder, if possible. He was silent again, and I finally looked up at him to see what the problem was. He was staring at me, an intense look on his face.

"I have a strong pull to complete our imprint, and to feel absolutely one with you." He said softly. I smiled despite the topic. "You don't have to feel uncomfortable about it, Bella. It's completely natural what you're feeling, I've told you that before."

"Or supernatural." I cut in, smiling at him. He chuckled.

"No, I'm sure it's pretty natural for a teenage girl. Especially when you're with someone as sexy as I am. Also, you remember what Old Quil said." He laughed, kissing me on the top of the head. I swatted at him, giggling. Jake always knew how to make me feel comfortable.

"It's just been getting stronger, especially since the imprint…kind of exponentially, and I don't know what to do with it. Are we…I also feel like best friends who kiss and tell each other we love each other. We haven't really done anything yet. Anything substantial. I feel so much, but I don't think I'm ready to go all the way." My voice got considerably lower as I rambled on, but his sensitive hearing definitely caught it.

"Those are understandable feelings." Jake nodded. "I've been feeling it too, so much; especially with those little things you do that just make me want to…" he cleared his throat "You know how adamant I've been about our first time being special and at a time when we're both ready."

"Jake, pull over." I said suddenly. Jake looked alarmed and pulled the truck off to the side of the road.

"Bella, what's wrong?" He asked as he put it in park. I undid his seatbelt and then my own and pulled him on top of me on the seat.

"Bella," Jake started, but I covered his mouth with mine, and he responded instantly. His tongue intertwined with mine as his body covered me, scalding my skin where his body touched it. He reached a hand up to intertwine in my hair and goose-bumps rose up all over my skin. My heartbeat pounded in my chest against Jake's, my skin flushed in a different way.

Jake reached behind him and turned the truck off, making it completely quiet except for the sound of our bodies and mouths moving together. He abandoned the pretence of trying to keep me at arms length and kissed me as passionately as he had done only one night before. He kissed down to my neck and nibbled on it, eliciting a moan from me.

"Bella, I don't want to deprive you of anything, and I don't want you to feel like I have." Jake said between planting kisses on my neck.

"I don't." I managed, arching myself against him. I began to rub my hand over his body, and it made him rub harder against me.

"Touch me, Jake – please." I whispered. He hesitantly brought his hand up to my stomach, rubbing it, moving slowly up. "Under my shirt."

His hand slipped under my shirt and I panted with vehemence. His brown eyes were on mine as his hand reached the curve of my breast and he cupped it. I hummed with pleasure at him touching me, which egged him on. His hand slipped underneath my bra.

"Is this okay?" Worry crossed his face for a second as his eyebrows knit together. I nodded quickly and he ran his thumb over my nipple, squeezing. I arched against him once more and he smiled at what he was doing to me and pressed himself into me. I could feel how excited he was, and I was surprised he hadn't stopped me yet. I pulled him down to me again, thrusting my tongue into his mouth. He kissed back with the same passion.

After a while, he sat back and I sat up on the seat, both of us panting from the events. His eyes were dark as he regarded me. I stared back at him.

"That was…" He started, but ran his hand through his hair.

"Fun." I finished. He nodded.

"About going…"

"To La Push? Yeah, let's go."

"Okay." He reluctantly turned back to the steering wheel, starting up the truck and pulling back onto the road. He put his arm around me and pulled me into him as he drove.

Jake pulled into his driveway and turned the truck off once more. He turned to me as he took off his seatbelt.

"What do you want to do here?" He asked, studying me carefully.

"See our friends, maybe?" I suggested. He nodded and pulled me out of the truck with him. We walked to Embry's house first; he lived the closest to Jake.

"Hello Jake! Bella!" Embry's mom looked tired as she opened the door, but she greeted us with a smile. "Embry and Bina are in his room, come in, come in." She ushered us in and left back toward the kitchen. Jake knocked on Embry's door.

"Come in." I heard him grunt. We walked in and a blush showed on Embry's dark face.

"Ahh! Bella!" Bina yelled, leaping off the bed and into my arms. She hugged me tightly and I wrapped my arms around her small body. "I've missed you so much. You should have seen how much of a wreck Jake was while you were gone."

"Hey Bella." Embry said, almost shyly from the back, his hands shoved deep in his pockets.

"Hey Em." I smiled over at him. He grinned and looked at the floor. It was weird to see such a hulking and muscled figure such as Embry to be so bashful. Bina pulled away from me and pulled out her phone, typing furiously.

"What are you doing?" I asked, peering at her phone.

"Texting Quil, Leah, Seth." Bina replied absentmindedly. "Nobody has seen you for_ever_, Bella."

"Why bother texting Leah?" Embry mumbled. "It's not like she cares anyway."

Quil then strutted through Embry's door with a huge smile on his face. He grinned when he looked at me and bundled me up into a tight hug.

"Glad you're back." He grunted and let me go, going to stand beside Jake.

"Bella!" Seth bounced in, looking very much like a puppy. He hugged me, being the same height as I was at this point. Seth was lanky, but he still didn't look like Quil, Embry or Jake. Leah strode in behind Seth, looking moodier than she ever had.

"Oh, look who's finally back and the centre of attention once again." Leah snarled.

"She's been getting worse everyday." Jake whispered to me. "She wouldn't even help look for you. This Sam thing must be hard on her."

"You try having your love leave you for your cousin, Jacob." Leah snapped, overhearing Jake's rough voice. Quil put his hands up innocently

"Anyway," Bina said, putting her hand on Leah's shoulder. Leah shrugged it off and took a step back, looking angry.

"Yeah, anyway. Your return gives us an excuse to have a bonfire, and I like the sounds of that." Quil said, rubbing his hands together.

"Bonfire it is!" Bina yelled whole-heartedly. "I love to party!" She grinned at Embry, walking over and grabbing his shirt and kissing him on the mouth. He looked surprised and happy at the gesture.

"Hmm." I heard Jake hum.

"What?" I asked, looking up at him. He looked at me, surprised.

"Oh, nothing." He replied, looking over at Quil.

"So, are we going to hail Bella for being back or what?" Leah asked, crossing her arms over her chest. "I'm ready."

"Leah, what's your problem with me?" I asked, tired of the stabs. Leah and I used to be good friends.

"What's your problem with getting caught up with the bloodsuckers?" She asked, and stormed out. Seth looked at me apologetically.

"I have to follow her." Seth said, he grabbed my hand and gave it a squeeze before running out.

"Weird…" I started, but Bina cut in.

"No, it's just normal unpleasant Leah this week, one thing after another. She's attacked all of us so far, except Seth, of course." She said as Embry took her hand. "It kind of hurts."

"Yeah…a bit." I replied, looking at the floor. Jake rubbed my back to console me.

When I looked back up, Quil was looking at us strangely, squinting his eyes then squeezing them shut and reopening them.

"What is it, Quil?" I asked, staring at him. Jake's head snapped up before I had finished the sentence.

"It's just…weird." Quil turned his head sideways as he stared at us, not unlike a dog hearing an odd sound.

"Is it something you see?" Jake asked, sounding excited.

"Yeah. That." Quil still had his head tilted to the side. He turned his head towards Embry and Bina, then back to us. Jake almost jumped for joy.

"Embry, go run and get Sam! Tell him to go to Old Quil's house immediately." Jake ordered, grabbing my hand. "Quil, come with Bella and I."

"What about me?" Bina asked, stepping in front of Jake. "I'm coming with you, right?"

"Wrong. Go home." Jake said. Bina pouted up at him.

"No." She replied, putting her hands on her hips.

"Yes. Go home." Jake's voice boomed. He was getting impatient, and it was very rare that he brought out such a commanding voice. Bina shrank back, and then followed Embry out.

We walked outside, and Jake threw me up on his back, setting a quick pace towards Old Quil's place.

"You know, you still stink." Jake said, curling his nose up at me.

"Excuse me?" I feigned madness at him, crossing my arms over my chest. He chuckled.

"You haven't washed the leech off you yet." Jake said. "You smell sweet, but grossly so. It makes me want to throw up." He retched.

"You definitely do smell bad." Quil said, still looking at us weird. "It almost hurts my nose." I ignored their jibes and looked up at Jake.

"Why did they all listen to you so readily?" I asked him. He looked down at me, pursing his lips.

"We're a family. We tend to listen to each other much more than we would under normal circumstances." Jake said, and I was ready to accept that as an answer.

"Or if you're a supposed to lead." Quil mumbled, but I caught it.

"What? What does that mean?" I stared at Jake. He sighed.

"You know how Sam's our leader? Well, it's supposed to me, my bloodline puts me as Alpha, but he stepped into the position and I let him because he was the first one to phase and he's ready to take the responsibility." Jake said.

"So your words carry a lot of weight anyway?" I asked.

"Yeah. He does a great job; I don't want to take that from him." Jake said humbly, setting me down at the gate of Old Quil's house. Sam stood in the front yard, arms crossed across his chest, Embry standing behind him.

Jake was right, Sam was a good leader, he ran a pack full of young boys, gave up his scholarship and college to stay and protect his people, he was calm and carried an air of leadership. In that moment, I understood why Jake was fond of him and had respect for him. All of my negative feelings towards Sam dissolved.

"Hey Jake. What did you bring me here for?" Sam asked, his voice booming with authority.

"I thought you might like to see this." Jake answered, grabbing my hand.

"See what?" He looked irritated, but Jake shook his head

"What is Bella doing here?" Sam asked.

"She's as much a part of the pack as I am, as Emily is." Jake said and gestured for Quil to knock.

Old Quil opening the door, looking almost confused, but a large smile broke onto his face as he regarded all of us.

"Quil," Jake almost bowed to the old man out of respect. "It's time. Quil's developed it."

"Oh good. All of you come in." Quil beamed at all of us, and we filed in, sitting down in the living room where Jake and I had only been a short time ago, and where I imagined Sam and Emily had sat when they encountered their imprint.

"I expect that I can get you all some tea." Old Quil said, and didn't wait for an answer. Sam followed him into the kitchen, and within ten minutes, they came back out with teacups for everyone. Old Quil sat down and waited for everyone to make their tea to their liking, fixing his own as well.

"I am to understand that something has been happening to you, Quil." Old Quil addressed young Quil.

"Yeah, it has been flickering on and off for a while, but it came on fully just a little while ago. I thought I was just seeing things. The first thing I saw was a golden cord connecting Jake to Bella, like a tether. Then I saw that I was tethered to everyone in the room, and everyone was tethered to each other, different colors. Blue cord from me to Bella and Bina, green and blue cord from me to Jake and Em. There's a green cord from me to you. I don't know what's going on." Quil's eyes were wide, and his tough façade disappeared.

"It's nothing to worry about." Jake said softly. I reached over and grabbed his hand. He squeezed.

"No, it's not." Old Quil said. "As an Ateara, you were given a special gift."

"A gift?" Quil sounded scared. He loved being a wolf, but he was worried about having a gift?

"You saw Jake and Bella, and you saw the connection between Embry and Bina, correct?" Old Quil asked.

"Yeah. They were different."

"There's a reason, yes?" Old Quil asked, and Quil thought about it, his face scrunched up in confusion. I wanted to blurt out the answer, but I had a feeling that Old Quil wanted Quil to reach the conclusion on his own.

"Is it because…Jake imprinted on Bella and Embry hasn't on Bina?" Quil guessed finally.

"Correct. What colour is Jake and Bella's cord?"

"It's pure golden."

"And Embry and Bina's?"

"Yellow, with a pink ribbon wound around it." Quil answer. Old Quil looked at Embry as if he was almost disappointed, and Embry blushed even thought it wasn't clear why he was looking at him.

"Back when the Ateara family first became involved with the wolf tribe, the wolf spirits gave us a sacred gift. We can see the connections between people, their relationships. I knew you would develop the gift soon after you phased for the first time. It fully blossomed when you saw the relationship between an imprint and imprintee, which happened to be Jake and Bella."

"Can I see who is going to imprint?"

"Yes. You can see the relationship between people, how it is faring, how strong it is, but especially on imprinted wolves and their mates. You can see who will imprint on whom. But the thing is that you cannot tell anyone, ever. You cannot mess with fate or you die."

"D-die." Quil looked stricken, the colour faded out of his face. "This is such a big responsibility."

"It is up to you to make sure the imprint's are okay, that their relationship continues on the path towards perfection, as it should. You need to advise them when needed, keep an eye on them, because a wolf is at their strongest when their relationship with their imprint is at its strongest." Quil was speechless; his mouth flopped open and closed like a fish as he processed this information. His hand was still squeezing mine as he looked around at anyone.

"Don't think of this as a curse, Quil." Sam said, his voice low.

"Yeah, think of you as a matchmaker-psychologist." Embry grinned.

"I've never even been good with girls, I'm not a matchmaker." Quil protested.

"You will be. It's not even matchmaking. You're making your pack stronger." Old Quil said, and that seemed to calm Quil down. "For example, look at Bella and Jake. What do you see?"

"Their cord is glowing gold, it's bright."

"And what do you conclude from that?" Old Quil asked wisely.

"That their relationship is strong? I don't know." I could tell that Quil felt like an idiot.

"Yes. That's exactly what it is." He turned to Jake and I. "And it's good to see that you worked everything out." Jake nodded in agreement. "Ay, my sight is fading as Quil's grows stronger. It is time to pass the gift on."

"Well, it seems like you and Quil have a lot to talk about, sir." Sam said. "We should go."

"We do. Thank you, Sam. Thank you all for bringing him here. Jacob." Jake stood up to shake the man's hand before taking mine. We left young Quil with his grandfather and walked out the door.

e


	33. Bereavement

Jake and I had excused ourselves and headed back to my house. We walked in the door only to be bombarded by the same thing we had left hours before. Charlie and Renée were talking in overly loud voices, not shouting but with angry tones laced through their voices.

"There is no need!"

"Yes there is! I want her to be able to experience the world before she settles down with that Black boy!"

"That _Black boy _is pretty much family, you know that. And you barely even know Bella! She can handle much more than you give her credit for, you would know that if you hadn't just left!"

"I don't want her to make the same mistakes I did!" Ouch.

Jake and I snuck upstairs, but there was nowhere in the house to go to escape the voices coming from the kitchen. Jake folded his large frame onto my bed.

"I think I might go shower." I said, grabbing his hands.

"I think you should go shower." Jake replied, smiling at me. I bent down to give him a peck on the cheek before taking off to the bathroom.

I revelled in the feeling of the shower, the hot water pounding down on me, washing away the past five days, washing off the feeling of having Edward touch me, the feeling of being unclean. I scrubbed my body and washed my hair twice before I got out, my skin red from the heat and vigorous washing. I towelled my hair dry and threw on the clothes that I had grabbed last minute before leaving my bedroom. A red t-shirt and yoga pants.

"Hey" Jake smiled at me as I walked in the bedroom.

"Hi again." I said, curling up in his arms. He hugged me against him.

"I guess I should do some homework, shouldn't I? I'm going back to school in a couple days, I should probably start that." I realized suddenly that I had a whole weeks worth of work to do. I sighed.

"Yeah, I think you need to, but I'll be right here." Jake said, rubbing my back. I snuggled further into him, turning around for attention from his lips. I barely even noticed that the fight downstairs had subsided.

I was getting lost in his eyes when he was suddenly distracted by something else. He cocked an ear towards the window, and then I heard it: howling from somewhere distant, most likely La Push.

"Bella, I have to go. That's a meeting call. Also a new voice." Jake gave me a soft kiss before standing up.

"Bella?" Charlie's voice called up dully.

"Take the front door." I said, getting up as well. I followed him out as he bound down the stairs and out the front door, where I figured he would disappear into the tree-line.

"Yeah Dad." I said, coming down the stairs.

"Bella it's…" Charlie's voice cracked as he swallowed loudly. "Harry. Harry Clearwater. He had a heart attack."

My heart stopped. Harry had just been alive. Oh god. What had happened? I stared at Charlie, my eyes wide in shock. He roughly wiped away a stray tear and cleared his throat. I stepped forward into his arms and he hugged me tightly, his chest heaving with the struggle ofholding back tears. I pulled away, still not believing what he had told me.

"Bella," Renée's slurred voice came from the entryway of the kitchen. She stumbled forward a couple of steps before looking at me with unfocused eyes, an empty bottle of wine clutched in her hand like a baby holding its bottle. I could not deal with this right now. Ever since she had come into our lives it had been nothing but chaos.

"Why don't you go lay down, Renée." Charlie saw my eyes narrow and steered her towards the living room before something really bad happened.

"But I want to see Bella." I heard her slur.

"Bella's busy right now." He replied as he shushed her, tucking her in with a blanket. He took the bottle from her hand and brought it into the kitchen with him, setting it on the counter beside the sink. I sunk into a chair at the table.

"What do we do?" I asked wearily.

"We have to be there for our friends." Charlie replied, looking at his hands. "To console them."

"That's a good idea." I nodded, but looked into the living room where Renée was laying, snoring already. "What about drunky magoo?"

"Leave her here; I'm sure she can take care of herself." Charlie rolled his eyes. "She has all these years."

I grabbed a sweater and followed Charlie out to the cruiser, and we drove in silence to La Push, not sure what to say to each other. We were also not very good at comforting each other. Charlie pulled in to the Clearwater residence, and we walked to the back yard, where large amount of people stood, consoling each other in groups. Charlie found someone to console almost right away, leaving me to walk around. I noticed the lack of the overly muscled, exaggeratedly tall pack of wolves among the mix.

"There you are Bella." Bina's usual excitement was toned down to match the mood of the day, but I could see her almost vibrating with the effort.

"Hey Bina." I replied, turning around to see her. She was wearing a tiny black dress with black pantyhose and a cardigan over it. She looked very fit to the occasion and adorable at the same time.

"Do you know where everyone else is?" I asked, walking around with her. She shrugged.

"Seth and Leah aren't even here." She looked at me, her eyebrows raised. "Do you know where they are?"

"No." I said, and I honestly didn't.

We had rounded the yard and came upon Sue, who was setting out snacks. She looked up at us sadly, her red-rimmed eyes wet with tears. Emily was helping her bustling into and out of the house with snacks and refreshments, her face wet with tears as well.

"Sue." Bina said, pulling Sue in for a hug. Sue crumpled into Bina's small embrace, grasping at her back.

"It was so sudden." She said, straightening up. "I wish I had the chance to have some time to process it, but everyone started coming over to share their thanks."

"It's a big day today." I heard the familiar gravely voice coming from off to the side. Old Quil made his way over to me.

"Has it ever. It has been a busy week." I replied. He nodded in agreement, watching Sue run around.

"It was premature, earlier than he should have died. He will be missed." Old Quil said solemnly.

"Old Quil." I started, the thought striking me as he said that.

"Yes Bella."

"What would happen to Jake if I died?" I asked, my death seeming to be the most likely situation. Jake was unbreakable.

"He would be in incredible pain. It would most likely lead into death." He responded. "Why don't you try to avoid dying, or becoming a vampire, which seems just as likely. Maybe even more." Quil looked down at me.

"You heard." I said, blushing even thought it hadn't been my fault. He laughed quietly.

"Of course I heard. Jacob was tearing apart the countryside looking for you." Quil said. He gave me a pat on the back. "It's good to have you safe and alive though." He said, and hobbled away. That simple statement warmed my heart. Old Quil didn't show affection very much, and certainly not to someone outside the tribe.

"Sad day." Bina said plainly, walking towards me again. She had just been engaged in a conversation with Emily. "The funeral and everything will be held tonight and then a ceremony on the beach."

"Understandable." I replied, taking her hand. She squeezed mine back, giving me a small smile. Harry had been the father she never had; hers had run out when she was just a young child. We had that in common. We didn't need anymore words as we sat down at the chairs in the dining room and watched people milling around outside. It felt odd not to have Jake around, almost like a part of me was missing. I rested my chin on the chair and waited for him to come back, anchored to Bina by our joined hands.

Embry was the first to come back, dressed in khaki shorts and a light t-shirt. He made a beeline for Bina, pulling her into his arms and kissing the top of her head. She allowed him, wrapping her arms around him. He stared at me over Bina's head, his friendly eyes wide and shocked. I stared back at him, getting some comfort in looking into his eyes. He mouthed _hi _at me and steered Bina off outside, his arm still around her.

Jared and Paul then joined the mix, almost blending in with everyone else, looking angry and sad at the same time, consoling people they knew and talking amongst the crowd. I sat still in the dining room, a pane of glass between everyone else and me. Sam followed shortly, Seth bouncing behind him, a change evident. That explained what the impromptu meeting was about, and why the pack was out. It still didn't explain where Leah was.

About an hour and a half later, after almost everyone had petered out, heading to home make food for the beach ceremony tonight and as an offering to Sue, Jake walked out of the trees dragging Leah by the arm. She had a scowl on, but followed along obediently. Jake walked inside, spotting me immediately. He let go of Leah and scooped me up into a crushing hug, my feet dangling off the ground.

"Jake, can't breathe." I whispered, hugging him back.

"Oh sorry." He said, releasing me a little. He lowered me back down and led me into the family room, where the first thing I saw was a ruined couch, completely torn to bits and a broken window.

"Wha…what happened?" I asked, my jaw dropping.

"Pretty bad, isn't it?" Leah asked from behind us, leaning against the wall.

"Yeah, a little bit." I said.

"Leah's been a little moody lately. Sue noticed and asked her why. Leah freaked out, phased, and ruined this couch. Harry's weak heart couldn't take the shock of a girl phasing into a wolf, had a fatal heart attack. Seth, shocked and angry at the death of his father, phased as well." Jake explained, pointing to the couch. "They both made their grand escape out the window, very much disoriented. It took so long to get Leah calmed down enough to change back."

"Leah's the first female wolf ever." I gasped, realizing the absurdity of it.

"Yeah, Sam's not happy." Jake replied.

For the first time in a while, I really looked at Leah; she was out of her normal sweat suit attire and dressed in a tank top and shorts. I noticed how much taller she had become, much more muscled and lean. Her exotic beauty shone out, accented by her new physique. She was gorgeous.

"Like what you see?" Leah snapped, and I realized I had been staring. Jake began to put me behind him, as angry Leah was subject to spontaneous phasing. "Oh relax Jacob, I can handle it much better than most of you."

"You're beautiful, Leah." I said, still staring at her. Her eyes flashed, and then softened as she looked at me in surprise.

"What." Her posture softened with that little compliment, her rigid walls almost came down. I stepped forward towards her with my arms outstretched.

"Bella…" Jake warned, being overprotective as usual. I ignored him and hugged Leah, squeezing her waist tightly. She hesitated, but eventually laid her arms around me, hugging me back.

"It's going to be okay." I whispered.

"It's not though." Leah pulled away, looking at me. "It's not." She then ran upstairs and slammed her door.

"It's hard to get through to her, don't worry about it." Jake said, coming up behind me.

"Sam's worried. He got a glimpse into her thoughts and sees how much in pain she is. It's going to be hard."

"I imagine it will be."

"It doesn't help that she's a girl though." He said, sighing. "This is going to make things so much harder. Quil was already wondering if he was going to get to see her naked, believe it or not."

"I believe it." I replied. Quil was a horny teenager. "How's he doing with the whole imprint gift thing?" Jake pursed his lips, looking thoughtful.

"He's flustered; I guess the Leah thing is his way of covering it. He doesn't know how he's going to be able to do it, and how he'll be wise enough to lead imprints to where they should be. It's a lot to take in. Luckily, the blood oath made it so that his imprint sight, or gift if you rather, is hidden from the rest of us. I wouldn't want to be in his position." Jake sighed, looking over at the broken couch.

"It's a part of who he is though, I'm sure he'll get used to it." I replied, following his gaze.

"He has to." Jake replied, grinning at me. I smiled back. "Now, we've been volunteered to clean up this mess." Jake gestured towards the couch.

"Of course we have." I rolled my eyes, but I didn't actually mind the activity. "You pick up most of the couch, and I'll sweep up the remnants, alright?" I said, half joking. Jake nodded and went to work, not getting the funny part of it. I kept that to myself.

"I'll bring this down to the beach; we can cut it up and burn it." He said, lifting the couch like I would a pillow.

I nodded, and Jake left. I grabbed a broom and dustpan and swept up the mess of wood and glass easily. I had thrown it in the fireplace when Jake came back, not out of breath.

"That was easy." I laughed as he wiped his brow.

"You did a good job." He messed up my hair.

"Jake!" I squealed and ducked out from under him. "Thank you." He left again without a word, so I sat back down in the chair to wait for him. Luckily, it wasn't raining today, or it would have been coming in the open window. I didn't know how we were going to get that fixed, so I just ignored it.

Jake came back into the living room a couple minutes later single-handedly carrying a couch. I got up to help him without thinking.

"Bells, I don't need help." He laughed as he set it down where the old one was. "Sue told me this was in the shed. I'm not sure why she was keeping an extra couch around."

"What are we going to do about the window?" I asked. Jake seemed to have all the answers.

"We'll board it up with cardboard. Sue's going into the city soon anyway. She said she'd pick up a window for us to install."

"Okay. Good." I spied the materials for covering the window in the far corner and jumped at them, taping the cardboard in place over the window after picking out the broken glass.

"I'm glad we finished that task." Jake said, standing up and putting his hands on his waist. "Because we've got a long day and more tasks ahead of us."

"I'm up for it." I replied as Jake pulled me into his arms.


End file.
